Chapter 1: We are Bound for a Reason
Tak!*
A chess piece, the queen was placed calmly onto the black square in front of the king piece.
"Checkmate...", a figure who has no figure said without a sound but was instantly understood by Than(Tan) who was sitting opposite, "Why do you want to play this with me? You know that you will never defeat me."
Than was staring calmly at the surreal figure in front of him. It was like he was in a dream but he was very conscious, "It's not that I hoped anything like that."
The two was playing on a reflective floor like a sea but still, reflecting the blue sky with calm clouds passing by. Except for the chess pieces and chessboard on top of the table, the chairs, and the two that were playing, there was nothing else on the surface of this boundless land.
"So... why did you want to play it?", the voice had no emotion since there was no sound. It can not be any different than Than having hallucinations. Time doesn't exist in that place. The conversation they were having was just happening in their memories. Than just knew and sure that he was understanding everything the figure without a figure in front of him said when he tried to remember it like it was naturally there.
"First of all, why did you bring me here without any memories? I could only remember my name which is Than.", he said filled with curiosity.
Than knew that the figure looked and smiled at him but he doesn't have proof.
"I just want to have a simple conversation with you."
"You are the only creature I created whose mind was confusing even to me. You, who is a human that has a human's brain intrigue me."
The voice was not loud since it has no sound but it was not quiet either.
"What does that mean? And how does that relate to me having no memories."
"Because... in the end, you are just still a human."
That sentence made everything sense. Than should be a normal human living a normal life. He has his memories and experiences he got in his life which made him who he is. However, this figure only wanted to know what is inside his head. If he retained his memories from the start, he's surely will not act as calm as he is now.
"Then, what is it about me that intrigued you?"
"You know, your questions are a little too late now but, you intrigue me because you thought of things that even I do not understand..... Do you know what that means?"
"Are you God?"
"Yes..."
"A human thought that God couldn't understand???", Than was confused, "Aren't you omnipotent and omniscient, and.... everything?"
"Yes... and no. You, humans, haven't invented a word that can describe me but if you ask if I'm all-powerful and all-knowing, then yes but it is not that simple."
"Just all-knowing is enough.... then why? What is it that you don't understand?", Than had no memories but he still remembers everything since he was in here, "Ah, is it the thing you asked me before?"
Even though he only saw nothingness in front of him, he knew that God nodded while he looked at it like there was something there.
"Being God isn't fun at all?"
"Yes, I did ask you why being God isn't fun when you said that we should play chess."
".....", Than was silent and pondered for a moment, there was nothing that humans could call time in here. That moment became instant. To further understand it: think of a video editor software. In there, there was the timetable. However, there is no beginning and end. It is up to you where to create the beginning, place an existing video and play it. There is it, it existed in the middle of nothingness that has no beginning and end. You can just click anywhere and you will go whenever.
"Do you understand what fun is?", Than questioned even though it is absurd and impolite. However, God did not mind and answered;
"Of course."
"Aren't you all-knowing? Then don't you already know the outcome of this conversation even before anything existed?"
God laughed, "You are not the only person who I know that would question me like that but you are the only person that I do not understand... You see, I didn't predict everything in this conversation. I am quite delighted by it."
"You can feel emotion?"
"Yes, although I did not set myself in a human standard, I chose to feel it. I can make myself laugh for millenniums and never stop but it seemed pointless."
"Hmm....", Than thought and nodded, "Let's play another round.", the chess pieces that was rumbled before came back to their places in an instant as if it was not played earlier and as if it was like that since the very beginning.
Than naturally moved the white piece first. However, God didn't expect his move: the pawn stepped forward three blocks.
"Why? I am sure that you know the rules.", this is one of the fewest times where God asked sincerely.
"Your turn...", Than didn't explain anything.
God, however, chose to move the left horse piece.
Than also moved the horse piece but the move was longer than what it should.
God didn't know what Than was up to but that was why God was letting him do that.
"God, are you playing like a supercomputer where every move that I make can be counteref and make you win?"
"No, but I know everything that even if you cheat, I can still win.", God moved a pawn one stel.
"No, I don't think you can.", right after Than said that he felt the stare of the figureless God but still moved a piece, the queen. The queen jumped over the pawn and ate the black pawn diagonal to the king while being protected by the white pawn he first moved.
"Do you think I can't cheat too?", the black pawn ate the queen beside it, horizontally.
"No, I know that you can cheat but I still win.", the white pawn directly ate the black king, "I.... win."
".....", God was silent.
"I cheated, that is why I won.", Than followed.
"Yes, but even if you cheated, even if you directly eat my king with any piece of yours, I was sure that I would win...", God didn't understand.
"It is because you said that you can't predict every move I make so I directly ate your king by cheating, hoping you wouldn't predict that. If you did then you would stop me which is another form of cheat."
"I too, cheated, making it fair... so, I lose..", God whispered, "I never thought that I would say that.", even He, saw it as unbelievable. It was the very first that God was stupefied. He knew everything and there is nothing that would make him feel that way until now, "So, what is that all about?"
"I won because I cheated and I cheated because I didn't follow the rules.", Than said slowly, "God, do you think that being free and not bound to anything is good?"
"That... is a matter of opinion."
"Well, I think that it is not. It is great to be able to do anything and all but once you've experienced it, everything changes.", Than stared at nothingness, " Do you think you had fun until now?"
".....", silent answered until, "Didn't I say that I can make myself laugh until the end of time comes? Then you should know that I can have fun for the rest of my days which us infinite."
"Are you sure about that?", Than pointed his finger into the nothingness. If anybody heard his question to the God they would think that he is crazy, "I mean, did you have fun, you..."
God virtually squinted His eyes, "What do you mean by that?"
"God", Than put down his finger and just stared, "Do you have a self? You are God but you are not you because you see everything in God's eyes, you know everything in God's knowledge and wisdom, in short, you don't have your own point of view since you see everything!"
"Then what do you think 'self' mean?", God asked but answered it, "Is it 'you' that experienced life?"
Than for a moment was still but soon nodded.
"You know, I have a life."
"Yes, but it's a meaningless one."
"What do you mean?", the voice without sound was quiet and calm but Than knew that God was a bit angered like something embedded it to his head.
"God, why won't you take a form?"
"Because it is meaningless. As long as we understand each other then it is fine."
"Then if you take a form, what is it?"
".... It depends on what I would take my form in front of. As of now, I took the form of what you thought that I would be. You humans wouldn't grasp everything that I do."
"Then what form do you like?"
"As I said, I don't have an opinion...", realization struck God, "So that is what you meant. It is so simple yet I didn't know it. Boy, you just made me, God, think on what you call an existential crisis."
"Yes, it is because you don't have a self even if you are living life because that life was meaningless to begin with. Do you think you that chess is meaningful if it doesn't have rules, in a sense, do you think life is meaningful if you don't have rules to follow."
"You compared life to a game?"
"If you think about it, what is it that can't be called a game?"
"...."
"God, what I am saying is that your life has no rules! In short, you are a cheater. A cheater that made everything meaningless to anyone."
"So, you are saying that I should be bound to rules to have a life?", God paused for a moment before whispering, "You mean, it is not that I don't understand it even though I'm God but I don't understand it because I'm God."
Than felt that God looked at him in the eyes, he breathed in and continued, "Being free without restraint, without rules doesn't necessarily mean good but can only create chaos."
"....", God was silent for a while, "Is that your opinion?"
"Yes", Than closed his eyes.
The table and everything on top of it including the chess pieces showing the defeat of God instantly vanished like a puff of smoke.
"Boy, want to be a God for a second?", a figure emerged in front of Than, with His back facing Than. This figure wore white clothes, staring at the boundless horizon.
"A second?"
"I want to try having a life like you humans do but I know that if I stepped down my Godhood then everything would collapsed.", this time, a voice with sound came out of this figure in white, pressing the word "everything", he then continued, "But if there is a temporary substitute, then everything is fine."
"...."
God continued, "Don't worry, once you've become a God, you will understand everything and a whole human's lifetime will be just instant."
"You trust me?"
"No, but once you become a God and understand everything, there is no need to trust you."
It didn't take a while before Than nodded. it wasn't out of greed.
"Hehe, thanks... well, then. You'll become a God from now on...", the voice echoed as the wind swept everything away, everything including the sky, the reflective floor, God, and Than.
..........
A cry of a baby resounded in a room while the baby who created that sound was in the nurse's embrace.
The nurse walked to the white bed where a weak mother lied there in happiness as she looked at her baby.
The nurse gently gave the baby to the weak mother and the weak mother with a pale face but with a happy smile looked at the baby.
A man walked beside her, he seemed to be the father. He was also filled with happiness, "What name would you give him?", the man softly asked.
"I think.... I will name him what we've already decided...", the mother weakly said, " Isn't that right, Than?"
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