章節 281: Chapter 281: Fizbo (2)
[Edward POV]
After getting out of the car, Amy and I walked towards the rock climbing area, leaving the presents inside for now. I was trying to avoid stealing the spotlight from Luke, that's why I disguised myself as the magician.
It was Luke's birthday party, and he was supposed to be the center of attention. I, Edward Newgate is the most famous person within the group of 7-18 year olds through a recent poll, so showing up as myself would definitely steal the spotlight. Even though Luke wouldn't mind, I'd still feel uncomfortable if I ruin his party.
"Ahh…AaaAAaaAAA," I practiced to change my voice. I added 2 pitches higher to my normal volume, and added in a little bit of bass. I was also sporting a blonde wig and a fake mole on my chin for good measure other than my magician costume. Part of me was curious to see if anyone would recognize me like this.
Amy, in her shiny sequin vest, looked uncomfortable as she followed me. She grabbed my coat tail and stopped me. "Are you sure this is a good idea? I'm just meeting these people today!"
I smirked, turning my disguised face behind the masquerade mask to her. "Don't worry, just follow my lead. You're usually pretty good at creating chaos, don't get cold feet now."
Amy grumbled, "I guess I can... My sister isn't the only actress in the family. I'm even better than her at acting! But I don't want to act in your shows though."
I scoffed, "And I don't even want to hire you." She gasped offendedly and kicked my shin, however, her feet missed as I lifted my leg up, which made her almost do a split on the concrete. "Ow!" She exclaimed as she grabbed her inner thigh, face contorting from the pain.
I chuckled and mumbled, "Dumbass."
As we reached the rock wall, I saw Luke climbing the wall, and Phil waiting for him on the ground.
As Luke reached the top, Phil shouted encouragingly, "Great job, buddy. Now comes the fun part. Rappel down."
Luke hesitated as he turned to look at the ground, "It's really high."
Phil pointed his finger at Luke and said, "You have nothing to fear but fear itself…" He turned to the floor and whispered, "..and the concrete."
Amy and I almost burst into laughter when we saw it. Phil turned to Luke again, "But I'm right here, buddy." He raised his arms up, getting ready to catch Luke.
"Okay, just catch me." Luke said before he jumped down the ropes. Suddenly, a fat clown appeared beside Phil, prompting him to retreat quickly in fear. Luckily, the staff for the rock climb was alert at all times, and he made Luke descend by himself slowly.
[Phil's commentary]
"I am brave. Roller coasters? Love 'em. Scary movies? I've seen Ghostbusters,like, seven times. I regularly drive through neighborhoods… that have only recently
been gentrified. So yeah, I'm pretty much not afraid of anything…"
[commentary ends]
Cam, as Fizbo the clown, entered the party merrily and said, "Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, everybody! Quit your clownin' around everybody! That's my job." Cam chuckled like a clown, and danced a bit. The kids who saw him ran towards him immediately, cheering at the same time, including Luke.
Phil froze and had his back behind a bush as he stared at Cam while breathing heavily.
[Phil's commentary]
"...Except clowns. Never shared that with the fam, so... shh." Phil gestured to keep this a secret and added with a fake smile, "Do have an image to maintain. Um, I am not really sure where the fear comes from."
"My mother says it's because when I was a kid, I found a dead clown in the woods, but who knows?"
[Phil's commentary]
Cam walked to Luke and said gleefully, "Hey. Oh. Well, you must be the birthday boy."
"Wow. Is that you, Uncle Cam?"
Cam laughed like a clown again and said, "No. I'm Fizbo the clown. I don't know who this Uncle Cam is, but he sure sounds handsome, doesn't he? Hey, who likes balloon animals?"
The kids shouted at the same time, jumping and raising their arms up, "I do! I do!"
Phil chanted at the side, "It's just Cam. It's just Cam. It's just Cam. It's just Cam."
Mitchell, who followed Cam from behind, walked to the party carrying Lily in the car seat, and saw Phil glued to the bushes. He asked concernedly, "You all right?"
Phil snapped back to reality, "What? Yeah. Just have kind of a…complicated relationship with clowns."
Mitchell said, "Well, join the club."
"I'm going to go–" Before Phil could run away, I stood in front of him and said, "Greetings Muggles! I'm Ed– Atlas, the magnificent! A Magician!" I bowed slightly, tipping my magician at him at the same time.
Phil's initial fear dissipated quickly, and he broke into a grin, "What? I didn't hire a magician?!"
Phil and Mitchell couldn't recognize me, which made me grin. However, Lily, the toddler, was eyeing me suspiciously, which made me gulp my saliva.
"I'm here for Luke Dunphy's birthday party. Am I in the right place?" I pretended not to know them as I asked the question.
Mitchell was a bit skeptical and asked, "It is, but who sent you here?"
"Oh, I'm hired by Mr Newgate." I replied with an innocent look. Phil widened his eyes in excitement and said, "Edward hired you?"
I shook my head, which made them disappointed. Then, I replied, "Mr Theodore Newgate hired me." I widened my eyes and said, "Wait, is Theodore Newgate, Edward Newgate's family?! That old grouch?"
Mitchell chuckled, his initial wariness had gone away as he saw my reaction. He said, "Yeah. It's pretty shocking right?"
Phil cleared his throat and said, "Okay Atlas, even though you're hired by Ted, I need to assess your capabilities first. You might not know this, but I too, dabble in the mystic art–"
My empty right hand went behind my ear, and I pulled out a Teddy bear from it. Phil widened his eyes and exclaimed, "HOW?!"
"A magician never reveals his secret." I said as I gave the teddy bear to Lily. She burst into laughter and hugged it tightly. "So, can I set up my stage now?" I said as I turned to the duo.
"Y-Yeah of course! Um, the thing is, I promised Jungle Tanya to give her some time to get ready. You can go after her." Phil stammered before he agreed.
"I don't mind that." I said casually. "Can we have some cakes though?" Amy blurted out
Phil smiled and said, "Of course! We already cut the cake! Um, wait, Atlas, I see that you didn't bring many tools for your trick. I have some in the garage. Do you want to use that?"
"Oh, I'll take a look, after we eat the cake." I said assertively as I knew Amy was pretty hungry.
Phil smiled in understanding as he too saw Amy's frown and said, "Okay, let's go in first. I'll show you where the cake and the stage is."
We walked in front of the bouncy castle, but the crowd of husbands gathering there made all of us curious, so we stopped to take a look. Jay also came out from the house, having the same reaction as ours.
"Oh hey guys, what are we watching?" He asked happily as he saw the dad's crowd. His eyes followed their gazes, and found his new wife, Gloria, jumping up and down the bouncy castle.
"Aw, geez, Gloria." Jay exclaimed immediately.
"Jay, look! I go high! Look! Look!" Gloria shouted cheerily as she jumped. The figure of her bouncing there was mesmerizing for all the men.
Jay grumbled and scolded the dads, "Guys, hit the road. Come on. You're family men.
Come on. Scat." He chased them away angrily, however he soon saw Phil and I.
"Not you too!" He scolded Phil.
"What happened? I couldn't even see it yet?" Phil replied honestly. A tall father was blocking his view beforehand, so he missed the sweet scene. Jay's gaze stopped at me, and his eyes narrowed in suspicion.
I smiled innocently and asked, "Are you the patriarch of the family?"
"No! I am." Phil quickly turned to me and clarified.
"What?" Jay became confused, and his suspicions of my identity were gone. After the initial introduction by Phil, Jay asked me, "Kid, how old are you?"
"16. And my cousin here is 12." I said as I pointed to Amy.
"I'm 14!" Amy corrected me angrily and tried to hit me, but I grabbed her head, stopping her from reaching me. "Can we hurry? The little beast will become much angrier the longer she's kept hungry."
Jay chuckled and said, "The cake's inside."
Finally, we got some lunch. There's a lot of food there inside the house, and I picked up a slice of fruit. Haley was standing near the foodstand with Alex, watching Jungle Tanya doing her show from afar.
"Um, we're going to start the show. Where is the birthday boy?" Tanya asked around, but the kids there also didn't know where Luke was. Manny, who was sitting on the sofa with Bianca Douglas, the girl who has a crush on him, volunteered, "I'll call him."
"Manny! I'll come with you." Bianca said before she followed Manny with a giggle.
[Manny's commentary]
"I had a crush on her, so I tried out Ed's advice in talking to girls. It worked, but right now, I feel smothered by her clinginess. Maybe I should get a new one." The slimmer, broccoli-haired Manny said smugly.
[Commentary ends]
I smirked as I saw Alex and Haley, intent on teasing them while in disguise.
"Oh hey Ed," Haley greeted coyly.
"You finally here, Edward," Alex grumbled and scoffed.
I was confused and froze in my steps. "Wait, how did you guys know?" I asked, befuddled.
Haley and Alex giggled, and then Haley greeted Amy, "Hey! It's nice to finally meet you." They held each other's hand and jumped giddily.
I was shoved to the side, and I took the chance to ask Alex, "How?"
Alex knew what I was referring to and said, "Hm, Amy is friends with Haley on Instagram. Haley saw her story that you guys are coming here together, so we know."
"Ahh I see. And here I was thinking that she could recognize me no matter who I'm disguised as. The moment is less special now."
Haley heard my words and stopped jumping. She looked at me coyly and said, "I'd recognize you anywhere. Only idiots won't notice this is you."
Alex also laughed at the statement as she agreed with Haley.
"Your dad and your uncle Mitchell didn't recognize me," I said, stopping their laughter abruptly. I added, "Even your grandpa didn't recognize me."
Alex widened her eyes and said, "Really? But it's so obvious though."
Haley nodded in agreement, "Yeah. It was so obvious."
Speechless for a while, I asked astoundedly, "How is it obvious, explain!"
Both girls just laughed without answering my question. Haley asked, "Are you going to perform a magic trick Ed?"
I sighed in defeat and said, "Yeah. But, I lost a bit of my motivation now."
…
Tanya placed the green lizard on Luke's head. The lizard stayed still on top of the curly hair, which made Luke smile in excitement.
Tanya said, "All right, let's all give Luke a big hand for being so brave." Every kids there applauded for Luke.
Luke asked, "This feels so weird. What does it eat?"
Tanya saw the chance and said spookily, "Oh, just…little boy brains!"
The kids burst into squeals and laughters before Tanya said, "Now, who wants to pet the lizard!"
I accidentally said, "She's cute." It was awesome to see that she genuinely loves the reptiles instead of just using them for the show.
Haley's smile froze, and her eyes narrowed as she turned to Tanya. I didn't realize it and said, "I'm kinda nervous now."
Haley turned back towards me and said, "You've performed in front of millions of people. But you're nervous for a kid's birthday party?"
"It's my first time performing a magic trick. So yeah." I replied playfully. Haley asked, "Why magic though? It's kinda lame."
"Oh, you have to ask your dad this question." I threw the blame to Phil without feeling guilty about it.
Claire entered the house again from her arts and craft table outside, and saw Haley giggling when talking to me.
[Claire's commentary]
"Is she flirting with the magician? Has her standard fallen so low? I don't know why, but it looks like it's going to be troublesome. I need to separate them quickly."
[commentary ends]
Before Claire could approach me and Haley, Jungle Tanya said, "Now, for the next performance, the magnificent Atlas will show you guys the wonders of magic!"
"EHH. That's lame. I'd rather play outside." Bianca Douglas whined. Manny also shared the same sentiment, but he said, "You should go out and play. I'm watching it."
"Then, I'm also going to watch it." Bianca said giddily before she hugged Manny's arm and rested her head on his shoulder.
[Manny's commentary]
"So clingy." He shook his head in disappointment.
[Commentary ends]
"I'm up. Kiss for good luck?" I said as I pointed at my cheek. Haley blushed a bit and said, "It's just for good luck." She stood on her toes and gave me a peck on my left cheek.
Claire gasped as she saw it. I walked in front of the crowd when Claire finally reached Haley.
"Wow, so unenthusiastic." I said the crowd, which earned me no reaction. "I guess I understand. Magician is lame. You'd probably seen a lot of magicians at other parties before, am I right?"
"Righttt." The kids answered me honestly. I nodded and said, "You guys probably got burned a lot, right? You were expecting a good show, but slowly, your hope that magic is really true, had died out. You have been hurt so many times, but right now, you decided it's better to not think about it anymore."
Phil, Gloria, Jay, Claire, Alex, Finneas, Billie, Enid, Jenna, Tara, Mitchell, Fizbo (Cam), and Lily, entered the house one by one, and they stood amongst the crowd, watching the show.
"Is he talking about magic or his relationship?" Jenna scoffed at my opening – not knowing that it was me underneath the mask.
"Well, today, I'll try my best to make sure that you'll all believe in magic again and not just be muggles."
"But the props are tweaked. We all know that!" Amy shouted with a cupped hand from afar. Everyone nodded as they heard it, while Phil turned to Amy in shock, "Aren't you his assistant?"
Amy shrugged and whispered, "He told me to do this."
Phil gasped as he turned back towards the stage with a shocked expression, "He's going to Houdini it."
"I guess that's true." I said as I pretended to be dejected. Then, I took off my top hat and said, "You guys probably have seen this many times. I mean, if there's a top hat, the magician is going to pull a rabbit from inside it, right?"
"That's right/Yes!" The audience reacted in vigor. I nodded in understanding and said, "I mean, that poor rabbit. They were probably stuck inside the hat for a long time."
Everyone nodded at my reaction. " Well, I don't want to do that. So, I'm just going to set it aside and pick up some stuff from the table." I said, as I placed the hat on my left side, in the air.
The crowd gasped as I turned my back on the floating hat. And when I turned, I grabbed the hat again, "I found this water cup here. So I'm going to use that."
"The HAT FLOATED!" Luke shouted in excitement. I looked confused and said, "It did?"
Everyone kids nodded at me vigorously, even the adults were really intrigued by it. The crowd becomes bigger and bigger, filling the living room space.
"I mean, I didn't start my routine yet." I scratched my head in confusion, which made some of the adults laugh. But the kids thought I was being truthful and they tried to convince me.
"Alright alright. I'm just going to set it aside for a second." With a flick of my risk, the hat vanished in thin air.
"Whoa." Luke widened his eyes. Manny too was becoming more excited to see the show.
"Like I said before, you guys can make sure that I won't cheat in the performance. So does anyone have a scarf I could borrow?"
"Here, I have one." Enid said as she threw me a wolf-print scarf. I chuckled and said, "Everyone, thank the wolf lady."
"Thank you wolf lady." Every kid followed along.
"Hey!" Enid retorted shyly.
"Anyone have a phone I could borrow?" I asked again, and I got the Iphone from Phil. I told them all, "Well, do you guys believe me when I said, I can get this scarf to go through the phone, without it having a hole in the middle?"
"Eii~" The skeptics scoffed at my words. "Oh, you don't think I can do that? Watch this?"
I held the phone up high on my right side, and placed the scarf end on the middle of the phone. The crowd widened their eyes as they saw it moved into the phone, and came out on the other side.
They exclaimed in amazement, and then applauded my performance. I stopped pulling the scarf halfway and said, "But, that's still a little boring, right? Should I up the ante?"
Everyone nodded in excitement and said, "Yeah!!!"
Amy shook her head and said, "He's just digging a deeper hole for himself."
"For my next performance, I'm going to need a deck of cards. Does anyone have a deck of cards?" I asked sheepishly.
"OOH OOH! I have it!" Phil said before he ran to the kitchen and got a new card from the cabinet.
The show continued after I asked Luke to check the cards for any markings, even shuffled the cards for me to make sure that I didn't mark the cards.
"Before we start, this card doesn't give me a good vibe, so I'm going to rip it." I ripped the 8 of the diamond card into 4 parts, and placed it underneath a see-through glass, holding it together with a paperclip.
"Now, the thing about magic is, the closer you look, the less you see. So don't trust your senses." Shuffling the deck of cards using a spring shuffle technique, I grabbed a King of Spade card and showed it to the audience, "Or else, you're going to lose track of reality."
With a simple turn, the card transformed into a Joker card, which awed the audiences.
I giggled, breaking the serious atmosphere and said, "I'm just bragging. I can't do that yet."
Everyone laughed honestly, and it made the show even more fun to watch.
"Now, for my first card trick, I'm going to show you the real possibility that we're actually living coexistence with another dimension. I called this, the opposite dimension. Now everyone, can you tell me what's the opposite of.." I showed the back of the card, "The colour red?"
"Blue?" Manny answered in confusion.
I nodded and said, "Yes. Blue. Now, do you believe me when I say, Um, I'm borrowing this usb charger, first…" I grabbed the charger from the desk and sat down on the desk, placing the charger cable in the middle of it.
"Now, through this ordinary cable, I'm going to show you the existence of the opposite world. Look closely and carefully, because it'll take a lot of energy for me to show the opposite world."
I placed one card on the back of my hand that was holding the cable tightly, and slowly pushed it to go underneath the cable. "It might seem that I'm crazy, but believe me guys. The opposite world exists." I added cheekily.
As the card slowly passed the cable, the red color turned blue, and the card was split by half in blue and red color. The kids exclaimed in amazement, and I immediately stopped the performance.
"Whoa, did you guys see that?" I asked in shock. Everyone nodded their heads obediently. "That's the opposite dimension." I added before I shuffled the cards again. "That's too spooky for me. I'm going to stop that now and focus on another trick."
Phil chuckled and whispered to Jay who's standing beside him, "It's actually a pretty simple trick, but his execution is really flawless."
"Stop talking to me." Jay replied, still grumpy about Phil's action to gawk at Gloria before.
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