Chapter 1: chapter 1- eating is fun
whoever does not derive pleasure from eating???? it's one of the simple pleasures of life! i personally really love eating,.... which , some people say; explains why i am big sized,.... i wasn't always fat,... but because my general metabolism is slow, i was always chasing a disillussioned train to look perfect and slim.... i never liked how i really looked,.... i felt like the inside of me should look prettier on the outside. how bout you???? do you share the same feelings like i do????
but, let's think; who made us think that we have to look super thin and tall???? is it a culture that we share worldwide???? i've come to think the answer is yes,....
basically, we associate thinness to be healthy and fatness to be unhealthy and to be avoided at all cost. i personally feel we should allow ourselves to look however we choose,... to not be so afraid of anything,... in short, that means we should explore being fat at least once in life,.... never force ourselves, neither striving hard to be fat,....
it is a simple thing to be fat, you just need to eat more than you normally do and exercise less,....
it is nice to be a different figure than we are used to. it helps us understand the world from a different perspective. for example, did you know that being fatter makes you take more space around you???? it can make you more comfortable to be yourself and more confident cos you take up extra space and have a bigger presence,.... however, the drawback of taking up more space shows its ugly head in regards to sitting space in the car. some might feel a bit guilty for this reason..... however, it just needs a thicker skin to get used to.... alternatively, fat people should sit in front.... that is quite a nice arrangement for me most of the time,....
in gist, i don't want to be fat anymore,... i want to be slim and pretty, just like my model-role models, miranda kerr and gigi hadid. but i have taken back lots of wisdom and courage from this fat experience. i am no longer scared.... i am no longer cold. i am no longer in pain. my blood pressure is now normal and stabilised.... and my long battle with schizophrenia is ending...
but i have no one to blame for being fat.... although my dad had a hard time accepting that i wanted to be fatter,.... my sister was worried that i would become diabetic,... i took the health test and the results said that i was fine,.... i have been 80kg for many years,.... maybe more than 6 years, but i can't be sure....
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