/ Fantasy / The Devourers System
摘要
{Heads up I will be rewriting and editing the first volume to better reflect changes made as well as make things flow better so please re read if you can}
In a world where systems are common, from common leveling systems to evolving dragon systems to even god-making systems.
I'm given a named one that now not, only do I get stronger from killing, but eating my prey as well. I don't know why, but I yearn to kill and eat all to get stronger.
Maybe it's the dreams I've been having since I was bestowed with this system, or maybe...something more?.... Can I live up to my dreams and what's been given to me?
標籤
-- 收到的禮物 
-- 推薦票
榜單 
-- 推薦票 你也許也喜歡
2評論
- 寫作品質
- 更新的穩定性
- 故事發展
- 人物形象設計
- 世界背景
與他人分享您的想法
寫檢討
Read what was free for a reference point(to few chapters to be charging in my opinion but do things your way). Grammar needs a lot of work. Some sentences left me lost at what was happening. Also study up on when and where to use commas. The world building is ok but it’s lacking in detials. What world is he on, where is his home world, what is the geography of the city and area he is in? The systems also doesn’t seem to be the same across the board. Lvl doesnt mean much if the class is weak. Also didn’t talk about monsters and their systems or growth patterns. You also wrote about realms but not in any detail so we can have an idea what it means. Getting strong from eating what you kill is used a lot lately and there is no real unique attention grabber for me. Update stability is also not where I would hope for a story that is charging. Hope you can rework the story and edit it. Good luck
yes a review from the creator but i feel this book is worth reading its not the most structured and the writing could always improve like any story but i feel that it can be a great read to many who would take the time to give it a chance