char: oh god, this chapter has actual effort, how long will it be?
Sakib: it depends on if I get lazy
Char: okaaa *char falls into a portal* AAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY *he comes out of another portal and crashes through the ground* here we go again, now where am I? wait, I'll just look at this world's history *he closes his eyes as a stronger tablet revealing information appears in his mind* a stone tablet, this must be a cultivation works let's see, blah blah blah, blah blah, oh, here's important information, titled "A ceremony"
(skip this part, I'll make a summary)
The ceremony had been hosted by the most sacred temple in the country. The king and all 108 Eastern nobles had come to pray for King Eastern Lu's beloved daughter. Everyone had commenced many preparations before the rites were held: forgoing meat, bathing, changing into fresh clothes, as well as burning lavender incense.
In other words - the attendees had cleaned up nicely. They were striving for perfection in order to convince the heavens of their sincerity, so that they might succeed in obtaining blessings.
Everything proceeded smoothly at first.
But just as the king and his nobles kowtowed on the temple steps in prayer, Jiang Chen emitted an earsplitting fart!
Kowtowing in prayer was the most important part of the entire ritual. Absolute silence needed to be maintained. This was how one communicated with the gods and demonstrated their devotion.
But Jiang Chen's fart rudely broke the silence and shattered the dignified gathering.
It was common knowledge that farts were comprised of unhealthy gas and were extremely unsound. If this had happened during a regular occasion, it would have been simply ignored as everyone else held their breath.
However, Jiang Chen's regrettable fart was smelly and long. It was an affront to the gods!
The high priest in charge of the rite's proceedings was appalled and cursed loudly, as if the fart had destroyed the pillar of the world and was causing the sky to cave in.
This aroused the great wrath of King Eastern Lu, as he doted on his beloved daughter, and he called for the guards to drag Jiang Chen away and beat him to death.
Even then, his anger wasn't abated. He ordered the boy's corpse hung on the city wall for vultures and scavengers to pick at. Jiang Chen wouldn't even have a body left if the other nobles hadn't persuade the king otherwise, pointing out that open display of a corpse was vulgar and uncivilized, and would adversely impact the kingdom's fortunes.
(this is from a novel called sovereign of the three realms, read it)
(and now it's summary time, and a bit of extra info)
Char: yikes, that brutal, but that's in the past, and as for the summary, dude farted during a ceremony, king got mad, dude got caned to death as dukes had to hold back the king, and for extra info the dude died but a guys soul entered his body, they both have the same name and new dude was the son of the most powerful guy in his past life but couldn't cultivate, he still lived for a long time because doting father, but cataclysm, also the dude basically knows everything, just not the future or full past, just pill recipes and sh*t like that, random teleportation time? I'll do it anyways
Char starts randomly teleporting everywhere in ZA WARUDO but only stays each place for one real second, he sees many creatures, such as a pheonix, a dragon, devine spirits and so on, even enters a few sects and gets attacked
????: Jiang Feng, don't you find it odd that your son has arisen from the dead? I suspect you were also involved in misleading his majesty. I petition His Majesty to thoroughly investigate the Jiang father and son. If I speak the truth, then the en *Char crashes into this guy while teleporting*
Char: ow, why do I feel like I've stepped on dog shit? *he realises he is sitting on top of a man who looks like the type of guy to make a whole bullshit piece of writing because he has no idea when to stop*
(a/n: wait a second, why do I f- nevermind)
a fatty is laughing loudly while a few other beings are also laughing slightly but some people are preparing to attack char
Char: what the absolute fuck have I gotten my ass into