Chapter 3: (3) SURPRISE SURPRISE
When Ira lifted up his hands to protect his head (you know, that cliche motion people do when something flies at them), he was met with nothing but air. He looked up and the tree was suspended in front of his face (tooooootally not a cliche picked up from every form of entertainment ever made). Ira stepped back a few feet and put his hands down, and the tree fell. A teacher came running up to him.
"Sorry about that. A couple of hooligans were messing with their Majick, long story short, they uprooted a tree." He reached a hand out to help Ira up off the ground. "Oh, by the way, I'm Professor Marseilles, pronounced, mar-SAIL, spelled like the city in France. I'm going to be your History of the White and Black Arts teacher. But you'll figure that out at the opening which starts in exactlyyyyyyyy *glances at watch* 1 minute 26 seconds, so you should really get to the front doors."
Ira just stared. A teacher just said all that? What did he say? How could he talk so fast? He shook it off and ran over to the front doors of the school, taking a quick glance back and seeing a new figure next to the teacher, a bald, brawny man, who looked sliiiightly chubby. He blinked and the dude was gone. Must've been his imagination.
At the top of the steps were a few figures which he guessed were the principal and vice principal. There were also other people, just regular members of the staff, that were doing things like holding the banners in the air, setting up the microphone and speakers, et cetera. He still had 48 seconds, so he pulled out one of his books and began to read.
..And if he had another reason, a tall, lanky reason with too-strong taste for games of risk-
"Alright, students! You guys are all the new first years here at the Majick Place, a place for those who are trying to learn Majick, yada yada, so on and so forth. We are an elite school, so we expect the most elite students. You must be smarter, more endurant, this school is NOT for the fainthearted. So, a little word of wisdom: this place is 100% clutch or kick!" There was an intense look on his face, his voice sounded gruff, like an army commander. And then-
"And now that that's settled with, we will introduce you to our teachers and staff and then explain the classes (^w^)!" There was then no more intensity. The man suddenly looked like a little girl playing with Barboes. You have to admit, this school is pretty friggin' strange. A different teacher --- the one that talked to Ira earlier --- stepped up to the podium and began speaking, much slower than earlier.
"Thank you, Mr. Bartlett. As I just said, the person who gave you such a... KIND introduction is Jax Bartlett, he will be your choir/band director and your coach, as well as any other electives you may think of. You may call him either Coach Bartlett or Mr. Bartlett." Choir? In a Majick School? Well, I guess it does have to be a little bit like a normal school. Ira was contemplating the concept of using Majick in choir and how that would work when the teacher began speaking again. I am Jae Marseilles, your History of the Black and White Arts teacher. I also teach the regular school courses, but those don't really matter as much as Majick History. Please call me Prof. Jae, or Prof. Marseilles. And finally, your most important teacher." The tall, skinny man started waving towards an empty bush. About 20 seconds and a tumbleweed passed, and Ira was starting to question the Professor's sanity when a small fox came out from behind the bush.
It had some kind of mysterious mask on its face that made it look slightly like a mummy. Prof. Jae scooped it up into his arms a bit enthusiastically and began petting it before it squeezed narrowly out of his grip and- transformed? The fox that was on the hard stone steps a few seconds ago was now replace by a white column of light that expanded a bit before dying down and revealing a tall woman standing in its place. She had a shawl wrapped around her and a scarf covering her from her neck to her nose. She had glasses with some kind of design on them hovering on her nose, which was more of a Greek nose than an American nose. Very bulbous, taking up almost all the space between her eyes and nose. She was very nimble, very graceful in the way she walked to the podium, the way her hips had a slight sway to them, even as she shoved Professor Marseilles out of the way. Was she some kind of supreme being?
Ira stood there, admiring her. He wasn't looking at her lustfully, so much as he was enviously. He was jealous how her hips moved left and right perfectly, how she had all the right curves a man would want. But one thing she didn't have nearly as much of as Ira was *ahem* "dat ass." There was nobody with a rear as big as Ira's-
*COUGH COUGH* Now, forget the last paragraph you just read and continue paying attention to the story. After a few seconds of the woman just standing there, everyone in the courtyard heard a thought inside their heads. Simultaneously everyone reacted, turning around, murmuring to others, "Hey, did you say something?" Ira just stood there thinking, 'Wow, I really must be going crazy. And apparently more feminine by the minute.' And then everyone heard it again.
'Oh, relax everyone. It's only me. Look at the front of the yard, at the podium. That's right, toward the woman so many of you are picturing naked. Oh God, that's disgusting.' The teacher at the front of the room doubled over and put her fist up to her mouth---or where everyone assumes her mouth is---as if she was sick. When she was okay, she began to speak again, if it even was speaking. 'Well. That was... unpleasant. Now, I am Dox, your Basic Majick teacher. As I just said, I will be teaching you all about Majick, and yes, we will be practicing it too. I will teach you all the elements of the Black Arts, the different types of Majick of the White Arts, and even the Forbidden Arts and how to counter them. If you are wondering how I am communicating with you, I am a specialist in the White Arts of the Brain. And that means I do not need to speak to communicate. I can also read any thoughts if you do not block your mind, and most of you don't have enough knowledge to do so. I am not surprised, as it is an advanced Majick...' She looked at Ira with a blank expression in her eyes. There was a pause before she began to think to everyone again.
'Now that the introductions are over, it is time to sign up for your electives and after-school activities. The sign-up stations are right inside and to the right. After that, you must find your dorm number and do what you want before curfew at 10 o'clock. Remember to read before you sign. You want to know what you're signing yourself into. Now, go get settled in, students. Chop, chop!'
The students began spreading out a bit, walking into the school itself. Ira followed suit, and as soon as he stepped foot in the building, he was struck with awe. And a hand. He looked to where the smack came from and then heard yelling. " 'Ey, wha' a' you doin'?! The sign-up is tha' way, ya domb ije'!" The man had a heavy British, so heavy, Ira almost couldn't understand him. The man, a tall, skinny lad about the age of 20. His shirt had a name-tag that said "Hello my name is Jeremiah." He must have been an employee, because there was a beam of light that came from his hand up to the huge door, propping it open.
"Oh, I apologize, sir. Thank you for not letting me get lost."
"You' we'come. Iss moy job."
Something felt off about this character. Ira felt some kind of bad vibes coming from this guy, almost like how hippies feel bad vibes from criminals. He shook it off and walked down the halls to the sign-up stations. He signed up for band (playing piano), tennis, AP Math, AP Science, AP ELA, and AP Social Studies.
Ira was examining the intricate patterns on thE WALLS OF THE mAJICK pLACE ON HIS WAY TO HIS huuuuuuuuuuge DORM ROOM. tHERE WERE A FEW OTHER BOYS IN THERE, BUT HE DIDN'T REALLY CARE. hE CLOSED HIS EYES AND WENT TO SLEEP, THINKING, 'tHIS IS GOING TO BE WHEN MY LIFE FINALLY CHANGES.' aND HE WAS RIGHT. hiS LIFE WAS ABOUT TO CHANGE.
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Hey there peeps. I am very sorry about the Caps Lock. It was touched on the computer while I was trying to type "A" (I believe) and I did not notice it until a few seconds ago. And I just don't feel like fixing it. If you guys DO want it fixed, though, I will, but for now, it is ginna stay messed up. I hope you guys enjoy the chapter. It may take a few months for the next chapter, as soon I will not have access to any kind of computer, or phone. Anyway, thanks for reading! Hope you enjoy! Spread the word! I would love people to read my book. And, if you didn't like something in the book, I'm really sorry. Don't forget to comment me in the feedback (yes that weirdnesses was on porpoise [so was that])! NOw. Time to go play Rainbow Six Siege. Sees ya!
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