摘要
Some people say, if God closes a door, he will open a window for you.
A man dies of one of the most hated diseases on earth. Cancer. He spent his last days with his family and died while watching the World Cup. He suddenly woke up in another world as a new born baby in a bavarian(located in Germany) city.
He had three templates in his mind.
Thierry Henry
Phillip Lahm
Roberto Rivellino
I want a few templates you don't see every day. I never heard of a Lahm template or a Henry template. Lahm was the captain of World Cup 2014 Germany. He never got a red card, even though he was a great defender. And Henry without a doubt was a great striker, with his crazy speed and shots. And about Rivellino, he is a perfect fit for the last template. I think this is enough.
He will play RV, but will often play as a kind of winger with his speed. And maybe he will play completely as a winger. The reader can decide.
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21評論
4.01
- 寫作品質
- 更新的穩定性
- 故事發展
- 人物形象設計
- 世界背景
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寫檢討
you don't describe the match. There is no suspense in the match. Characters are bland.Its seems like I am reading something written by A.I. And for the match description, try to read some football related novel.Learn how they describe it. And for a football novel it quite fast paced.
First of all, I'm not a soccer fan so I had to pause to look for references to players and movements they make in games. After that the pace of the novel is good but we know almost nothing about his world, practically non-existent childhood, only directly to match / training / match / training, for example now he is 15 years old but he still goes to school? It's just these last chapters where we see that he seems to have a life
Even though the chapters are short they are sill very good. One of the best football fanfics there is if not the best. 10/10 keep up the good work 😎
i got to chapter 20 roughly.. maybe it gets better after his formative years but right now, every chapter is you just saying what game mc is playing and then telling us the end result. you havent actually written a full game. its like reading the wiki of a players track record. idk again, maybe it gets better but i cbf after 20 chapters.
Mc baby 🙄 [img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap]
I see if you tell me that the hero is confronted with deliberate attempts to injure him during a match. merci d'avance cher ami, nous allons lire a fond
Мне очень нравится ваше произведения развитие персонаже просто бомба надеюсь так и продолжится. Жду продолжения етого гениально произведения.
The problem with a lot of these sports fanfics is that they are good at telling you about what happens in a game. Even keeping you rooting for the MC to win. But I know nothing about his life. I don't know what car he drives where he lives. What his house looks like what his apartment looks like what his parents house looks like. Nothing. I don't know how much he's getting paid for semi-pro. Don't know if you got a contract to be playing for the pro league. Don't know how much you got paid for that. Don't know how much you got paid to play in the national World Cup. I don't know if he bought anything with his money. I don't know anything. All I know is that he's good at soccer or football. I understand you have to get him out of the miners and the selectbro. You might call it the U10 group. You have to get him in the Simi pros or the pros. But once he was there, it should all be about fun, not just sports.
I really like this book. There isn’t much fanfics about soccer or sports that has many chapters, hope the author continues to write and regularly uploads.
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A good ff.New templates which we don’t see normally and good writing . There is just something that i think u forgot completely .like his past life and personality.we don’t see anything that can relate him to his past life.though u can say he changed but the guy was 45 and even for a change that’s not natural . That’s it .Good job and keep going.
I will say as a pure football novel, this is very good but regarding MC's childhood/schooldays/teenage years we know nothing except the football matches he played. This makes the story like very fast paced and jumping from one match to another. There are casual chapters too later like the FMC introduction but author says that he will make MC breakup with 2-3 girls and maybe make him marry another different girl which i didn't like. If he finds the right person then he should stay with her why try to change FMC just to make it realistic. MC lived in that world from as a toddler but he only streams Fortnite like i don't want it to be totally business related but he could do tons of things in those 'time-skips' other than football too.