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- 寫作品質
- 更新的穩定性
- 故事發展
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寫檢討
( **This is important read it please ****)I loved this story. The story is developing well, but I hope that more chapters will be released quickly, and I hope that the hero takes advantage of the system to develop his body and trains in martial arts, because although Kendo is strong, it does not greatly strengthen the body. Make him use the system well. Because this is what any person who has a system will do, and do not let the hero be ashamed and act like a teenager, and remember that his mental age is 40 years old, and he can control hormones by training his body, and do not let him not respond to girls who speak in a commanding tone to him because there is no man who likes to be commanded. A woman who is not even his wife,I know that's long. 😅😅
You got me hooked with the title. Who can resist a Mother I’d Like to Fry rice for? No one… 💀
I like it so far (chap 15). - i wanted to ask a question to the author, is this fanfic taking some inspiration from that fanfic about hachiman? -I am asking because the story progression is different but things like him taking up novel writing and all the girls so far are the same. -apart from the new ones you introduced.
It is good read until now Sjjsjsjsjekwo2o8283844uhfnxnakq92983urydhxhi38384859goodosjqh2u28eixjnxbxbxi4i38839291isjxjjd48njdjdxjjzkkaka s s e w w wbjwifij j ufuxu u ju i i i i i i ujrrb e f tbtbtb u u u. Y 4 3 e 4 4. 6 u u v x. W. 3 t f c. S w 2 4. T g x. S w 2 1. 3 4 4. 4 t y g v. X s a w t g. H h h h h h f d s. S x d r e. D
Is it a translation? if yes pls share the name of the original. . . thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx
The story has a great premise. HfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffh
I read all of the existing chapter and although this looked to be smut, it seems it will have coherent plot and realistic pacing. Good grammae and pacing, I wonder if you will add hentai heroines. High hopes.
( **This is important read it please ****)I loved this story. The story is developing well, but I hope that more chapters will be released quickly, and I hope that the hero takes advantage of the system to develop his body and trains in martial arts, because although Kendo is strong, it does not greatly strengthen the body. Make him use the system well. Because this is what any person who has a system will do, and do not let the hero be ashamed and act like a teenager, and remember that his mental age is 40 years old, and he can control hormones by training his body, and do not let him not respond to girls who speak in a commanding tone to him because there is no man who likes to be commanded. A woman who is not even his wife,I know that's long. 😅😅
You got me hooked with the title. Who can resist a Mother I’d Like to Fry rice for? No one… 💀
I like it so far (chap 15). - i wanted to ask a question to the author, is this fanfic taking some inspiration from that fanfic about hachiman? -I am asking because the story progression is different but things like him taking up novel writing and all the girls so far are the same. -apart from the new ones you introduced.
It is good read until now Sjjsjsjsjekwo2o8283844uhfnxnakq92983urydhxhi38384859goodosjqh2u28eixjnxbxbxi4i38839291isjxjjd48njdjdxjjzkkaka s s e w w wbjwifij j ufuxu u ju i i i i i i ujrrb e f tbtbtb u u u. Y 4 3 e 4 4. 6 u u v x. W. 3 t f c. S w 2 4. T g x. S w 2 1. 3 4 4. 4 t y g v. X s a w t g. H h h h h h f d s. S x d r e. D
Is it a translation? if yes pls share the name of the original. . . thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx thx
The story has a great premise. HfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffhHfhfjsjsncjjdkssmbffh
I read all of the existing chapter and although this looked to be smut, it seems it will have coherent plot and realistic pacing. Good grammae and pacing, I wonder if you will add hentai heroines. High hopes.
its good but the chapter is so short hope u extend it