Hello friends!
Please let me introduce myself in this story.
Ahem!
My name was: Gruragaramograd the Great numbered Twenty-five point One, born and raised in a family full of Demon Lords.
Yes, you heard it right!
My family, from my great great grandpa to the tiny little kids, we were all Demon Lords!
Heh?
I'm not joking!
They were!
One hundred percent real Demon Lords!
But why so many Demon Lords you ask?
Hehe...
I have no fucking idea.
Well, it's not like you can choose your own mom and dad!
You know what I mean?
Urgghh…
It was so awful, to be born in the wrong family.
It was like a curse.
The most annoying curse ever!
What?
You think I'm joking?
Why?
I'm telling you the truth!
Because of my bloodline, I soon became the strongest warrior!
Brought forth destructions and despair to a million and three races!
Let's see...
"Yellow goblin, white goblin, black goblin, red goblin, pink goblin, …#FF6347 goblin, #FF6348 goblin …"
And why would I do that?
Isn't that obvious?
Because I was bored to death!
Yes, I was sooo bored.
So I went all over the world looking for a worthy opponent.
But, sadly, everyone failed me…
They all failed!
Most of them died right after my first kick you know?
And even the Great Dragonogard, the Dragon of all Dragons, who was NOT invisible by the way, could only withstand two kicks!
In short, life was too easy for me.
As I could get my hands on anything easily, but not the thing I wanted the most.
It was ironic, that when you became the strongest, everything became meaningless.
Or should I say, I had everything, but it turned out to be nothing in the end.
So, please tell me this, friends, how the hell can I live a life like that?
Well, fortunately, the gods seemed to understand my wishes. They somehow transported so many random people from another worlds here to fight me.
And for a short moment, I was so excited!
A person from another world!
Unknown challengers of mysteries!
And that made me spend days and nights hardening my horns and honing my skills to the greatest while waiting for my hero in shining armor!
But, ... you know what?
They were all idiots!
The people from another world, were fucking idiots!
Isekai heroes?
My ass!
Rushed to fight me without proper preparations.
Bland personalities.
Dense and stupid as shit!
And what the hell with that so many loli companions?
Can they even fight?
And even a slime!?
Seriously?
Thus, I decided to act.
I had to change my own fate!
On that starry night, October the first, when bears started their long winter nap under their tiny caves, here I was, on the top of mount AntDew, facing my one hundredth opponent from another world.
***************************************************************************************************
"Demon Lord Gruragaramograd the Great numbered Twenty-five point One!" the warrior named Megamon called out to me with an angry voice.
Why the hell are you so angry? I thought
And then, all of the sudden, Megamon shouted.
"In the name of justice! I shall have your head!"
Ehhh… Such a rude person.
But, as I knew that human are intelligent lacking creatures, I didn't really mind.
And then, "Okay," i said to him.
And Pop!
Unplugged my head.
"Here you go, there's my signature on top, please don't lewd" I handled him the head, didn't forget my own signature.
However, upon seeing my beautiful gift, Megamon turned pale and screamed.
"W-what the hell is this?"
What? You can't tell? You asked for my head but don't know what a head is?
For some unknown reason, perhaps retardedness, Megamon didn't understand what was going on.
Oh boy…
"Friend, this thing is called "the head". An anatomical unit that consists of the skull, hyoid bone and cervical vertebrae. And in this case, MY head. It is a work of art that many people are willing to buy with millions and millions of gold coins"
Yes, that's the truth.
There were pictures of my head on millions and millions of posters all around the world you know?
And with so many numbers below it you know?
However, even though he heard my explanation clearly, this dude continued shouting and yelling non-senses at my face.
"What??? You Demon! I'm not buying your fucking head! And I'm not your fucking friend you little piece of shit!"
"No! I am giving you this for FREE!!! You don't have to buy it!"
"Arrrrgghhh!!!" And then he screamed.
"Urrghhh…" I also sighed.
At that point, I gave up, as I noticed my brain cells committing suicide one by one.
There was no way in hell I could hold a proper conversation with you dumbass creature anymore…, I thought.
But then, I suddenly realized...
Yeah.
I forgot!
Humans are … IDIOTS.
They do NOT understand a work of art.
***************************************************************************************************
As the conversation couldn't continue anymore, the guy decided to do something else.
"Demon! I'm not gonna waste my time talking nonsense to you anymore! I'm gonna kill you right now! With my awesome ultimate move of justice and friendship!" said Megamon, and with a schwingg, he pulled out this very beautiful sword.
It was a huge two-handed sword with golden shining hilt. And as I appraised the sword by using ultra demonic vision of darkness, I could see it, the power!
The sharpness!
It sliced an electron in half!
Brrrrrrrrrr!
I shivered, and with a dancing heart, I jumped back, and readied myself to receive this upcoming ultimate move of justice and friendship with anticipatory excitement.
"Wa** na wa Megamon! O great God of Twenty-eight dimensions! I offered thee my soul in exchange for power! To protect the globe from destruction! / To dominate all people within our nation! …"
OOoooohhh!!!! It's coming!!!!
I could feel it, the massive amount of energy building up within the sword, as it literally sucked the continent dry of magical molecules.
Swheeeeeeeeeeeeeennnngg!
The ground shook vigorously as the sword glowed brighter and brighter and vibrated with this ear-wrenching sound.
"This is going to be awesome!!!!" I shouted out loud, as I couldn't restrain my dancing heart anymore.
And then, it came!
"O' Great Holy Sword of Englando! EAT THIS YOU FUCKING DEMON! EsssssssssssssuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuUUU…."
"HAHAHA! COMEEEEE!!!"
"…UUUCALIBURA!!!!!!"
PHSSSS#%$#%#@%@!!!
With the sound of unreal explosion, Megamon shot out a beam of light so intense that it destroyed the whole top of mount AntDew in an instant!
Everything the light touched vaporized in the blink of an eye.
Heaven and earth screamed in fear!
It was a great move. Such power, much wow.
"I won, there's no way he could have survived my ESUCALIBURA!" I bet one hundred cupcakes that it was what he thought.
But, to defeat me? Pfffft!
As the man slowly regained vision since he blinded himself with that intense beam of light, he could see the aftermath.
The smug look disappeared from his teenager face.
His facial skin went white and his eyes shot open.
"No way … NO WAY!" he screamed, as he could still see ME!
A handsome and beautifully tanned Demon Lord!
And then…
Pop!
"Sorry friend, but gotta go now. Thank you so much for the gift and see ya later!"
I said as I gave my thanks to him, for the gift exchanging event and that flashy firework.
And of course, I didn't forget to include a proper goodbye either!
It was sad, but I really had to come home soon.
Well, see you later young isekai-er.
Can't wait to put your art on the shelf when I get home!
Hmmm… Now I think back about it...
Megamon the warrior, what a nice guy he was!