Chapter 94: The Hunt For The Hellforge
I looked at the hellscape once more, silently noting that I was in an area I haven't been to before.
"You know, this place is starting to grow on me." I said.
{At this point it would grow on anyone.}
I was going to retort, but I was cut off by the impact of a fireball hitting the back of my head.
"And there goes any good opinions on this place." I growled, my face morphed into an annoyed glare.
{Died faster than your old garden.} The Gods commented.
"How do you even know about that?" I asked in a confused tone.
{Do you know us at all?} The Gods retorted.
I stepped to the side, anticipating the fireball the passed through my previous position.
"Right. Gods." I said. "I keep forgetting that due to you being you."
{We are us because we like to be us.} The Gods said.
"The hell does that even mean?" I asked annoyedly.
{Whatever we want it to.} They said helpfully.
I just decided to silently evict them.
{We heard that.}
"Heard what?"
I was confused about what they heard, as I heard nothing.
{That.}
Talon was still confused as to what they were talking about, so they simply decided to evict them now.
{Now it's in third per-} The Gods began.
I was still unsure of what the Gods were hearing. They ould have probably called it something weird like 'the narration' or something, and I doubt that's even a thing.
I sidestepped another fireball, still silently trying to guess what the Gods had heard.
"ah screw it." I said, deciding to just disregard the strange conversation.
I turned around to look at where the imp firing at me was and saw that it was angrily glaring at me.
'It's probably pissed off because I keep dodging its fireballs...'
It fired another fireball at me and I sidestepped it with ease, noting the angry imp getting even angrier.
I decided to use the strategy I used on the last imp, and simply flipped it off with a smug grin.
The imp immediately started screeching at me in anger.
'Too bad I kicked out the Gods...' I mused. 'I would've loved to hear what insult this one came up with.'
I watched as the flaming demon disappeared, and quickly looked around to see where it went.
The search did not last long, however. The imp was quite loud-mouthed, and the screeching was easy to pinpoint.
Based on what I was hearing, the imp was literally right behind me.
I turned around and decided to act out a dumb idea, which was punching the weird creature.
I reared my fist back and slammed my gauntlet into the face of the imp.
"Ow!" I exclaimed loudly, as the punch probably hurt me more than it did the imp.
I looked down at my gauntlet to see what damage had been done to it.
I was surprised to see the metal glove in pristine condition, but I immediately thought back to the meteorite encounter.
'Armor with auto repair. Right.' I thought matter-of-factly.
I quickly moved my attention away from the unblemished armor, opting to focus on the imp that was currently rolling on the ground with its face in its hands.
"You know, you're weaker than I thought you would be." I said to the imp, not expecting a response.
Life tends to contradict, sadly.
The imp decided to surprise me with a squawk that I could immediately translate to a pissed off "Hey!".
The imp quickly stopped rolling after my insult, and quickly got to its feet.
I stared at the imp with a bored gaze, and it simply replied with a very angry glare and a fireball.
I quickly stepped to the side of the fireball, simply responding with "Rude." To the aggressive action.
The imp simply glared at me harder, preparing another fireball.
I was tired of the annoying creature by this point, so I simply pulled out my sunfury and slammed the flail into its head.
The imp quickly died with the powerful strike to its head, and I walked past the corpse.
'Now if I were to find a hellforge, where would I look?' I thought to myself.
{Inside one of the buildings possibly.} The Gods said.
I jumped into the air in surprise, not expecting the deities to be back so soon. Or so abruptly.
They simply laughed at my reaction.
{We weren't expecting a reaction quite that amusing, if we are to be honest.}
"Yeah well I wasn't expecting you to be back in such an abrupt manner, you pricks." I grumbled.
{So are you going to take our advice and search the buildings?} They asked.
"Yeah, yeah, I'll look in those damned buildings." I muttered annoyedly.
{Your attitude took quite the one-eighty after we returned.} The Gods noted.
"Well it's not my fault I dislike jumpscares." I complained with a frown on my face.
The Gods just laughed at me like the insensitive pricks they are.
{We heard that!} The Gods shouted in my mind.
'Not this again.' I said mentally.
"Are you sure you're not hallucinating or something? You've been hearing voices for a while now."
{Well we're sorry for knowing how to break the fourth wall.}
I put my face in my hands.
"Of course you're breaking the fourth wall." I sighed.
I just continued walking, ignoring whatever the hell the Gods were doing.
{You can't ignore us that easily, you know!} The Gods said happily.
I sighed aggravatedly.
-several minutes later, inside of one of the obsidian buildings-
I sighed for the nth time today, slowly getting more and more fed up with the insane ramblings of the idiotic deities.
{-And that's why pineapple should never be on pizza.} The Gods finished.
That was the final thing the Gods needed to say to make me snap.
"Alright, can you shut the hell up now!? It's been almost twenty minutes and all you've been doing is rambling on about the positives of communism and contemplating the philosophy of pizza!? How does this have to do with anything even remotely knowledgeable you amalgamation of buffoons!?" I yelled, feeling angrier than I have ever been.
{Hey look there's a hellforge behind you!} The Gods said in an attempt to distract me.
I growled angrily and almost began to shout again, but I decided to listen to what the Gods said.
I turned around, and lo and behold, it's a hellforge sitting in the corner of the dark room I was in.
I would have been excited by the fact that I had found the one thing I was searching for, but any happiness the discovery found was quickly overwhelmed by the excessive amount of anger I hold towards the Gods at the moment.
And so I turned away from the object had been searching for in order to begin yelling at the idiotic deities.
-20 minutes later-
The Gods had been rendered speechless by my angry ranting.
{Wow.} They said incredulously. {We didn't even know that there were that many curses in the English language.}
I was out of breath from all the yelling i had just done, but I had more than enough energy to let out a very satisfied smirk.
"There aren't. I just improvised a few off the top of my head."
The Gods cleared their 'throat' and began speaking.
{Well, now that you're done screaming your head off, we recommend that you hightail it with that forge of yours.}
I tilted my head in confusion.
"Why."
{We hope that you get the reference, but 'you have alerted the horde'.} The Gods said.
My eyes widened at the sentence, realizing the urgency of the situation.
I grabbed my picks and punched a hold in the obsidian wall.
I looked outside to see several dozen flying demons heading in my direction.
It was at that moment that I agreed with the gods on the sentiment that I need to hightail it to the surface.
So I quickly grabbed the hellforge and pocketed it, moving to pull out my magic mirror.
{Well this was eventful.} The Gods commented.
I looked into the mirror and the last thing I saw in the underworld was an obsidian wall exploding in a flash of purple.
CREATORS' THOUGHTS 
Cold_Housefire
Cold_Housefire Well that was a chapter.
I hope you enjoyed it!
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