章節 42: 42. Chapter 42
Spending her evenings talking with Rosita becomes a thing for Waverly and she can’t say she isn’t happy about it. Rosita is smart and educated and so worldly. She challenges Waverly intellectually and it excites Waverly. She really feels like she can confide in Rosita. She can talk about her marriage issues, or her family issues or her work issues and not hurt anyone’s feelings. It is nice. It is nice to talk with someone who is outside her family.
Unfortunately, Waverly is so engrossed in Rosita that she doesn’t notice her wife and how she is becoming less and less present. Her friends definitely notice and even her father notes it. But Waverly doesn’t. The only time she seems to notice Nicole at all is when the fight happens.
Waverly comes home from the bar and finds Nicole and Dolls drinking in the living room. Nicole hadn’t felt up to watching Rosita and Waverly ignore everyone for yet another night, so she had asked Dolls to just come with her to the house.
As she enters, Dolls stands up and walks over to her. “I need a moment of your time… outside.”
Waverly looks at him questioningly, but follows, noticing that Nicole seems completely in her own head.
As soon as the front door closes and they are out in the driveway, Dolls speaks. “What is your game Earp?”
“What?” Waverly asks, confused by his harsh tone.
“What is going on here? Am I missing something? Because you haven’t spent any of your free time with your wife in over a week. You know how I know that for certain? Because your sister and I have been here every night with her while you go have fun with your new friend. And that is all fine and dandy for you, but it’s not enough for her. I don’t know if you are just here, playing house and trying to act like you care for her or if you are just too blind to see what is actually happening. Either way, it is not enough. She deserves better than that.” Dolls says, his voice surprisingly angry. “I have kept quiet out of respect for Cole’s wishes, but I am done being quiet about this. That is my best friend, my sister in there and she is upset. And I will not just stay silent and allow you to trample all over her heart. Nicole is a good person Waverly, many would be lucky to have her in their lives. And I see the way you look at her, the love you have for her when you actually pay attention to her. Problem is, you haven’t even been paying attention to her since Rosita entered the picture.” He takes a deep breath and his voice softens. “I know what real love looks like, what it feels like. I have experienced it myself so I recognize it when I see it. You two have it. But you are throwing it away.” He takes a step closer to her but doesn’t hug her like he once would have. “Fix it.”
After Dolls leaves, Waverly just stands there for a moment. She isn’t sure where that came from but decided she will sleep on it and figure things out in the morning. As she reenters the house, Waverly notices Nicole hasn’t gotten up from the couch. “Nic? You coming to bed?”
“Later.” Nicole says simply, voice void of emotion.
“You okay?” Waverly asks.
“Fine. Goodnight Waverly.”
“What the hell is your problem.” Waverly asks, tossing her purse on the chair. I guess this isn’t going to wait until morning.
“Nothing Waverly.” Nicole stay, voice stoic.
“Clearly it is something because you are being a grump. What? Are you pissed at me over something? It this about the whole moving in together thing? Look Nicole, if it’s a problem then we really need to rethink things. I thought we talked about this.” Waverly says, her voice agitated.
“Waverly, just don’t. Not tonight. We can talk in the morning if you want. But I am not doing this now.” Nicole says, standing up and walking into the kitchen.
“Doing what? You aren’t doing anything. You aren’t saying anything. You are just being a jerk.” Waverly growls, following Nicole into the kitchen. She is careful not to start yelling, but she feels the frustration building.
“I’m the jerk?” Nicole feels her control slip. “Really? Are you that blind Waverly? I haven’t said anything, because you are an adult. But that is bullshit.”
A little startled by Nicole’s response, Waverly recovers and feels a new surge of fire run through her. “No. You know what is bullshit? This. This is bullshit. How can you be angry at me for something that you have no right to be angry about? Where I want to live is my decision and I told you I needed to take this slow.”
Nicole just stares at her. “This isn’t about moving in together or anything that has to do with that. This is about the fact that you are basically ignoring everyone else because you spend all your free time elsewhere. I feel like I have a right to be upset about that. If you want to get angry with me, fine. But I don’t have to do this. I am going to bed. Do what you want. I know you will do that anyways.”
Nicole leaves the kitchen and slams the door to their bedroom. Waverly stomps out the house and drives to Shorty’s, hoping her friend is still there.
It’s two in the morning and Waverly realizes her, Rosita and Shorty are the only ones left in the bar. “Damn. I completely lost track of time.” Waverly says, giggling.
“Me too. I guess that is what happens with good company. We got quite the connection.” Rosita responds, sipping her drink.
“Ladies, I am heading home for the night. Waves, you need a lift home?” Shorty asks.
“No, I am okay. Thanks Shorty.” Waverly responds.
“I will lock up Shorty.” Rosita says, waving goodbye to her boss. He is acting a little weird tonight, but she isn’t sure why.
He walks out and leaves the girls alone in the bar. “If you’re tired, I can go. My jeep is in the parking lot and I am okay to drive.” Waverly offers.
“No, no. Please stay. I like having you here. It is nice talking with someone like you. So, tell me, what is up with you and Officer Pleat in her Pants?”
“What do you mean?” Waverly asks with a giggle. She takes another shot, losing count as to what number she is on.
“Well, you told me about the fight. But I mean beyond that. She just isn’t really what I envisioned your type being. I mean, she is just so… cop.” Rosita jokes.
Waverly laughs. Okay maybe I am a little more intoxicated than I thought. She says to herself. “Well, yeah. I mean, we were put together by our parents. There wasn’t really a lot of choice beforehand. And I am still not ready for a lot of stuff she is ready for. I guess I am just angry with her and overwhelmed by her. Things just seem to be a little harder between us recently. It is like she just… I don’t even know. She doesn’t even look at me anymore. I worried about a loveless marriage before but now… it feels like a reality. I know part of it is my fault, I just am so afraid to do something wrong with her that I don’t do anything at all.”
“I am sorry Wavy. Maybe you two just aren’t, you know, right. It wouldn’t be the first time. Happy marriages need that connection. That love and bonding. Some couples just don’t have it. You deserve that. You deserve to have everything and someone willing to give it to you.” Rosita says, looking deep into Waverly’s eyes. Waverly looks at her, starring at the Latina’s eyes. Rosita scoots closer and shifts her hand from Waverly’s knee to her thigh.
“Rosie, what are you doing?” Waverly asks, sobering a bit at Rosita’s brazen move. Waverly doesn’t lean in, but she also doesn’t pull away when Rosita kisses her. A little in shock. After a second, Rosita deepens the kiss and that is what pulls Waverly from her shocked state.
Waverly’s brain fails to catch up, her thoughts slow. There are lips on hers, but they feel wrong, not like it should. As if something snaps inside her, Waverly shoots up and gets off her stool and away from Rosita entirely.
“Wavy?” Rosita asks.
“I’m with Nicole.” Waverly says. “I’m… oh god I am married to Nicole. Oh my god Rosita, no. Oh no. Shit, Rosita. I love my wife. Why… what just happened?”
“Waverly. Relax.” Rosita says, sitting up. She moves over and kisses Waverly’s neck roughly as the brunette tries to scramble away. “You said it yourself. Things aren’t working between you two. There is nothing wrong with going after what you want.”
“This was a mistake.” Waverly says, grabbing her bag and putting over her shoulder. “Rosita, I’m sorry but I love my wife. Things might not be great but I love her and I am just a mess.”
“Waverly, wait. Let’s talk about this. C’mon. You and I have talked through stuff every day since the day we met. Our connection, we can get through this.” Rosita says, standing and trying to kiss the shorter brunette again.
“No, Rosie. I can’t.” Waverly says. “I can’t but I also don’t want to. I am drunk and sad and I really just need to make things right. I am sorry.” And then it hits her. Rosita’s words. Every day since the day they met.Oh shit.Waverly pulls herself away from Rosita further and texts her sister.
Wave (2:27am): Can you pick me up from Shorty’s? I am too drunk to drive. Please.
Nonna (2:28 am): I am on my way, I will be there in 10.
Waverly moves to go up the steps but Rosita grabs her. “Waverly. Wait. Why are you leaving? Why are you going to stay in a marriage you don’t want to be in?”
“Rosita, I love my wife. Things are hard and I am struggling with my own mind and heart, but I do love her. I love her and I have made a big mistake. I would never cheat on her. I vented to you because I thought you were my friend. I just needed to talk things out. I never wanted this. I am sorry if I led you on but I don’t have eyes for anyone but Nicole.” Waverly says in a rush, panicking.
“Waverly, you are making a mistake. Don’t leave. I can be what you want, what you need.” Rosita says, trying to connect with the shorter brunette again.
Waverly keeps their distance between them. “Rosita, Nicole is who I want.” And it is at her own words that everything clicks in Waverly’s head. She wants Nicole and the life they both want. She wants that. Both her head and heart want that. The only fear left is that she has done too much damage to repair her marriage. Waverly runs out the front doors and waits outside for her sister. She feels tears streaming down her face, but she holds the sobs back, knowing she just needs to focus on getting out of here.
Wynonna pulls up minutes later in her truck, stopping just long enough for Waverly to get in before driving off.
“You want to talk about it?” Wynonna asks, not taking her eyes off the road.
Waverly just sobs, shaking her head and curling into a ball on the seat.
They arrive at the homestead and Wynonna just shuts the engine off but doesn’t move to get out of the car. Neither knows how much time passes before Waverly’s sobs quiet. She sniffles and finally looks at her sister, who has an unreadable expression on her face.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Wynonna repeats.
Waverly nods, but gets out of the car and leads Wynonna inside. They sit on the couch and Waverly curls back up in a ball, leaning slightly into her sister.
“I cheated on her. Fuck, I cheated on my wife. What the hell is wrong with me?” Waverly says, looking at her hands as if they will tell her the answer.
“So, you must really love Rosita then...” Wynonna ventures, popping the cap off her whiskey bottle.
“I liked Rosita as a friend but... wait, hey, how did you know it was Rosita?” Waverly asks in horrified shock.
“Babygirl, Rosita has been all over you since she and you met and you spend all your free time with her. A few guys in the bar were even placing bets on how long it would take for you to cheat on Haught or dump her for Rosita.” Wynonna says matter-of-factly.
“Oh my god.” Waverly whines, rubbing her eyes with her hand. “I fucked up Nonna. I had a fight with Nicole and I was angry and Rosie was saying all the right things and she kissed me and I didn’t pull away quick enough. But then it just felt wrong, because it wasn’t with Nicole. It wasn’t Nicole touching me and it wasn’t Nicole kissing me. And I stopped it but I stopped it too late. Fuck! What have I done.”
Wynonna doesn’t say anything. She just holds her sister and waits, knowing nothing she can say in this moment will change anything. And, in all honesty, she doesn’t have comforting words for Waverly. All her words are angry and will eventually come. But not now. Now, she will take her cues from her sister on this one.
“I can’t believe I did this. What is wrong with me? Oh my god, I have to tell Nic. She is going to hate me. This is going to break her heart. What if she divorces me because of this? Or because of how I have been treating her? What if she never speaks to me after this? Why aren’t you saying anything?!” Waverly begins to panic.
“Because I am almost one hundred percent sure you don’t want to hear what I have to say and I refuse to lie to you or give you anything but the truth.” Wynonna says softly.
“I don’t care. Speak. Give me the truth.” Waverly says.
“I think you already did break Nicole’s heart. I think it broke as she watched, every day, as you chose to spend time with Rosita and completely ignored her and the rest of us. That is why she stopped coming with us to Shorty’s after work. It was either go home or sit there and watch you and Rosita flirt. Outside of work, we never see you because you are always with Rosita. I am not trying to guilt you Babygirl, I am just stating the facts as I see them.”
“Why didn’t she say anything?” Waverly asks softly, tears once again streaming heavily down her face.
“For the same reason that she has never made you do anything you didn’t want to do. Because she doesn’t want to take your choices away. You were forced to marry her. She didn’t want to take anything else away from you. Even at her own personal pain. She just wants you to be happy Waverly. We all do. Even if that meant being with Rosita. And if she had told you not to hang out with Rosita. We both know you would have been angry and done it anyways.” Wynonna sighs and pulls her sister in tighter. “She told Dolls she thought you might be having second thoughts about… you and her. And that she wasn’t going to interfere. And um…”
“And?” Waverly asks.
“And she said if you wanted to go… she would let you as long as you were happy. She wouldn’t cause trouble or go after you with the courts or bad mouth you to the town. She would just sign the papers and be done with it. If that is what you wanted.” Wynonna say, sounding pained by the information.
“What do I do?” Waverly asks.
“Go home and tell your wife the truth. But maybe wait until morning. You’re still drunk and you should probably sleep it off.” Wynonna says.
Waverly nods and hugs her sister once more before going up to her room. She knows she won’t sleep much tonight, but at least some privacy will be granted to her.
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