Chapter 41: WTF
I lay there holding Zero close, this man was the only man or person, I ever needed. I was happy that he realized that, happy he finally felt the same. He held my heart in his hands, he was my everything.
Zero lays there also, not saying another word, not sure what to say. He just hoped, she would know he didn't want to leave her, that he had no choice. The time that they spent was running out. They were lucky, they even got this amount of time at all. It was supposed to be that he wouldn't be sent back, just now it was his time to pass away in the manga which, made it happen here as well. Zero didn't want that for her, He didn't want her to experience that. He wanted to set time back and give her all the time she lost while being with him. He just hoped that in the end, she would be happy. That he was doing the right thing. His brother's words stayed with him, that it's not what she would want. He was torn, just deep down, he felt this was better, or he hoped so.
They both lay in each other's arms, Zero taking in as much as he can, knowing it would be soon, he would never feel this again. His heart was breaking, he just didn't let her see. He kisses her forehead and holds her tight as he drifts to sleep, Alexa doing the same.
When morning comes, Alexa wakes to find herself in the hospital, not knowing how she got there or even why.
I open my eyes to find, I am in the hospital. What happened, is the only thing I could ask myself. I have wires and tubes stuck in me for some reason.
"What the hell is going on?"
"Zero? Where is Zero?" I say trying to get up from the bed.
I see my daughters at the end of my bed, just staring at me, but something about them is very different. They are not in their twenties, they are back to being teens.
"What is going on? Where is Zero?" I repeat.
"Zero? Why would she call for the anime guy?" Bri Asks.
"I have no clue, I hope everything is ok with her." Liz answers.
The nurse comes in and unhooks some of the wires and checks everything out. Joel walking in with her, which is only confusing me more. Why are they here? Why are they young? Where is Zero?
"Nurse, why am I here? What is wrong with me?" I ask.
"It seems nothing is wrong with you now, but you were pregnant and ran into some complications, you have been in a coma for months." The nurse answers.
"Wait, What? Coma?" I say. Thinking pregnant, Then I did have Zeros child? I am so confused.
"Yes, your pressure went high and you went into preeclampsia, which put you in a coma. The babies were born a few days ago. So it seems now your pressure is back to normal and you're doing great." That nurse replies.
"Where is my husband? I respond.
"Joel has been here the whole time, he is standing right there." The nurse states.
"I mean Zero," I say.
"Sorry, I don't know who he is." The nurse states.
Tears just run down my face, It wasn't a dream, The baby is real. Oh god, it's not Joel's is it? I think with a panic. I do my best to try to calm myself down, as I see my daughters are just as confused as I am. I don't want to worry them, I just need answers. I need to know what the hell is going on.
Joel comes up to the bed when the nurse leaves telling the girls to go and get something to drink. He sits on the bed next to me, holding my hand.
"Are you ok?" Joel asks.
"No, I don't remember any of this. What is going on? What baby?" I say trying to see what he knows, or at least his version of this mess.
Joel sits there contemplating what to say, in a way he wants to lie, and another he wants to tell the truth, so he does.
"A few months ago, you asked me to leave, you told me you had an affair but it was over, just that you still were not happy with me, so I left. A few days afterward you found out you were pregnant and not shortly after that, you fell into a coma." Joel says.
"I remember the first part, just not the last. A coma? All this time? Five months lost? Did the child's father ever come to see me?" I ask.
"Yes, five months, we had to keep you in a coma to make sure the babies would survive. And no, I am sorry to say, the father never came to visit. Whoever he is. It's just been me and the girls. I came as soon as they called me. I didn't touch anything for the babies, you can fill out their birth certificates. I am not sure what you want to put." Joel states.
"Wait, What? Babies? I was told I was having a boy. What babies?" I answer. God what the fuck is happening to me. As Joel is speaking I want to crawl under the covers and die. I feel so lost, so alone. Where did my life go? Zero where are you? Did you leave me?
"Yes, you had twins, one is a boy and one is a girl. They both have a very rare trait, they have lavender eyes." Joel replies.
"Twins, with lavender eyes," I repeat
Sobbing so hard, Joel doesn't have a clue what to do. They are Zero's no one I know otherwise has lavender eyes, he gave me the other child, I asked for, but why? Why did he leave me? WHy, bring me back to this time and place? It's the only thoughts, that are going through my mind. I still need answers, but I wouldn't be getting any from him. He already told me what he knew which wasn't much.
As for the birth certificate, what do I put? How can I write an invisible man down? He left our children. I need time to think, time to figure this out.
"I don't know what is going on Alexa, I see your hurting and lost. I am here, our home is the same, we can go back to what we had." Joel comments.
"Thank you for everything. I just don't know what is going on or what I want. I can't give you any answers. I just know, I want out of this hospital and I want to see my babies." I say tears still streaming down my face.
I know what Joel wants to do is sweet, but really? Would he be able to? Take two other children from another man? I don't feel anything for him, sitting here. Its been ten years for me that I have even been with him. I don't want to go back to that. Zero, what have you done?
Or at least, I think its been ten years? Was that all a dream? Where are my rings? I am still wearing my old ones that Joel gave me. I need to figure this out, Nothing makes sense anymore.
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