KingAraragi

KingAraragi

male LV 1
2020-11-16 加入 United States
徽章 5

Moments 118
KingAraragi
KingAraragi
3 years ago
Posted

I really love this story so far. The worldbuilding is great, but the way you formulated your words was even better. It's incredibly unique the way you form your sentences, and the descriptions are great.

KingAraragi
KingAraragi
3 years ago
Posted

Really interesting story so far. What sets this one apart from most other stories I have read is the terminology. There are a lot of unique abilities being used, and you can tell that the author used a lot of creativity when crafting this world.

KingAraragi
KingAraragi
3 years ago
Posted

The auxillary chapter shows me that you put a lot of thought into this world. The setting is grim, and the characters are rough. I think the strongest points of the story come from the dialogue. Each character is filled to the brim with personality. (I also enjoy the gore you put into the story.)

KingAraragi
KingAraragi
3 years ago
Posted

Ok so I read the first three chapters. I plan on reading more later, but there are some interesting things I've noticed. Quality 4.9/5 Decent writing style. Not too flashy, and also nor bad in any way. Other than a few errors in sentence structure, it was smooth. If there's one thing I can nitpick, it's that you haven't really done a great job of describing the appearance of the characters. I'm not going to hold that against you though, because you might have in a chapter I haven't read. Updates 5/5 Nothing to say really. Story design 3/5 In the first chapter there is way too much going on. Powers are used, names are dropped, there's fighting, and all at the same time it's hard to understand who's talking because we have no clue who is on what side doing what. I understand that this is some sort of flash forward scene, or a scene to get the reader interested, but it was a bit much. The second chapter is better about this, but there is still a lot thrown at the reader to understand. World Background 5/5 I can tell that there is a lot of stuff going on in this story by how much info was dropped in the first few chapters. The world seems like it is full of info ready to be read. Overall, it was a 4.4 from me. I plan to read more later, because this was certainly interesting. Good luck on future chapters!

KingAraragi
KingAraragi
3 years ago
Posted

Overall really good story. The introduction is mysterious, yet full of information. The descriptions of the characters are well written. The only errors I could find is the occasional run on sentence. Other than that, it was really good.

KingAraragi
KingAraragi
3 years ago
Posted

Good, intriguing story, There are a few minor mistakes, but nothing that is unfixable. For example, the beginning of the first chapter is a bit explain-y. Too much info at one time can bore the reader. After that, the story is very fluid and smooth. Good job so far!

該書已被刪除。
KingAraragi
KingAraragi
3 years ago
Replied to NotBeatrix

Thanks a lot for the great review! It means a lot coming from such a talented author!

KingAraragi
KingAraragi
3 years ago
Posted

This one was really great. Honestly one of the best I've read on the website. I love the kind of... powetic approach you took. (Best word I can think of) It reminds me a lot of books I used to read as a child. Less focusing on the characters or world and more focusing on describing the movement of scenes and characters. You really don't see that on this kind of website. And I really do respect that. When I write, I tend to lean towards character developement, and I know a lot of writers on here focus on creating the same fantasy world over and over. I respect that you decided to just... tell your story. You could've easily picked something that would of gotten you thousands of views, but you instead chose something that represents you and your style of writing. In some ways, I really look up to you as a writer. Keep up the good work!

KingAraragi
KingAraragi
3 years ago
Commented

Very interesting name. Does it hold some kind of meaning?

KingAraragi
KingAraragi
3 years ago
Commented

I'm really starting to fall in love with the writing style. Some stories need simpler styles, and some need more sophisticated descriptions to paint an image. You picked the perfect style that suits the mood of the story.