章節 43: Part 42
Third Person's POV
Days had passed since Josh and Justen's conversation and Justen's unknown feelings have grown stronger. Justen hasn't had a day where he hasn't cut his arms, wrists, and, just yesterday, his legs. These feelings have practically consumed Justen, his thoughts, and his everyday actions. As much as he wants to tell Josh, Justen has no idea how to tell him. It also doesn't help that Josh has been talking to Nathan, Carter, and Cameron recently. Because of that, Justen can't get any time where it's just him and Josh.
Josh, on the other hand, has been in a constant state of worry for Justen. He's not complaining but ever since they had their conversation about feelings, Justen hasn't been sharing his. Josh knows there is something up with Justen but is just waiting for Justen to tell Josh. It doesn't help though that Josh has been talking to Nathan, Cameron, and Carter. It just makes it harder for Justen to talk to Josh and Josh knows it. But Josh also knows that he can't push his other friends away because one person needs him the most.
Meanwhile, Justen's dad, David, has also been worrying about Justen. David has been doing everything he can to make his son happy. He's trying to become drug-free, he's cleaned himself up, and he even got a job so he can pay for the house that is in major debt. But after all these things, David still sees Justen come home in a crappy mood and hide away in his room. David wishes he knew how to help his son, but he had no idea. He knows that Justen cuts, he sees the mess that is leftover in the bathroom afterward. Yet still, David is helpless. Justen's dad even went as far as to ask other people for their help but none of them knew how to help either. David feels like he has been defeated, but as long as he keeps an eye on Justen everything will be alright, right?
But Justen feels like he's in this spiral that never ends. All Justen feels is hurt and pain and numbness. He wishes he knew a way out but there's no escape because he's already gone too far.
When Justen got home from school, he tossed his bag on his bed before he walked into the clean bathroom. Not even thinking, he found the pills from the last time he wanted to go through with this and opened the container. There was no going back now. He put a good ten to fifteen pills in his hand and put the pill bottle on the counter. Justen looked at himself in the mirror before he threw his head back and swallowed the pills dry. Tears brimmed his eyes as he looked at his reflection.
A tired boy looked back at him. In the mirror, Justen saw a boy who was around his age. This boy had brown, curly hair that was matted down from not taking a shower for days. Dark bags laid under the poor boy's eyes showing that the boy had many sleepless nights. Finally, Justen saw the boy's arms. They were covered in red lines that went to his elbows. They were deep cuts that couldn't be taken away. Nothing could change the fact that the boy in the mirror was Justen. Nothing at all.
As Justen realized this, his vision became blurry and he began to fall. Justen hit his head on the edge of the counter before his dad burst into the bathroom. Justen's dad took one look around and knew exactly what was going on. David, Justen's dad, immediately grabbed Justen's phone and called Josh.
"Hello?" Josh asked.
"This is Justen's dad. We need a ride to the hospital," David said, worry coating his normally calm voice.
"What's going on?" Josh asked, he now beginning to worry.
"How fast can you get here?" David asked.
"Five minutes tops," Josh said, grabbing the keys to his truck and walking out of his house.
"Please, get here fast," David said. "I'm worried about my son."
"I'm on my way, sir," Josh said, starting his truck up and starting to drive away from his house and to Justen's.
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