"Do You Love Me?"
A soft knock on the door brought her attention towards the other end of the room. The door slowly opened and a soft light filtered inside the room. Angela tried to shield her eyes afraid she might hurt her eyes from the sudden glare but the soft light did not blind her as she originally thought.
"Are you up?" It was Edward coming to see her.
"Yes." She answered briefly.
"Perfect. Dinner is ready."
"I was looking for a private time with you to talk." She hinted that she had her plans laid out for the baby.
"Me too, but as it is, dinner is ready and I hate to keep grandma waiting."
"Oh, she is joining us?" Angela was surprised that the old woman was joining them. Was it so late for her to be up and about?
"Yes she is and she is already at the dining table."
Angela felt embarrassed at being late for meal. Had she known that they were joining dinner, she would have gone out herself. Hurriedly, she slipped out of the bed covers and got out of bed. She tried to fix her hair as best she could. She straightened her wrinkled clothes and went out with Edward.
"I hope I don't look amiss. I can't fix myself better as I don't have anything with me." She apologized to Edward.
"Don't worry, grandma is not a fashionista." He smiled at her assuring her that her looks didn't matter.
Everyone was already at the table when they arrived. She was impressed when she saw everyone present even the maids and hired helps were there waiting for her patiently. The long table was lavishly laid with various offerings of food. Angela hoped she won't make a scene herself. Or it would be such a shame.
Once she settled in her seat with Edward's assistance, the grace for the meal was said. Together, they feasted on all manners of food offerings on the table. Angela was surprised she was no longer nauseated with the smell of food. She enjoyed every dish until she was full.
After the sumptuous dinner, the plates were removed from the table. Angela observed no one left their chairs. She was tempted to ask Edward of what they were waiting but then she wanted to see it herself. They chatted just almost about anything.
Angela whispered to Edward that she wanted to go out for a walk. Edward gracefully excused from the table taking Angela with him. Together they went to the garden. The cold evening breeze kissed her face lightly. The sudden drop of temperature made her shiver.
"Are you cold? I must have brought some wrap for you." Edward was now concern for her safety.
"I'm fine. I just wanted to stay out here for a little while." Angela assured him.
A moment of silence fell upon them as each contemplated their situation. Angela looked up to see the white patches of cottony clouds against the black backdrop of the night sky with dots of tiny stars sparkling like diamonds. Angela closed her eyes feeling the warmth of Edward's arms around her keeping her warm.
"Thank you." She murmured.
"I am really glad for this baby you know." He told her gently rubbing her icy cold skin.
Angela could not say anything. She was thinking of having the baby aborted while Edward was so happy about it. What a contradiction. The two of them had always been in contradiction with each other. Slowly Angela let out a sigh.
"Are you not happy with the baby?" Edward asked her finally sensing a different vibration coming from her.
"I'm terrified." She simply replied flatly.
"We both are. But my fear is nothing compared to how happy I am for knowing that I'm going to be a daddy."
Another silent moment from Angela.
"I think I am already feeling cold. Let's get inside." Angela turned away from Edward's warmth. But he was quick to stop her from her tracks.
"Are you planning on aborting the baby?" He read through her mind.
She stood there quietly. There were no words formed in her mouth to describe how afraid she was right now.
"I'll tell you what I wanted tomorrow." She then freed her arm from his grasp and walked away.
On her way inside, she saw Manny wheeled Helen into the parlor. A group of women was already sitting on the chairs inside. Angela passed by the door without turning to look.
"Having a fight with Edward?" Helen asked.
Taken aback, Angela stopped. She turned to face Helen. "No. What makes you think we had a fight?"
"You came in a hurry like someone was after you. You came out with Edward and came in without him in a hurry. I know dear. I have been married once." Helen smiled encouraging her to open up.
She smiled sweetly at the old lady. "Oh, it's just nothing. Please excuse me I need to freshen up."
"I have laid out few things on your bed so you can change into something comfortable. I hope it fits. I was a little thinner when I was your age." Helen informed her.
"Thank you."
Before she could leave, Edward came in. His face was a mask of indifference.
"Attend to your wife." Helen ordered him.
"Of course grandma." Edward went to escort her back to the room she was assigned to use.
"I can take care for myself. Please leave." Angela tried to put as much distance from Edward as possible. She doesn't need him right now or ever, so she told herself.
"I am sleeping here whether you like it or not. We are married Angela."
"We are divorced Edward. You are not my husband anymore and this child is my problem not yours!" She suddenly blurted out.
He looked at her. His face is a picture of frustration. "I am your husband Angela. When will you learn to accept that? I fathered this child and by God I will fulfil my responsibilities and obligations to him!" He seethed angrily.
"Have you forgotten about out divorce?" Angela pointed out the truth.
"I haven't. But that doesn't mean I cannot marry you anytime we both wanted. If you are so afraid about the future of this child, I will assure you that I will do everything within my power to see to it that his every need is being meet and his welfare is of my utmost priority."
"I will not marry you!" Angela blurted with finality.
He looked at her like she had just lost her mind. "You already had!"
Nose flaring, each of them looked to the other warily. They were both lost in their own anger and frustration.
"I regretted the day I married you." Angela cried agonizingly.
Edward came and hugged her as her tears welled in her eyes. "I know honey. But if you only let me in and know me more, you would know that I am not a horrible man to be a husband."
Angela sobbed in sorrow for all the pain she endured while being with him. She burst into wails filled with deep anguish as memories of all her pain came flooding in. Edward rubbed her back soothing her pain. Each stroke breaking every wall she built to hide away from him. Each stroke is mending her pain.
"I did not love Erin. Not one bit. Believe me. I should have married her if I have." Edward opened up an old wound. Angela pushed away from him but Edward kept her in his embrace not wanting to let her go without settling his score.
"The day you came to see me at the hotel, the day before you filed the divorced, was the day we were on a conference. Erin was there. You saw her. But she was not with me. She escorted one of my men. It so happened that we were in one suite as a group. You can check my story to anyone if you like."
Angela wanted to believe him but there is still a shadow of doubt in her heart.
"I cannot bring myself to explain to you when you are so desperate to believe something as your truth. I simply cannot take that away from you." Edward continued to explain.
"You should have called." She told him between sobs.
"I should if only my phone was not lost. That day, my phone got lost. I regret not memorizing your number. So when your call came through, it became unregistered. I had a trip to the telephone company the day before to get me a new SIM to replace the old one with the same number so you can still contact me. I have been waiting for your call."
Angel was so close to believing him. "Why did Erin answered your phone?"
"I was in the shower when your call came through. She happened to be there so I asked her to check who was calling. But you dropped the call before I could answer."
She turned and looked at him. "You hurt me so many times"
"I know and I am sorry." He cupped her face with his hands. "Let's start over."
"I can't"
"Even if I will beg you with my life?"
"Even if….."
"Why?"
Angela looked into his eyes. Her sorrow showing. "Because you don't love me!"
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