Chapter 22: Part II, Chapter IV - Memories
"Sir?" I called. The man slowly looked up and smiled for a few seconds before dropping to a frown.
"I don't like this" he said "Free me from his wicked grasp. The icing on the cake"
I saw that he was wearing an ear piece as I looked closer.
"What's your name?" I asked.
"He will take a step closer" he said, not answering my question "And you will vanish from this world"
"I hate riddles" interrupted Sherlock.
"You" said the man, turning his head to Sherlock's direction "Remember who you are and the lights of fate will cease"
His neck bled with a sound of slashing. This time the collar had been upgraded as indicated from his head falling off of his body and rolling to us, leaving a trail of blood on the floor and some of the cash.
"A little surprise from a friend of yours, I presume?" said Sherlock. We heard the constant tapping of footsteps as I looked behind to see a bunch of guards telling us to get on our knee and shocking us with a taser gun.
I woke up the next morning in a cell with Sherlock.
"Jane!" I cried out, standing up and grasping the bars. Knowing there was nothing we could do. I sat down in total silence.
We were brought in for questioning and I had to answer the same question with the same answer over and over again. Why were we robbing a bank? Did we kill the man? Why did the chicken cross the damn road?
The sun was bright and hot, high up, indicating that it was noon when Sherlock broke the silence
"We don't need to go to London anymore" said he.
"That's a pity"
"I'm serious, Animal Home! The shock from the taser gun, oh God! Is this deja vu?"
I said nothing, looking at him.
"I remember something!"
My eyes widened as I sat closer to him.
"What did you remember?" I asked.
"Robbing that exact bank wasn't my first time" he sank his head on the palm of his hands "There's someone in my head! a girl, and she's telling me something"
"Can you describe what she looked like?"
"She's cute and young" he claimed
"Hair color? Anything?"
"It's all so blurry, Radar"
"What?" I asked upon getting shocked by that last word "Radar?"
"Yeah" said he "Isn't that your nickname?"
"How did you know? I never thought i'd hear that again and not from Emily"
"You never told me?"
"I never told anyone, even my wife doesn't know about it"
"About what?" asked a familiar voice, I turned to see that it was Jane holding her cane and bailing us out.
"You two getting arrested at the same time was not part of our bet, but you still got arrested and you know what that means"
"I deduce that it is something I don't want to know" said Sherlock.
"More to the current situation" I interrupted "Mr. Holmes, here, just knocked some memories back"
"Does he remember his real name yet?"
"Shut up, i'm Sherlock Holmes, i'm a high functioning sociopath"
"Let's get outta here dipshits" she pinched my ear and dragged me out. We went home but not before I yelled "I am gay" in my library and getting fired. I had to reassure everybody that I am, in fact, straighter than a curve.
"Tell us the stupidity you have recovered" Said I, to Sherlock, setting down some tea.
"Stupidity, my dear boy, is when your mom gave birth to you"
"Stupidity is when you can locate many things but not the location of your best friend who you claim had been kidnapped by your rival, a PE teacher"
"You guys are entertaining to listen to" Interrupted my wife "Imagine if I could still see"
"A PE Teacher?" asked Sherlock
"Moriarty's a Professor isn't he?"
"Oh please, he would never be that dissapointing. Him, to you, is a type of dessert, in case you forgot. Going by the name of Cupcake, is in fact, clever, to confuse people's minds and underestimate him"
"Clever compared to you, now tell us what you remember"
"The girl. Leela!"
"Who is Leela?" asked Jane.
"She was my lover, though, you could say, the Irene to my Sherlock. The woman"
"Gross"
"Hey, you're the one who's married!"
"We still consider ourselves best friends, but not a couple"
"A couple of idiots, anyway, who have I been remembering as Watson all this time? And how did I know William's nickname is Radar? I have an idea- tase me!"
"We don't have a taser and that's dangerous"
As if for dramatic effect, Sherlock pulled out a taser from his pocket.
"How the fuck?" I asked "Nevermind, don't answer that. I'm not gonna tase you"
"Neither will I" said jane.
"Then let the dog do it" suggested Sherlock.
"You will not use our dog"
Emily ran up to us and sat down, wagging her tail as if she had been listening with her little dog ears.
"Ah yes, here, tase me wherever you like" he placed the taser on her mouth pointing directly at him and started to produce the light and cackling sound of electricity.
"What the fuck is going on right now?" asked my wife.
Sherlock fell to the floor shaking as the taser's electrick shock hit his legs.
"Isn't this masochism?" I asked.
"Well, my dear boy" said he, with a shakey voice "Atleast you're not looking at a moaning masochistic horse.
"You look more like an otter"
The sound of cracks and the lights of electric currents went on and on until 5:00pm. I was amazed at how much he could take without getting a cardiac arrest.
"That is enough!" I announced, trying to take the taser away, I accidentally got hit and fell on the floor, shaking.
"J-Jane" I called with a shakey voive "Help!"
My wife whistled and our dog stopped her actions and dropped the taser device.
"Tell me when you guys are done shaking from the electric shock" said she. Sherlock finally stood up to say that it did not work.
"Perhaps one method only works once. We need a new method"
"And what do you suggest?" asked Jane
"Instead of going to London, we travel back to your home town"
"I'm sorry, what?" I asked, finally being able to stand up. I still felt a little tingle from the electric shock "Jane and I moved here for a damn reason!"
"Yes, but I know your nickname, if you never told anyone about it, then we probably had met long before we could remember"
"Fine, but how are we gonna go there without the money that we would have gotten away if it weren't for those fucking guards?"
"Let me borrow your phone"
I did as he asked. He dialed and called.
"Hello, Officer Heinz!"
I rolled my eyes and did nothing but listen.
"Yeah? yep, huh?" he said on the phone "Really? What will you name your baby?" he laughed "So listen, i'll cut to the chase and say that we require your services and need to be transported to Idio Town. Send in your least irritating officer if you have one. Okay bye"
He hung up and returned the phone.
"On their way!"
"You know" interrupted my wife "You could've just called them earlier when we planned to go to London, right?"
"Oh, there was no need after all, plus that method is boring"
"Yet here you are doing exactly that"
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