XII. Addresses
Tests were over finally, and the atmosphere at school was finally back to normal.
Well, as normal as hormonal, irrational teenagers trying to find their way around life could be.
Around the cafeteria, everyone was settling back into their usual routines.
The jocks were back to their rambunctious laughter, the cheerleaders back to their gossips, the nerds weren't present, they remained library-goers. It saved them the occasional taunts from the brawny, football-playing airheads.
Everyone else was back in their element too.
Most importantly, the library was back to being quiet.
But for Raven, nothing was fine.
Hayden hadn't come to school the previous day, and even on that day, he was nowhere to be found.
She'd gone to the library, even to the disgusting male toilets, and back and forth classes, but she just couldn't find him.
His calls weren't going through too.
Raven felt tears prick at her eyes, and she hated herself for it.
A few months ago, before Hayden had come to their school, she loved the quiet.
She found peace and comfort in her solitude. And when she wasn't, she loved the attention she got from people, the exhilarating feeling that someone needed her, acknowledged her.
She hadn't talked to her friends as much in a while. They hadn't bothered to seek her out, so she'd done the same.
She didn't mind. They let her be most of the time.
They knew she didn't stick with them much. She was free spirited, she moved from one place to the other, mingling with anyone and everyone but never fully letting herself be with them.
Then Hayden had shown up in her life.
He wasn't a whirlwind presence that came in, demanding to be seen.
He wasn't a main character kind of person, one that everything and everyone revolved around, who had admirers at every corner and an intense life that peaked everyone's interest.
He was beautiful, untainted, awkward.
He was quiet, he stood by the sidelines and blended into the crowd.
But there was something in him that would always strike you, something that would want to make you stare.
And the fact that someone that uninteresting would evoke such interest was enough reason for anyone to be more confused by him.
Raven understood, firsthand how much one could get taken in by Hayden, and that was probably why she felt as empty as she did.
She missed him......a lot.
God! She missed him!
She missed seeing him read, the slight smile that was always on his face as he flipped from page to page, how he looked so far from reality.
She missed watching his brown eyes light up in a smile, his dark skin giving off a dim glow under the fluorescence.
She missed the way he looked uncomfortable when she teased him or said something boldly, how she could see the spark of excitement in his eyes even though his body language said he felt embarrassed.
She missed feeling his gaze on her sometimes as she pretended to read, how he'd train his gaze on her for a long moment before abruptly turning away like he was afraid she'd catch him.
She missed their walks in the park, especially the one they'd had during the test period.
She missed every little bit and every tiny piece that made Hayden Keating who he was.
***
The next day was the same, Hayden still hadn't come to school.
By now, Raven was plain scared.
As far as she knew, there wasn't anyone that knew where he lived.
And they'd never gotten round to speaking about family to a great deal. All Raven knew of the brown eyed boy was that he had a little sister who he adored.
The previous night, somewhere in between picturing Hayden's smile and doodling his name on the back of her book, Raven had decided she was going to see him.
The minute she entered school, and ascertained that Hayden was yet again absent, she'd headed straight for Matt.
When he wasn't hanging out with the rest of his squad, Matt was cooped up in the E-library with a computer.
Raven headed for him, raking her eyes over the space till she spotted him.
The closer she got to him, the louder the noise of a keyboard being rapped furiously hit her.
"What did the keyboard do to you?" She asked quietly behind him, an eyebrow raised.
Matt looked shocked frankly, his eyes were wide and his lips parted the slightest bit.
He adjusted his glasses on the bridge of his nose in a way Raven presumed Harry Potter would've when he found something oddly strange.
"Raven?" His voice came, unmistakably laced with disbelief.
She wasn't surprised. It was the first time she was talking to him in a one-on-one conversation.
It wasn't that she avoided him or didn't talk to him, just that they hardly ever saw except it was in the hallways. And for some reason, Raven felt he was intimidated by her presence.
Maybe it was the way he hardly met her gaze or walked in the opposite direction of where she walked, but she got that vibe from him.
"Yes", she responded. "... I believe that's my name".
Matt chuckled at that, causing Raven to be less tense.
"I'm sorry", he said, brows furrowed slightly. "It's just that I didn't expect to see you here, talking with me", he didn't say that last part though.
"Didn't expect that I'd want to be in a computer-filled room. I look the opposite of tech savvy, don't I?" She teased.
Matt made a move to justify himself, when the girl laughed softly, "You'd be correct if that's what you thought. I just about know how to use Ms-Word, every other thing's a blank".
Matt laughed out loud at that one, earning a few glares from some people, which soon turned into shock when they saw Raven next to him.
"I understand--" He made to say, when Raven caught him off with a pointed look, "No you don't".
Matt laughed, more softly this time, his hands stratching his nape awkwardly, "No,.... I don't" He laughed sheepishly.
Raven smiled at him, an actual Raven smile this time, teeth gleaming, eyes crinkling and all.
Matt could feel the heat rise up his neck slowly, his heart going into overdrive.
Raven Stone was beautiful.
"What brings you here", he managed to say, forcing his emotions down.
"I need your help" Raven said, her gaze turning serious.
If it had come from anyone else, Matt would've felt disgusted. He'd have felt repulsed at them asking for help only moments after their first actual conversation.
But coming from Raven, and knowing how she almost always kept to herself, he felt honoured.
"What's the problem?" He asked, concerned.
"I need an address from the school records", Matt felt something sink in his gut as the realization hit him, but he faced Raven squarely, not letting any of his emotions slip through.
"Let me guess, Hayden's?"
Raven wasn't surprised that he'd figured it out, she'd always known Matt was perceptive. It was evident in the gaze behind the glasses, calculative and possessing a good sense of judgement.
Matt was a fresh dose of maturity where the others chased what seemed like it; booze, girls and — even though Raven didn't know how they seemed to think it would help them in any way — horrible grades.
"Yes" Was her short answer.
"I already checked it yesterday. I was worried about him too".
Raven was surprised. She'd have thought that the first person to be worried about Hayden was that foolish girl, Hilda.
The thought of her laced Raven's tongue with a foul taste.
"If you're free today, we could go after school?" Matt asked, fixing his glasses on his nose brige again.
At this point, Raven couldn't determine if he did it out of necessity or habit, but it looked cool.
It reminded her of Harry Potter.
Matt looked the Harry Potter from the movies too. He had a dark brown-black, healthy looking mop of hair, relatively clear, pale skin with a dot of acne on his forehead, an a beautiful pair of cerulean blue eyes that almost put Hayden's to shame hiding behind his glasses.
But his and Harry's resemblance ended at their facial structures. Matt was a lot taller than Harry was, and more built.
He wasn't so muscular that you would see his pecs through his shirt, but his arms looked quite defined.
In her assessment, Raven had forgot to give Matt a reply, and now he was looking at her worriedly.
"Raven?".
She tuned back into their conversation, slightly embarrassed.
"Of course. Can I have your number? I'll call you once I'm done at the library".
Matt fought back his smile at Raven's request.
He never thought he'd see the day.
But the young man knew not to get ahead of himself, judging by how he'd seen Raven look at Hayden, he knew he shouldn't let himself go too deep.
For three years, he'd harboured a weight so heavy inside him, but for the sake of Raven and for his own self preservation, he had to try letting go.
Even as he punched his number into Raven's phone, he knew it wouldn't be that easy.
But he would try.
*****
~Ameenah
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