章節 41: Chapter 41: Going Downhill
Breana’s POV
I didn’t know what’d hit me today. I didn’t know how life turned this way. I guess this was the day almost everything about all of us, the four of us, started going downhill.
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I started the day like I always would. I felt relieved. I guess this is how it feels when you’ve actually let go of the things you can’t have, you start seeing the things and the people around you clearly and truly appreciate those.
I’m going to give Ari a chance. It may take us a long trip to go to a full couple relationship but I’m going to give her a chance.
So as I entered the room with Alex that day, eager for this newness in my life, I was happy. So excited I could feel my heart beat faster and louder.
What would it be like? How would we be like? I had that ear-splitting smile…
Then I met her eyes. The ones who always looked at me with adoration but this time they lacked the usual brilliance in them. They were stark.
Alex dragged me on our seat towards the back. I guess she is still nervous with meeting Sunny again. This would be the first time after that kiss with her.
“What’s wrong with them?” Alex was baffled as I was seeing the class is busy, chitchatting with themselves but as if communicating something most of them know aside from us.
“I don’t know either.” I replied.
My eyes are still trained on Ari in the far front. She has her back on me. I wanted her to turn and ask why or what is going on. She’s talking to Sunny so I messaged her.
“Someone’s had a good time yesterday, huh?” It was the usual rude guy in class, the one who Ari talked back to before, always piping out of nowhere. There was no Ari speaking up to him now.
Majority of the class is laughing. Their obvious glances at my and Alex’ direction didn’t go unnoticed by me.
I had an ominous feeling.
Ari might or might not have seen my message but she always takes a glance at us, at least once before the class starts. Not this time.
The teacher entered, eventually the class starts so I had to wait.
It took longer than usual or maybe it is just me being antsy to talk to her. Then the bell rang…
“Hey, Alex, I’ll see you in lunch, gotta catch up with Ari.” I blurted to Alex while pulling the strap of my backpack on my shoulder. I stood up to run after Ari but not before taking a swift glance to see Alex agree with a nod.
She was almost out of sight when I spotted her turning around an unfamiliar corner that doesn’t lead towards our next room and go down the stairs.
“Hey! Ari! Wait up.” I called out to her.
Why is she acting strange?
When she did not stop I had to call out even louder, earning looks of annoyance from some students and teachers that are in the hallway. I run to her.
“Hey, why didn’t you wait for me?” I slowly said, not wanting to be overbearing or demanding.
She stood still, not even turning to face me.
“Ari..” I reach out to touch her shoulder. She flinched upon contact as she turned abruptly.
“Till when?” Her voice is breaking. Her eyes look sore and glassy like she’s on the verge of crying.
I knit my brows in confusion as my heart aches for her. “What do you mean?”
I don’t know what she is talking about and I don’t know why but I feel pained that she looks so much in pain. I wanted to make it go away. I want to make things okay for her.
“Till when are you going to pretend? Till when are you going to lead me on?” She managed to say. Tears she cannot suppress roll down her cheeks.
“What-“
“STOP! Stop acting so innocent… I know already.” She sounded defeated.
What does she know? Or how much does she know? It probably has something to do with Alex but what is it that she knows?
I didn’t have to ask her when she showed me something from her phone. Pictures of last night’s events flashed through the screen.
I froze on the spot. My hands and feet felt cold.
They know. This explains the stares, the murmurs and that guy’s side-comment awhile. Why Ari looked at me the way she did. More importantly, it explains why she is hurt and crying right now.
I had hurt her. Unintentionally.
I’m the reason she’s being like this.
All the hopes I had since morning disappeared before my eyes. I realized I lost my chance with Ari that night I gave up on Alex.
Bad timing. Bad luck.
“I…Ari, I…” I shake my head. I feel like crying as well but I know I don’t deserve to. After all that happened, I shouldn’t be the one who’s crying. She didn’t deserve to be hurt like this. I wanted to tell her everything.
“No. Save it.” Ari said in a flat tone, as if reading my mind and answering my unspoken thoughts.
I did not stop her when she turned to leave me.
What was I supposed to say? I hurt her because I wasn’t being true to myself. Telling her now would just her either way.
If only…
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