Michael_Freeland

Michael_Freeland

LV 15
2020-10-02 加入 United States
徽章 15

Moments 11
Michael_Freeland
Michael_Freeland
1 years ago
Commented

The grammar needs some refining, and I would like to say the ideas of this story have potential, the descriptions of actions are lacking, there is more tell them show, I recommend trying to visualize in perfect order what happened and describe it only after you can see it in your head completely like you are watching it right now, and everyone else can't see it. I will continue reading on, because I like the ideas, and hope to see the authors development into a better writer of his stories

Michael_Freeland
Michael_Freeland
1 years ago
Commented

it is a good epiphany moment, realizing he is rushing head long in without really understanding what he was really doing, he fell for his own miner success, let himself make mistakes not to unlike his past, and did not well protect his future witch is his main goal. Yet now you see him faced with that knowledge.

Michael_Freeland
Michael_Freeland
3 years ago
Commented

2 pages of mess ups that made it cost more. hmmmmmm. one must wounder if he knew??

Michael_Freeland
Michael_Freeland
3 years ago
Commented

please use the announcement tool to say all that it makes your pages cost more because of extra words on the page. The tool is available to you, because of your level. it would be much appreciated. ty

My werewolf system Exclusive on P.a.t.r.e.o.n it's only $1 dollar a month. Cheaper than webnovel :) and you get access to the MVS webtoon. (2 Chapters per month)

My Vampire System

My Vampire System

Fantasy · JKSManga

Michael_Freeland
Michael_Freeland
3 years ago
Commented

The word advice is the correct way to say it and write it. It is considered plural and singular at same time.

I'm Jay's case, Dr. Chu would always give him advises as Jay used to visit the hospital almost after every raid.

The Abandoned Hunter

The Abandoned Hunter

Action · 1st_Manga_KING

Michael_Freeland
Michael_Freeland
3 years ago
Commented

it needs to be fixed I'm should be thw word in caps looks like In. I thought i would help out, this time.

I'm Jay's case, Dr. Chu would always give him advises as Jay used to visit the hospital almost after every raid.

The Abandoned Hunter

The Abandoned Hunter

Action · 1st_Manga_KING

Michael_Freeland
Michael_Freeland
3 years ago
Replied to TheNut

spoilers man not every one has read everything that's hes put out yet still reading today. lol no worries, it will still be a food read.

Michael_Freeland
Michael_Freeland
3 years ago
Commented

I cant believe it this is the first vampire story I cant stop reading. keep up the good work, the way your character's development moves feels natural and not forced.

Michael_Freeland
Michael_Freeland
3 years ago
Commented

See this! I just gifted the story: Balloon

Michael_Freeland
Michael_Freeland
4 years ago
Replied to Michael_Freeland

sorry it sent before I finished writing and spell checking my phone is a little tuchy.