"…"
"…"
"…"
"…"
I'm greeted by silence the moment I step outside of the washroom.
All four of us are completely, totally, irrefutably quiet right now.
I don't…
I just don't understand how it came to this.
Why?
Is this some kind of sick joke? A prank? I… I don't…
"… This, is our plan."
"Like HELL it's your plan!"
I throw the bag at Nick's face.
"Why the hell are you making me wear women's clothes?!"
I want to die.
I want to crawl in a hole and die right now.
These guys…
Just what the hell is going on here?!
"When they told me you were in there changing into girls clothes I thought I'd be able to laugh but… you pull it off so well that I'm kind of depressed."
"S-shut up, Scarlet!"
What does she mean 'pull it off well'?! This is embarrassing!
"I-I'm serious, though… I don't think I understand how gender works anymore…"
Oh my god, what the hell are these three making me do?!
When I opened up the bag, I found an assortment of items including a wig, a pair of fake glasses, and a skirt, to name a just a few.
When I tried to leave the washroom, Sig and Nick held the door down and told me they wouldn't let me out until I put everything on.
Talk about bullying…
"Here, I'll do your make-up so just sit down."
Make-up…
I'm losing my goddamned mind over here and you're over here talking about make-up?!
This is so ridiculous…
But despite how conflicted I am about all of this, I reluctantly walk out and take a seat next to Scarlet, who starts going through her bag for her make-up.
"Sig… I think I'm in love."
Get me out of this room.
"Well, he isn't as cute as Momo-chan is, but I think I can give him a solid 8. Definitely cuter than most of the kuso normies at this school."
Please stop… It's not funny, it's just… wait.
Am I blushing?!
What the hell is going on?! I'm a guy!!! That kind of compliment shouldn't make me happy!"
"In the first place, why do I even have to cross-dress for this mission?! Wouldn't a normal disguise work?!"
"Well, no. You're disguising yourself as Leyla's assistant who's going to interview Jen in Leyla's stead, so it had to be like this."
"What? Leyla doesn't have an assistant, does she? Why would I need to disguise as a girl if I'm disguising myself as someone who doesn't exist?"
"Because I say so."
Nick, I get the feeling that you've been planning this for a while….
"Well, don't beat yourself up over it Chase. I think it could work. Ah, don't move."
Scarlet warns me then starts applying her make up to my face.
"Just don't talk like such a huge nerd or you'll throw her off. Oh, and speak in a higher pitch so she doesn't suspect anything."
"L-like so?"
"Ugh…"
"W-what? Was that bad?"
"No, I just really hate how cute you are like this…"
"I'm still a guy, you know…"
"Hey Scar-san, can you take some pictures of us with the new Chase?"
"Sure."
"Don't go along with it! No one's taking any pictures of me!"
"Haaa, you're such a spoil-sport man. Still, Chase doesn't really cut it here. We need to name the character he'll be roleplaying as today."
Get. Me. Out.
"You're right, Nick-kun. Hmm… Let's call her Saber."
"Rejected. Too unoriginal. How about Amy?"
"Ehh, too English. Maybe Yui?"
"Too weeb. We need something near the middle."
"…"
"…"
""Beatrice.""
They say it in unison.
"W-why Beatrice?"
"If you don't get it then it's fine. In any case, Beatrice's job will be to get a fake interview out of Thotifer in order to extract the details of her campaign. And then like magic, she disappears from the world. Thotifer will have no interview up on the Newspaper club's social media pages, and we'll have the information about her campaign in our pockets without her knowing."
Wow, that's actually… kinda brilliant.
"So I just need to pretend to interview her and write down all of her campaign details?"
"Nah, you can just use my phone to record it. I'll show you how when Scarlet's done with you."
"I-I see."
Now I get why we needed to skip the last period. This plan requires a lot of prep time to work.
In the first place, we need to intercept both Leyla and Jennifer before either of them sees the other.
"Wait, where will the interviews happen?"
"Uhh, we can get Scar-san to bring Leyla here, but you'll need to lead Jennifer-chan to the Newspaper clubroom without her seeing either of them."
"Huh…"
That sounds rough. The rooms are in the exact same hallway.
"Don't worry about it, Beatrice. Your faithful furniture will do all of the directing. You just need to focus on the interview itself."
"Furniture..? What are you even talking about anymore?"
"Done!"
Scarlet steps away from my face and packs her stuff into her bag.
"I think I did a pretty good job! What do you two think?'
"…"
"…"
They're both speechless.
Uh oh… Is it that bad?
Maybe it is.
I mean, Nick just dropped to his knees in shock.
Wait, why is he grabbing my hands?
"Marry me."
"DUDE!"
"Ah, wait, crap. Sorry man. The make-up honestly makes you look like an angel. Right Sig?"
"Just Momoka… Just Momoka… Just Momoka… Just Momoka…"
"Man, who cares about that? Just enjoy Beatrice while she's still around. Momoka doesn't have to know."
"U-uh, you guys know I'm still Chase, right? Beatrice doesn't actually exist…"
"Shut up, man! Beatrice exists! Look! She's right here!"
I have no idea what to think of anything anymore.
"No, I think you should look at this."
Scarlet opens up her hand mirror and lets me take a look.
"…"
"…"
I blush.
"N-nevermind, I get it. Just put it away already."
I think I'd fall for it too if I saw Beatrice walking through the halls.
Why on earth do I make such a cute girl, exactly…?
"You should take the glasses off though, Beatrice-san. Nick-kun only put those in there for his stupid fetish."
"Dude, I created her. Obviously she wears whatever I want her to wear. And I say Beatrice is a bashful bespectacled beauty."
"Oh whatever. You're still just a kuso rp-geek with shit taste in women. You just lucked out because Chase makes a good trap."
"Shut up, you dumbass weeb! If I left it up to you he'd be wearing a kimono or something and he'd get called out instantly."
Before Sig could respond, the sound of the school bell reverberates throughout the school, signaling the end of the final class.
Anxiety suddenly fills my chest.
I'm really going to have to do this, huh?
"Chase, Jen had biology in room 210, you need to beeline it for that class room ASAP."
"It's not Chase, Scar-chan! It's Beatrice!"
Oh for the love of…
"Oh, and here Beatrice."
Nick hands me the phone.
"I removed the password lock so all you need to do is swipe then hit the record button when you're ready."
"O-okay. Thanks guys. I'll head over now, let me just grab something I left in the washroom."
Once I'm done retrieving the item, I hurry straight for the door.
"Okay, I'm counting on you guys. TNT!"
""TNT!""
The mission begins.