Chapter 31: chapter 31
A week had passed since they had a good meal at the Adamson's house. Oliver couldn't keep his thoughts to himself and was always lost. His family was going to pick up Sofia from the train station, even though she insisted on coming home by a taxi. His parents sat in the front seats chattering all the way while he closed his eyes and lost in thoughts as usually.
It continued to feel as if he never left Vukan's sight or premise. The boy was all he had in his head during their lengthy drive back home. The tattoos on Vukan's chest seemed so deep and he could find himself trying to draw several meanings from them. The fluidity with which they had been drawn, coupled with his flawless skin made it completely mesmerizing to think about.
He unfolded the note in his possession once again and began to read through the words. He had read them to the point of committing them to memory, but something felt different this time as he focused on each word etched into the note.
Vukan's description about how he felt was flawless, coupled with the attention he had paid to details in the images of Oliver he drew. Oliver ran his finger across his lower lip as he imagined himself through Vukan's eyes. The thought got him feeling absolutely uneasy but in a good way. He couldn't quite believe what was going on, but something about being around Vukan had stirred his emotions.
"What am I doing?" Oliver queried himself.
He didn't want to think about Vukan when he believed his heart still belonged and remained with Bruce Scott. Thinking about Vukan made him feel guilty and unworthy of Bruce Scott's love, but it was becoming increasingly impossible not to think of Vukan. The times they had spent together were magical and mind blowing.
Asides Vukan's recent uncouth scenario, he had been perfect since they were beginning to get to know each other.
"Oh my God! What am I doing?" Oliver felt himself struggling with picking a side.
He wanted every single thought he harbored about Vukan to ease off into a nonexistent state. He wanted it to water down and flow away so he could focus on Bruce Scott as best as possible. Yet, it was far harder than he could have imagined. There was a lot he had to think about and a whole lot which he needed to start understanding and accepting.
The first was the drawings and how Vukan had groomed his imaginations around them.
Every drawing he had seen of himself in Vukan's room revolved around the bridge and their time in school. Three had been about times Oliver knew they weren't speaking yet. The boy had even gone as far as drawing him in a pensive mood when he struggled with his mental health after Bruce Scott's thoughts flooded his mind in class.
"Has he been following me?" Oliver asked himself.
The question opened up his thought processes and he felt himself gasp aloud and in a manner that caught his parents' attention.
"Honey, are you okay?" his mother asked.
"Sure", he replied simply.
Oliver could not believe himself; he had managed to miss so much even while it was happening before him. He had never asked Vukan what he was doing around the bridge, before he rushed in to come and save him. He had never questioned him about how he knew his way around the bridge either. They never spoke of it and it never came up for once.
"He must have been watching me", Oliver concluded appropriately.
It was the only explanation he could muster for why Oliver could have had such time-sensitive drawings of him.
"What is his deal?" he asked himself further.
"Oliver. I know you were still unhappy with Vukan about his behavior the other day, but you could have indulged him better, seeing the poor boy is really growing to like you a lot", his father said out of the blue.
Gemma Douglas added her piece, "You could tell by the way his eyes lingered all over you right until he left. I think he likes you a lot but doesn't quite know how to get his thoughts through".
Oliver realized his parents were right and he had been blind to everything. A swarm of guilt rushed through his chest and he tucked the note Vukan had written him into his breast pocket. It was an act to pretend as a rough guy at the family meal in the restaurant so that the families would break this arrangement.
That stupid! He has been thinking about me all the time while he was getting wounded in the end.
"Dad, can you please drop me off here?" Oliver asked his father.
His parents turned to look at him in loss. "I don't understand. Where are you going?"
Oliver needed some fresh air to think before taking what he believed could be a really difficult decision within the next few minutes.
"I just need some fresh air", he replied. 'I will be home soon, I promise".
His father obliged and dropped him off at a safe spot before waving Oliver goodbye.
"If you need a ride on your way home, call us!' his mother noted.
He waved them off and immediately took out his cellphone. His heart raged and he could hear it beat like a bull badgering a barn door, right underneath his chest.
"He has always loved me", Oliver whispered excitedly and with fear in his voice. "How did I not see it?"
His parents' words had brought proper clarity, mixed with the realization that Vukan had always been there for him when needed. The times they laughed hard were fun. The time Vukan fought for him was even better. Everything about the times they spent together was nothing short of magical and the full effect just began to play through his mind.
"He gave me the best graduation gift and I ruined it", Oliver felt guilty as he punched Vukan's digits into his phone aggressively.
He had deleted the boy's number and hoped never to text or speak with him again. Yet, it was ingrained in his mind and nothing could erase it no matter how hard he had previously tried to do so.
"Please, pick up! Pick up!" Oliver sounded nervous as he tore into his finger.
Vukan's cell phone continued to ring without him picking up. It was odd and very baffling because he wasn't one to neglect his cellphone. Oliver decided to reach out to Vukan's parents but he didn't have their digits and it provided him with another roadblock.
'Jae!" he chimed aloud and scrolled through his contacts.
He had exchanged contacts with Jae on the night they had their hangout and they corresponded for a while too.
"Hey, Oliver", Jae sounded surprised as soon as the call connected. "I wasn't expecting to hear from you.
"Why is that?" Oliver asked.
Jae fell silent for a moment before replying, "Well, Vukan told me what happened between you two and considering he is about to leave the country, I thought you two still hadn't patched things up. I believed things couldn't be patched up".
"What!?" Oliver screamed into the phone. 'Vukan is doing what!?'
Jae's silence only got Oliver more restless. It made him jittery where he stood and he couldn't quite control himself anymore.
"Shit! He didn't tell you? I shouldn't have told you then", Jae responded. "Well, since the cat is out of the bag, I guess there is nothing I can do about it".
"Where is he headed and when is his flight?" Oliver asked.
He had not glimpsed the slightest sight of Vukan going anywhere when he went into his room just some hours before. In fact, nothing about his belonging gave such a hint off.
"Oakway Airport. He booked a first class ticket to… ", Jae paused. 'I don't think I remember, but he is due to leave by seven this evening".
Oliver glanced at his watch and he realized he had just two hours till Vukan's flight would take off. He was no less than two hours away. He ended the call without uttering any goodbye, hurriedly booked a taxi and waited impatiently as the car arrived.
"I will give you double your pay if you get to Oakland Airport in the next two hours or less!" he said to the driver with his eyes glistening with intent and desperation.
The man shot him a bewildered look because it was near impossible, but he stepped on the gas and sped off like a lunatic without saying a word.
"Please wait for me", Oliver whispered while he grew even more nervous in the backseat of the car.
He ran his fingers through his hair and wiped sweat off of his face intermittently. He wouldn't forgive himself if Vukan left without being able to hear how much he realized he loved the boy. He wasn't sure he would ever forgive himself if Vukan left without saying goodbye.
Oliver's eyes watered as he lowered his head into his thighs and cried. He realized he had failed Vukan and spurned the boy's genuine affections all for a dream he was still holding unto. He saw Bruce Scott and what he felt for the boy as what it was; a desire to hold unto the past regardless of how much he might not really need it.
He felt nothing but regret and shame as the car sped away. He wanted Vukan and he wished Vukan would wait for him and hopefully still want him.
***
Tossing more than enough cash into the car for the driver to get hold of, Oliver raced out as he sprinted through the corridors until he arrived by the departure screen and notice board. The time was just a minute from seven, but the announcement about the flight fixed for seven having left earlier, set him toppling over.
His knees gave way and his heart seemed to stop. The announcement felt like an anvil had been dropped on his shoulders, while watching the clock blare aloud to inform everyone that it was seven already, made the situation even worse and unbearable.
"No… No… No! No!" Oliver shrieked with his hands above his head.
He looked around, hoping and praying for a miracle, but couldn't quite will himself to believe that one was about to happen. His bitter cries attracted passer-by and those who walked through could only wonder what was wrong with him as they shook their heads and kept on moving. Oliver didn't care about them though… he didn't care about anybody in that moment but Vukan.
"I caused this", Oliver confessed. "I caused him to leave!"
He could not believe his actions over the course of their friendship. He had clearly stated he wanted nothing but friendship with Vukan but it didn't stop the boy from being there for him in every step of the way.
"I am sorry, Vukan", Oliver wept bitterly as he remained on his knees. "I love you. I have loved you for a very long time now but never really believed it".
He had assumed he wasn't at fault for a while. He had chosen to rely on what he once had and didn't give much thought into actually respecting what he could have.
"I am sorry", he pleaded again, wailing as loud as his voice could permit him. The poem re-vibrated in his mind like an audio player on the repeat mode.
There were no kings or kingdoms,
There were no chariots or horses
But I was fighting a war,
With myself in front of the mirror,
Your shadow released me from the dark dungeon,
and then I believed there was a silver moon along with the burning sun.
Vukan
Bruce Scott's death was the last thing to ever make Oliver weep in the manner he did. He wished he had done things differently though. He wished he had respected the fact that Vukan made him happy in ways he had not been for a while.
"I wish you were here", Oliver muttered as he scrolled through his phone, looking at the picture they had taken, with glassy eyes.
"Well, I couldn't quite leave either", the familiar voice replied, with a shadow standing over Oliver.
Trying hard not to believe he was dreaming, Oliver looked up to see Vukan standing before him with his backpack slumped on his back. He jumped up without uttering any word, wrapped his arms around Vukan and planted a kiss into his neck.
Vukan wrapped his arms around Oliver tightly in response as they both wept subtly and soaked each other's presence in as best as they could.
"I loved you… I love you and I have always loved you from the moment I set my eyes on you", Vukan professed his love once again.
Oliver cocked his head aggressively to show he believed Vukan now. "I know… I know and I am so sorry for not seeing it".
They peeled apart for a moment and then hugged again for an even longer time. Oliver felt perfect just being there in Vukan's embrace.
"I couldn't leave you", Vukan confessed. 'I tried to leave but it felt as if my heartbeat just wouldn't exist anymore".
The sweet words prompted Oliver to blush as they finally peeled apart and gawked into each other's eyes for some time.
"Don't leave me again", Oliver said. "Stay with me and never leave me again".
Vukan promised he wasn't ever going to do that. "I will always be with you".
The assuring words brought more tears to their eyes before they turned around to see people had been staring at them. Being loved in the manner Vukan had expressed himself, left Oliver's heart with joy and positive sores.
"What happens now?" Vukan asked.
Oliver, with a smirk, replied, "Now, we go home".
The words gladdened Vukan's heart and he locked his hand tightly with Oliver's. He didn't wish to ever have to leave his hand again if he could.
The moment felt perfect.
"Good thing I drove down in my car", Vukan said as they arrived at the parking lot where he had paid to have his car taken care of.
He unlocked the door and assisted Oliver in, before rounding the car and getting into the driver's side.
"Here we go", Vukan joyed as he stole another glance at Oliver.
Oliver replied, "Today has to be the best day of my life. Nothing can go wrong".
Vukan nodded and ignited the car as he pulled out of the parking spot. Oliver adjusted himself in his seat and flicked his seatbelt in before looking through the passenger mirror. His heart thumped in one crazily loud beat, as his mouth slowly opened with his eyes following suit. He realized he might have just spoken too early.
Right there, walking out of the airport with some other arrivals, was none other than Bruce Scott. It was him and there was no confusing him with anyone else.
Bruce Scott.
....
THE END
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