Download App
91.44% Sweet Devil [BL] / Chapter 171: Nightmares PART I

Chapter 171: Nightmares PART I

Sandwiched between his little brother and Stephan, Jake didn't know whether to laugh or cry. He felt like he was cradling the devil in his arms while a pervert was molesting him from behind. Not exactly what he'd call a pleasant sensation.

To think that Jake had wanted to keep his distance from Tristan for the next few days and compose himself before facing him again… But, of course, the kid just had to pop up in his bedroom tonight. He thought of sending him back to his room, but when he looked at the boy's hopeful eyes, he couldn't muster the strength to kick him out. Before he could comprehend what he was doing, he had already yielded and opened his arms to welcome the kid. Tristan bolted to his chest and comfortably nestled against him, his childish giggles echoing within the room.

At least, one of them was happy.

Then, there was Stephan, who stuck to his back like a leech. Even when Jake pinched his wrists, the man didn't so much as flinch. No, he stubbornly wrapped his arms around his waist like an octopus. Jake tried to kick him and push him farther away, only for Stephan to laugh and whisper in his ear that he'd fall off the bed if he continued to wriggle like a worm. He was sticking to him because he didn't have a choice; that was all—no need to make a fuss.

Bullshit!

A thousand curses flew through his mind, and another thousand ways of disposing of a corpse flashed by. But this had the merit of distracting him from the kid in his arms. Although Jake had told the other Tristan that his little brother wasn't him, it was still hard not to think about what he went through in his past lives when the boy was hugging him. Even if it was his younger self, Tristan shared the same facial features as his tormentor. He had the same peach blossom eyes, chocolate iris, and fluffy, curly hair. Some faint freckles were slowly dawning on his pale skin, and the baby fat on his cheeks was disappearing at a speed visible to the naked eye. Bit by bit, he was growing up and looking more like his adolescent self.

Was it when his brother was fourteen that he started to wreck his life? Or was it when he was fifteen? Jake didn't remember well.

His mind was about to wander to the past when Jake felt warm, moist lips pressed against the nap of his neck. He froze, and the memories that had just surfaced were instantly buried back to where they had come from. Instead, he could not help but be reminded of how Stephan had been nibbling and gnawing on his neck earlier. This guy must have been a dog in another life, and one heck of a foolish dog.

"Stephan!" Jake growled lowly. "Behave, or I'm kicking you out!"

"What is he doing?" Tristan asked in a drowsy voice, his eyelids struggling to open. "Is he being mean to you?"

"No, he's just taking too much space." Jake was angered into laughing. "And I think a big, ugly bug is trying to bite my neck again. Maybe I should ask him to smash it for me?"

A faint chuckle resounded, and Jake glared at Gabriel's shadow over Tristan's head. He was definitely having fun at his expense. Instead of laughing, couldn't he do something about that best friend of his?! That guy was shameless enough to seize the opportunity to take advantage of him, his dirty paws all over his waist!

Jake felt his mouth twitch as he said, "How about we switch places, Gaby?"

"Sorry, but I'm quite comfortable where I am."

"I can switch places with you if you want!" Tristan suggested. "I'm small, but I can still protect you from bugs!"

'Oh child, please never change!' Jake silently sighed before hugging his little brother tighter. "It's fine. I think you scared the bug away before it could bite me. Let's just sleep."

As he talked his brother into sleeping, Jake elbowed Stephan in his ribs before twisting his neck to glare at the man. Yet, the moment he laid his eye on Stephan, he forgot what he was about to do, and his whole body stiffened.

The moonlight cast pale rays through the window, illuminating Stephan's face enough for Jake to catch a glimpse of the tender look softening his eyes. Only then did he realize Stephan had been purposely pestering him, throwing today's events at the back of his mind. He was so distracted by his antics that he didn't even shudder as he held his biggest fear in his arms.

Jake was suddenly all too aware of the warmth enveloping his back. He scoffed and let his head fall on the pillow. This time, he didn't complain when Stephan snuggled against him and held him tighter, closing his eye instead.

***

Faint snores echoed within the otherwise silent bedroom. Jake intently listened to the sound, thinking of a thousand things to keep himself awake. Tristan's cold, mocking words were still ringing in his mind, just like a curse, and he could not find it himself to ignore them.

"I wonder how often he wakes at night, crying and wailing."

What on earth did he mean by that? His little brother was always happily smiling in the morning, so how could he have been bawling his eyes out at night? Simply thinking about it seemed foolish. But what if, and only what if, these words hid a hint of truth?

Jake could not get these thoughts out of his head. His heart was unsettled, so why not pull an all-nighter to put his mind at ease? Whether Tristan's words were said only to mess up with him, he had nothing to lose by not sleeping for a night.

So, he waited, and time passed slowly.

At around midnight, the boy in his arms jolted. His breathing became ragged as small whines escaped his mouth. Jake lowered his gaze and saw tears glistening at the corners of the child's eyes; they were particularly striking under the moonlight. An expression of agonizing pain and fury contorted his delicate facial features into something hideous.

Was he having a nightmare….?

Tristan's eyelids twitched, his eyebrows knitted. Noticing he was about to wake up, Jake quickly closed his eye, pretending to be asleep. He clenched his jaw tight, fighting the urge to comfort the child. He had to wait and see what would unfold before doing anything. It wouldn't be too late to hug the boy afterward and soothe him with calming words.

A loud gasp left Tristan's mouth as he propped himself up like a lightning bolt. Not even a second later, Jake felt tiny hands probing around before stilling on his face. They lingered on his cheeks as Tristan pressed an ear to his chest, listening to his heartbeat. He stayed still in this position for a minute before heaving a sigh of relief.

"It's OK. Everything's OK," the childish voice said, cracking. "Brother is alright; he's not hurt. Everything's OK."

The shaky hands descended to grip Jake's shirt. Then, Tristan pressed his forehead against his chest and repeated weakly, "Brother is not hurt. He's not."

Muffled sobs followed. They were barely audible, but they reverberated like thunder in Jake's ears. The other Tristan's words hadn't been a lie. His little brother indeed woke in the middle of the night to cry. But why? He seemed to have dreamed of his older brother being hurt, almost frightening him into hyperventilating. Just how atrocious had his injuries been in his dream?

Before his brain could process what he was doing, Jake felt his arm move. He stroked his brother's back and asked softly, "Did you have a nightmare?"

As soon as he heard his voice, Tristan tensed. He was like a kitten who had been caught red-handed doing something it shouldn't, his whole body getting ready to sprint. Jake didn't know whether to laugh or cry. He thought he was being gentle, but his brother appeared to have been scared witless regardless. Was he really that bad at comforting people? It had always been his wife who consoled their children since he wasn't good with words, thanks to his horrible upbringing. So he honestly couldn't tell if he was doing this right.

"Don't worry," he said in a coaxing voice, "I'm here and in good health."

"You… you are?"

"Yes, I am," he repeated in a firm voice. Yet, Tristan was unconvinced. "If you don't believe me, do you want to verify if I'm injured anywhere?"

Tristan bit his lips before nodding. He peered at his brother's face and once again stretched his hands, touching every part of Jake's body he could reach. He tentatively patted his chest and arms as if afraid to hurt him, then peered at his empty eye. When Jake slept, he took off the eye patch and put it on the nightstand. Although Stephan carefully crafted it and made it as comfortable as possible, the strings were still annoying when he laid his head on the pillow, pulling at his hair.

"Does it hurt…?"

"No," Jake shook his head, understanding Tristan was talking about the empty eye socket. "It had long stopped hurting."

"And was it… was it very painful when, when…."

"What's with those questions? What did you dream about to be so scared?"

"I don't want to tell you. I don't want to remember it."

"But maybe if you told me about it, you would feel better?" Jake continued to coax, still stroking the kid's back. "Nightmares can haunt you for a long time. If you share them with me, I can help you see how absurd they are and how they could never be real." 

"Really?"

"Really."

And yet, when Tristan told him what he dreamed about, Jake could no longer say the dreams that plagued his nights could never, ever happen.

___________

Edited by Clozed! ♥

Discord: https://discord.gg/EGZhW9vKN8


CREATORS' THOUGHTS
RS_Vaesen RS_Vaesen

Me is dead like always TuT

Thank you for reading!!!!

Chapter 172: Nightmares PART II

Tristan was stumbling to find his words, opening his mouth only to close it afterward. Jake didn't rush the child and patiently waited as he gently stroked his back. He knew how hard it could be to share scary dreams with others. He, himself, never willingly disclosed them to anyone but his diary. He'd planned to carry them to his grave, but some people just had to dig out the skeletons in his closet and confront him about his past. Nightmares brought one's fears up to the surface, and talking about them was like baring yourself for all to see.

"This time, I—" Tristan stopped mid-sentence, pursing his lips. He buried his head in his brother's chest a bit more. His voice came out muffled as he continued, "I dreamed of that time you, Misha, and I were locked up."

A pang of searing pain coursed through Jake's body. After the kidnapping incident, Tristan behaved like always, almost as if it had never happened in the first place. Jake put this lack of reaction on his little brother's cold nature and didn't think much of it, but how could a child be alright after such a frightening incident? Again, Jake couldn't help but laugh at himself. Just how much had his trauma blinded him? The kid had only been pretending to be fine.

But before Jake could say anything to comfort him, Tristan went on.

"It's just that, in that dream, I'm not myself. It's like, I see everything from a third-person point of view. Or maybe I should say that I see everything from the masked man's point of view. I—" Tristan paused for a few seconds. He took a deep breath before carrying on, "I drag you by the arm through an empty corridor to another room. There's a blue plastic sheet on the floor and scalpels on a metal plate beside it. I look around and tell the men seated at a table to give us some private time before throwing you on the plastic sheet. You glare and scoff at me, saying that I have bad taste. And then, and then…."

The child's voice cracked, and the words that came out of his mouth turned into something akin to gibberish. The syllables were too broken to be understood, yet they echoed inside Jake's mind. It felt like cold water had been poured over his head, making him shiver from head to toe. He could scarcely believe his ears, but though shocked, he forced himself to speak and kiss his brother's forehead.

"It's OK, you don't need to say more. I got the gist of it."

The details were too close to reality to allow Jake to delude himself. This dream seemed to reflect the other Tristan's memory of when he gouged out his eye. He could not help but wonder if his little brother was affected by the presence of his older self. Perhaps. Two people existing simultaneously in the same timeline should never have happened. It was bound to create a conflict. This dream might be one of the many consequences that were to come.

"But," Tristan sniffled, "that's not even the worst part! There are thoughts flowing through my head, things I would never, ever think about! I'm finding your reactions interesting and funny! It's like I have absolutely no feelings. You're bleeding and crying, and I don't care! I'm just observing you and wondering why you suggested switching places with "your little brother" and why you're going through so much pain for him. I'm telling myself that you shouldn't have, that you should have been happy to watch "your little brother" get wrecked. After all, "your little brother" deserves it. I—"

Jake interrupted Tristan, cupping his cheeks to lift his face and look into his eyes. Then, in a firm yet gentle tone, he said, "These thoughts aren't yours. Please don't listen to them and don't let them sway you. It's the guilt that is talking, and never, ever think that you deserve to be hurt in my place. You haven't done anything wrong. And more than anything, I know you're not unfeeling. Aren't you crying right now, hm?"

Coaxing words flew out of Jake's mouth until Tristan calmed down. Finally, the sobbing subsided, and the child's heavy breathing steadied. Only then did Jake dare ask something that had been bothering him.

"I may poke where it hurts, but earlier, you said "this time". Does this kind of dream often happen?"

The kid's body, which had just relaxed, tensed again. He bit his lips but still nodded. His voice was barely audible as he confessed, "I have nightmares in which you get hurt almost every night. I don't remember when it started exactly. I know they weren't common at first, but they gradually began to haunt my nights more and more until they appeared every time I went to sleep. You're always bloody in those dreams. I stopped counting how many times people beat you up or how many times mom ridiculed you. Once, crickets were even shoved down your throat until you couldn't breathe and had to go to the hospital. And I was laughing in that dream…!"

Tristan choked up, and the tears he had barely managed to hold back trailed down his cheeks again, wetting his brother's hands. However, Jake barely registered the wet sensation. In fact, he almost burst out laughing out of derision. How could he have been so foolish? He wasn't special enough to be the only one plagued with the memories of his past lives. Why did he never think that his little brother, who shared his blood, would go through the same thing? The difference between them was that he was old enough to understand what those dreams and feelings meant but not Tristan. He was only a kid who loved and idolized his brothers. Yet, he had to see himself hurt Jake every night. And in those dreams, Gabriel didn't even exist, for he had long left the house.

Fears and uncertainties started to grip Jake's heart. Tristan was a child now, but he'd grow up soon enough. With the memories of his past lives, would he become the monster he knew so well? Jake could not help but think of the worst-case scenario, and he suddenly didn't know what to do, much less what to say to the kid crying in his arms.

Just as his thoughts were about to spiral out of control, Jake felt the soft caress of a thumb stroking his hip. The racing thoughts calmed down, and his rationality came back. Right, he wasn't alone right now. He had someone supporting him. Although this certain someone was an oddball, having him by his side was nonetheless reassuring.

Jake wasn't surprised that Stephan was awake. He was a light sleeper, and they hadn't exactly been quiet. Gabriel was the weird one, not waking up despite the ruckus they were causing.

Until now, Stephan had been kind enough to pretend to be asleep. He only made himself known when Jake lost control, gently reminding him that things were different from his past lives. For starters, wasn't he here?

"…Why are you always getting hurt in my dreams?" Tristan sobbed harder. "I don't want you to be hurt! I want to protect you! So why am I always hurting you in my dreams?!"

Having snapped out of his daze, Jake could hear his brother's voice again. And then, realization struck him. Tristan wasn't being childish when he demanded to sleep with his brothers; he wanted to see them and make sure Gabriel wasn't gone and Jake wasn't hurt after waking up in the middle of the night. It was hard to differentiate these dreams from reality, and Tristan needed to find his brothers by his side as he woke to alleviate the anxiety. Jake had almost gone crazy at one point, having no one to rely on while facing his past. It was no wonder the child clung to them.

"Tristan, these dreams are only nightmares," Jake said. He took a second to push aside the nagging voice in his mind and added, "they won't ever happen in real life. I know you will never hurt me."

The boy sniffled and let out a sound of agreement. Jake then hugged his little brother, pressing his head in the crook of his neck. He lulled him to sleep, just as he often did with his children after a bad dream.

While humming a soothing song, a cold light flashed in Jake's green eye. The other Tristan had said to bring his younger self to the hospital in his teen years, or he feared he'd end up like him. Jake didn't know what he meant by that and honestly didn't trust the man, but if there were a chance, no matter how small, that his Tristan would stay as lovable as he currently was, he would seize it. Unbeknownst to him, this cute, clingy little brother had wormed his way into his heart at one point, and he did not want to lose him.

_______________________

Edited by Clozed! ♥

Discord here: https://discord.gg/EGZhW9vKN8


CREATORS' THOUGHTS
RS_Vaesen RS_Vaesen

Hi guys, I’m aliiiiive! Barely, but still alive! Anyway, I went through one hell of a shitty situation these past few months. I had to quit my new job (thanks harassment) and leave my house on the spot (thanks to roommate who developed schizophrenia and was having hallucinations about me, super great). Luckily, a friend agreed to take me in with my lovely ferrets, and then I found a new job (but it’s the kinda job where you work 12 hours a day most of the time and often seven days a week, so finding time to write is darn hard). I can’t promise to update frequently, but I’ll do my best to find time to write. Thank you for your continued support, and yes, I’m definitely gonna write a book about the shit that went down in my life. It’s too novel-like not to! The good thing about “bad events” is that they spark my creative mind! 8D

Load failed, please RETRY

Weekly Power Status

Batch unlock chapters

Table of Contents

Display Options

Background

Font

Size

Chapter comments

Write a review Reading Status: C171
Fail to post. Please try again
  • Writing Quality
  • Stability of Updates
  • Story Development
  • Character Design
  • World Background

The total score 0.0

Review posted successfully! Read more reviews
Vote with Power Stone
Rank 200+ Power Ranking
Stone 196 Power Stone
Report inappropriate content
error Tip

Report abuse

Paragraph comments

Login

tip Paragraph comment

Paragraph comment feature is now on the Web! Move mouse over any paragraph and click the icon to add your comment.

Also, you can always turn it off/on in Settings.

GOT IT