章節 25: Down the rabbit hole
She moves away from him. Even if she tells him everything, he won't believe her. To be honest, she is rather afraid of people who would believe her without a question. They either want her to talk to the dead or they have other ulterior motives.
Sei folds his fingers and looks away awkwardly. The air between them grows tense. He can feel that she's watching him quietly. He has been so conscious of her gaze since the time she began watching him.
It's not like he's never been curious. When he transferred for the first time, he heard rumors about her. Back then, everything was hard. He wanted to know why his father did what he did. He wondered if she could help him. After observing her for a while and reading many scientific explanations, he decided not to believe in such things.
His father killed his mother before he killed himself.
Why did his father do it? He had spent years wondering why.
Some questions cannot be answered. The fact that his father committed suicide after killing his mother right in front of him will never change. But then, he is no longer curious. He knows why his father did that.
He is working in the same profession that his father had. He doesn't want to rely on emotions. He has been grasping on to logic as the final thread of sanity. There are no such things as ghosts or demons. Nobody can see the past or the future. There's only present -- the current moment between them.
"Sorry for the last night. You helped me a lot." Wakana looks at her bandaged hands. "In return, I will be honest with you about the case. Whether you believe me or not, it's your choice."
It's not like she can avoid it now. The milk has been spilled. He already thinks that she's crazy. At worst, he will report her at work for being crazy.
He's been waiting. He gives her a solemn nod and walks out of the room. Wakana follows him quietly.
Can he hold this woman in his arms and ever love her without losing himself to the insanity that is gnawing his mind?
Sei puts his hands in his pockets. His fingers touch the cold metal and he hears a dark familiar whisper in his ear, 'Alice falls down the rabbit hole and finds Madness.'
Is he the madness and she's the Alice?
He pulls out his hand and the voices stop. He sits on the other side of the table. Wakana sits in the same place where she sat last night. The place has been cleaned. Did he spend last night cleaning the house before he slept?
He puts his elbows on his thighs and presses his palms together. He stares hard at her.
"Speak."
Wakana becomes quiet, not knowing where to start. She doesn't meet his piercing gaze and looks down. The bandaged hands do not need the gloves. She sighs softly. She has to do this. What's the worst that can happen?
"The rumors that you heard about me are true." She looks straight at him with a resolve to reveal everything to him. "Sometimes, I can see ghosts and demons. I can see strong memories of places, objects, or people if I touch them. That's why I wear gloves to avoid seeing anything accidentally. I can feel strong emotions, sometimes. My abilities are quite unstable. Sometimes, I see or hear a lot. At other times, my days are peaceful."
Sei listens to her quietly, not giving her any clue whether he finds it ridiculous or not.
"That day at the apartment, I saw a demon in the middle of the room. That was the reason why I didn't enter the apartment. When I met Morita Aiko, I asked her about the phantom artist. She knew that it was a demon who did those things to all the women. He was targeting women who have witch's blood in them."
Her eyes become bigger and her voice gets louder as she continues to speak. "He did those horrible things to drain the witch's powers from their blood. He is going to do the same to Morita Aiko, but she was able to lock him in the apartment and escape. That's why the r@pes stopped."
His face is expressionless. She can't read his body. He's hiding it. He doesn't believe her. She didn't expect him to, but it still hurts. She tells him with a soft voice, "It might begin again if he's freed. He told me that he would come for me after he's freed."
"Tell me the exact words that she told you," He says to her soberly.
Wakana gives him a small smile. A flicker of pain passes through her eyes. She repeats the story that Morita Aiko told her. The coffee is cold.
"Thank you for being honest with me." Sei pats her head once with an artificial smile. "We should discuss the same with Nishimura Sama. I will get ready for work quickly. We still have time. I will drive you to your place before we go to work if you want to change your clothes."
She's alone in the living room. She leans back on the couch. It is expected that he wouldn't believe her. Why does a corner of her heart want him to believe her?
She doesn't want to stay here anymore. She takes her stuff and leaves the place.
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