Chapter 58: Old man tales.
I see she still stays on the sofa not wanting to head to her own room. She hasn't slept there for months, not even wanting to go in there for anything. It seems like that room is at least one last obstacle in her way. I just think for tonight I will remain quiet, she has been through enough for today. I do like that she agreed for me to live here. Even though I was here all the time, this will make it more official.
In the morning, I get up to go to work leaving her resting on the sofa. I cover her on my way leaving her a note that I will be home just a little later since I will be picking up some things from my own home. I try to leave notes or texts about where I am or going so she doesn't wander. I know she has abandonment issues at the moment, from my brother's doing. I want to try to make her feel secure and safe with me. I want to be better than him, I just hope she sees it.
I get to my office and I see the old wise man in my office, he likes to come to visit and see also what work I may have for him. I have to admit it's great to be able to talk to him. To let myself go without worrying about anyone's feelings.
"Hello Ichiru, I came to see how you are doing? Have things gotten any better? Has she contacted him yet?" The old man asks.
"She seems to be moving forward a bit. The weekend we went out and got a little closer. She kissed me just I am not sure if it was me or him she was kissing. It hasn't happened again but I am getting to move in today fully. We are trying. What do you mean contacted him? I thought she wouldn't be able to??" Ichiru snaps.
"I know how close she was to your brother, I just thought by now she might have contacted him through a dream state. It wouldn't be like last time, taking him into this world but I just have a strong feeling she hasn't let go." The old man admits. "Hmmm, if she letting go that's a good thing, then the connection will break unless she thinks your him. That would be enough to keep it strong." the old man adds.
"Damn it, I thought I was free of him, at least this way. She doesn't sleep well, she barely sleeps at all. The only time she did was Saturday when we were together. She said she finally felt safe and like her self. She is picking herself back up, seeing him again would only ruin how far she has gotten. It took her this long to even start." Ichiru snaps.
"I know how much you care Ichiru, you are living in the shadow of your brother, you may for a very long time. All I can suggest is to break the connection. Let her let go of the last of the things holding her to him. It will weaken the connection to him. I do have to admit you looking like him won't help it. If she is thinking your him........" The old man states.
"I can't help looking like him, but I can try to help her break the rest of this. He can come back, right? He is dead here and there? He doesn't exist here anymore. "Ichiru asks.
"I do not believe he can return, it has never happened before. He was meant for death in both worlds since he didn't come here before his death. His life had to play out there, so it did here as well. Where you were already over there." The old man answers.
"She can't stay with him can she? I mean never come back here give up her life for him?" Ichiru asks.
"I can't answer that, that would be up to her. They still wouldn't be in either world.......they would be dead together.." The old man states.
"Damn it! I am glad so far he hasn't come near her. I am not sure what she would do if he did a few months back. He took so much from her, he doesn't need to take more. I don't think my brother would want her to die for him. He wanted her to live on and have all that he didn't give her. Its why he did it this way. Even though she is miserable from it. This time she may have even lost full custody of her daughters, due to her grieving. Which she has to keep to herself. He didn't think this out correctly at all." Ichiru comments.
"Maybe what your brother had planned neither of you sees just yet. You both have to deal with your grief first, I am sure in the end he had a bigger picture of all this. I know he planned it step by step. He hated all he did take from her. It's too soon to realize anything Ichiru, both of you will, it will take time." The old man answers.
"I hope so because right now its a big mess. The only thing we have out of this is two special little children, and she hasn't even enjoyed them. She just hates that their son will never remember him." Ichiru replies.
"My Boy we don't know that as true just yet. He is still a baby, I am sure some of his memories from before will travel with him. They are still there just in the back of his mind, he was there from the start, being created in the anime world and brought to life here. He will be special. He will get the gifts of living with you, and the memories of his real father." The old man responds.
"None of this makes sense. I don't even know if that is a good or bad thing for him to remember? Won't he have questions? His sister won't have those memories, I guess we will deal when we get there if she even still lets me. I thought we were moving forward, with what you just said about the contact I just see it going ten steps back if that happens." Ichiru remarks.
"Time will tell all, and also heal all my boy. Sometimes it takes time to get what you really want." The old man replies.
"Yes, its been going on eleven years for me, and I still might not get it," Ichiru responds.
CREATORS' THOUGHTS 
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