Chapter 44: Chapter 41: Ashes
"Everybody seems to be looking at us..." Joy said as she looked around them and saw that almost all the students that they came across was looking at them; maybe because of Light in her side since his appearance was really ethereal- tall, pale, silver-haired, golden eyed, sharp nose- everything a person would want to have was in him.
"Just... Walk." he said coldly- his eyes locked onto Joy's then at the road.
He.....
He was still cold as usual... He still had the mysterious aura going on around him, his reliable back....
The features of a certain someone Joy know for sure yet she can't remember...
_______
At 7:10, they arrived at school just in time for the weekly flag ceremony where Joy saw Fallon talking with Mari- who seems happy now. Joy looked at her wrists and saw that the wound on which Fallon's cuts were marked were already healed.
Sensing their presence, Fallon looked at them and smiled slightly at Joy, then to Light who was looking at her with the golden gaze she was not able to overcome. She immediately averted her gaze from him, blushing as Mari teased her.
"Seems like everyone likes you Light." Joy said, out of the blue which shocked him.
Joy was still going to talk more but he suddenly went down to the point that their faces were at the same level with each other- making Joy blush in an instant. She felt his gaze and it was so intense for her she can barely breathe.
Joy looked side by side- left and right- to possibly avert her gaze but he sensed that.
"Look at me Hope." he said as he used his fingers to touch her chin and directed her face to face him.
"So what...? It's only you whom I like." he said and went abandoning her to go the boys' line.
Joy can jump with joy and enthusiasm in the field- and she can faint with what he did but as he turned towards the line, Ajan was there- and she hugged him.
Wordless, she stood in front of them, with the pain that continuously stabbed her heart which Cammy, who stood at Ajan's back also felt- but his is deeper- darker maybe.
Cammy subconsciously held his heart as if in pain and as soon as Joy saw him, she came dashing forward to him- but when she did, he collapsed on the ground- and as she ran towards him, it was as if the world was in slow motion. She could hear her heart beating.... Her feet running, her breathing...
Light saw Cammy and pulled away from Ajan's hug, accidentally pushing her and making her fall on the ground.
It took a while for Ajan to get up from the ground because of shock due to Light's push. She felt dizziness creeping over herself... anger has also built up on her because Light chose to run for Joy.. Every person in the field surrounded her as she laid on the floor, but she saw someone with them- a familiar face she can never forget- Cammy....
And...
And..
He is fading away...
Ajan crept to go to them, - hoping to get past the crowd - but then, she realized that all of the people around her stopped and Cammy, Light and Joy were seriously far from her.
______
"Cammy!"
"Cammy! Cammy!"
Ajan screamed as hard as she could while Cammy continued to feel pain and fade away.
Cammy immediately tried to get up and get past Joy to go to her, still holding his chest. Light and Joy refused to let him go to her because he was really fading right now- he is dispersing and parts of him was becoming ashes that drifted in the air.
"Please... let me go... If this is the last moment of my existence.... I want to be with her... I want to be close to her... Because.... that is what I can never do again... That is what I never did.. Please... Let me... Be with her... I'm begging you..." he said and held Joy's hand, pleading.
Tears were coming out from his eyes which were all smiles before... But now... All Joy saw in his eyes were emptiness.. And pain.
" No... Cammy.. Please don't do this to yourself... We will find a way to fix you... I swea- "
He placed his hand on Joy's cheecks and smiled so wide...
" Joy... Please stop now... You can never fix me because i have been crumpled into pieces... into insignificance.. All my parts are lost now and they can never be found. I want to go to my happiness... and you know that she is the embodiment of happiness in my eyes. Let me go... I'm begging you.. Light... Joy... Please... " He said as tears streamed his face and looked at Light, who seemed to be in abdication.
Light was about to talk when Cammy suddenly stood up and ran to her.
Joy was about to get him back with them when Light grabbed her arms and shook his head.
" This is the first time since he died that he will be happy... Sadly, this first is also his last. But this is how things are ought to be. When he saw Ajan, he wanted to live again, so bad that he began to repent for dying. The moment he felt that hurt, he started fading."
Joy looked at Cammy as he tried to go to her... He fell... He...
He was crying... not of pain, but of happiness to be seen by her again- for the chance to be with her...
But Cammy was dispersing... He is slowly disappearing that that Joy and Light cannot bear to watch anymore...
___________
[Cammy's thoughts]
[Ajan....]
The most beautiful face Cammy has ever seen was blocked by the people that surrounded her as she sat on the ground, crying and shouting his name.
[Ajan..]
She was becoming inaudible and vague as Cammy saw himself turning into ashes as he came closer to her.
[Ajan... Can you hear me?Please respond... I want you to hear me...]
Ajan was still crying and it shattered his broken soul into pieces. He hated to see her cry because it devastated him more.
[But there is absolutely no sense of me thinking what I want to tell her... And saying it out loud in my head...]
[I'm sorry... I can no longer talk since I'm fading away.. And my voice is gone.]
.
[I know you can't... You will not be able to hear me... But if there is a .1% probability that you can realize what I want to tell you.... I'll be very happy...]
[Shhhh... Stop crying now... I hate to see you cry... My universe... The ever beautiful sunshine of my life...]
[Ah I stumbled again... It's really hard to walk in this state now. But I will still get up to get to you...]
[My happiness...]
[Stop crying please... ]
[It devastates me and hurts me more... And it makes me want to live again and repent for dying]
Cammy tripped again and he was getting dizzier every second as he saw his hand dispersing into thin air...
[Please live..]
[Continue living..]
[One lifetime is too limited and short to love you... I'll be sure to search for you in my next life... If there is...]
[Then maybe in my next life, I will be able to stay with you...]
[And maybe be enough for you..]
[And be someone who makes you happy..]
[Live a happy life...]
[Please...]
[Goodbye...]
[I love you..]
[I can feel my end now... Just... I want to hold you as I disappear... If I could...]
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