章節 2143: 11
Chapter 11: Aunt May, Competent Adult
Notes:
Yo! Just a heads up Daisy talks about some of her behavior from when she was in LA dealing with Ghost Rider and how she basically had a death wish. So like...I don't think it's triggering, but if it is just go ahead and skip the part where Peter, Daisy and May are talking at the end of the chapter. That said I don't linger or really spend a lot of time on it. And its not graphic or anything so ya'll should be fine. But didn't want to be a dick and just not say anything.
Chapter Text
Darcy happily bopped along to her soundtrack dujour as she moonwalked out of the lab. She spared a wave to Jane who was writing manically across the whiteboard. Janey would survive, intervention for food would be required but not for another three or so hours. Whistling she opened the hallway window. Pulling her earbuds out she crossed her arms. "You two ready to follow my lead?"
Peter and Daisy just looked at her with 'duh' expressions on their faces as they climbed in through the window. Well Daisy had a 'duh' expression. Peter's head was under his mask so it was more a general aura of 'duh' in his case.
"Right, to the gym!" Darcy announced and led them down the hall.
-Ms Lewis, do you require any assistance?- FRIDAY's voice asked.
Darcy pretended not to see the excited light in her sister's eye. "No thanks FRIDAY. Go ahead and put Quake and Spiderkid here as my guests. And tell Tony he might enjoy the video footage from the gym."
-Of course Ms Lewis.- FRIDAY agreed like the excellent AI she was.
She grinned. "Cool, now come amigos! We have a Super Soldier to defeat in public debate."
"Think he'll sign something for me? Cause I have a poster." Daisy asked, though her stride said she was so here to kick some ass.
Peter bounced. "I can't believe we get to meet Captain America!"
"Sup." Darcy waived at a very confused looking paralegal on the elevator as they all climbed in. She returned her attention to her siblings. "And sure you can ask him. But can you keep the fangirling till after you've punched some common sense into him? Cause Tony's going to have an aneurysm if he and Steve keep arguing without either of them willing to compromise."
"Uh….." Paralegal trapped in the elevator started.
Darcy sighed. "You get used to it." She turned to Daisy. "Didn't AC want you to get the Captain to sign some trading cards or something?"
"He's got the whole set. Very proud." Daisy shrugged, which only looked slightly weird when she was in the full Quake get up. The face mask was kinda ridiculous but safety first.
Peter adjusted his right webshooter. "Oh hey did you guys see that interview Amira did with your Inhuman friend?"
"Yeah, I don't think America needed to know a redeeming feature of SHIELD was her handler's butt." Daisy snorted. "Though at least they're actually a thing now and not just circling each other and drowning everyone in sexual tension. And Mack's ass is almost as nice as his arms."
Darcy had enjoyed that interview. Elena of super speed may have insisted on a dumb ass mask for an interview. But it had been wonderfully viscous about the risks to Inhumans. Also she could see why her sister liked her team. "I don't know, some solid biceps and pecs sound like excellent incentives to me."
"You both are gross." Peter groaned.
He was saved by the elevator doors opening. Darcy put on her game face, it was one all humans in customer service learned, and marched out, her siblings following her like the loyal bookends they were. She walked directly to where a confused looking Steve was standing.
Steve had a towel hanging around his neck. Standing a couple paces from him was Sam, who was panting, large sweat stains on his workout gear, and general exhaustion as he squinted at Natasha. Which, Natasha was reading something to them off of a Starkpad. As they entered all three sets of eyes looked up.
"Sup!" Darcy greeted them while marching forward.
Steve squared himself like he was going to go into battle. But Natasha spoke before he could stick his foot in his mouth. "Ah, I was wondering when you would pay us a visit." Her lips were raised in amusement.
Darcy grinned. "You're totes my favorite Avenger after Thor." She stuck her hand out to Natasha. "Now how do you feel about negotiation on the topic of legal oversight for the Avengers?"
"You're the one who's been using Wanda for views." Steve's eyes narrowed as he stepped forward.
Surprisingly it was Sam who stopped Steve with a low whistle. "Impressive work."
"What?" Steve spun on Sam, confusion painted across his face.
Sam wiped a towel across his face while straightening fully. "Lagos was a shit show. And the kid needed some help and she doesn't work through angst by punching sand bags like you Cap. Besides, with her brother still at the farm her support network was us, and we've been chasing down Hydra."
"So that makes it alright to make a spectacle of her?" Steve's voice had a dangerous edge, but he was listening.
Darcy rolled her eyes. "Wanda got to apologize, make meaningful reparations, and she and Quake are training so that particular situation never happens again. The media is asking questions about at what age people should be allowed in combat no matter how enhanced. There's debate over whether there would have been more or less casualties if Wanda hadn't been there. But it's not just ripping her to shreds anymore."
"Well done." Sam huffed. "How did you get that reporter to start on a cross country survey of Inhumans and all the organizations legal and illegal trying to use them? Cause that's some impressive reading. I'm guessing you're responsible for Everhart turning General Ross into public enemy number 1 too?"
Daisy laughed. "That was me. Well acquiring the intel, Darcy picked who to give it to" She shrugged at the looks. "Intelligence work. Discredit the leaders of enemy action."
"It's certainly working." Sam looked impressed.
Natasha tipped her chin up slightly. "Rumor has it you're responsible for the bill that was just signed into law. Pushed it through while we were dark?"
"Steve would have tried to stop it." Darcy was unrepentant. She grinned. "So I brought powered back up cause research says you're the sort who needs to like, throw some punches before you can have a nice civilized negotiation Capsical."
Steve opened and then closed his mouth. Then he snorted. "Alright." He looked over at Daisy and Peter who looked far more impressive in their hero get ups than in pajamas, so a good choice to wear them. "Do I want to know how Dr Foster's assistant marshalled you?"
"She fixed my gauntlets and is the only one that can cook." Daisy laughed looking far too delighted at the prospect of being punched in the face by Captain America.
Peter bounced. "It's a real honor to meet you Mr America Sir."
"Huh." Steve took in the two and then waved them to the sparring mats. Which honestly it was better described as a basketball court sized sparring space, vaulted ceiling included. "Let's see what you two have."
Daisy strode after him. "Kid you go low I go high."
Ten minutes later as Captain America went flying into the wall, his legs webbed, Peter was holding his shield while sticking to the ceiling, Darcy just felt proud. Also who actually thought high flying acrobat type Peter would be the one going low while heavy hitter Daisy would go high? It would have been a terrible idea. Which is why it just wasn't how her siblings fought.
"You want to put Barnes on trial." Natasha drawled from besides her. The woman's eyes were definitely dissecting Peter and Daisy's fighting.
Darcy hummed. "One of you all has to face legal consequence, and his case is the clearest cut win. And the biggest indictment of the dangers to enhanced people."
"Your reasons for thinking that?" She asked, her voice far too conversational.
Darcy knew she was being sussed out. "He's a beloved war hero, has historic importance, was captured by evil mcevil, is white, male, and is super dreamy looking. Sure he's a scary assassin, but what kid hasn't played him at recess? For that matter I know I'm not alone in growing up with a Bucky Bear. He's a beloved American hero captured by evil Nazis and brainwashed by evil Russians only to then be sold back to evil Nazis. The noble hero, taken prisoner and turned against Captain America, his best friend, only to come back in from the cold. It's a damn Hallmark movie."
"And if something happens to him while he's in jail awaiting trial?" Natasha probed.
She couldn't help it, she stared at the other woman. "Really? Tony'll pay bail in exchange for Steve supporting that new UN resolution requiring the Avengers to ask before crossing international borders. And what judge is stupid enough to think a jail would hold someone the Avengers couldn't? Monitoring anklet and huge bail. I guarantee it."
"He will be deemed a flight risk." Though Natasha's eyes were crinkled in a way that said she probably approved. And if Darcy thought that then Natasha definitely meant for her to think that.
Darcy went with it and hoped Natasha was being genuine. "Again, you Avengers have street cred you just don't use. And rich people don't play by normal people rules. Barnes will be fine as long as someone does something to his hair so he doesn't look like a hobo. Maybe make him practice hurt puppy eyes for the jury. If one of you has to be brought up on charges he's the best option."
"You are a very dangerous young woman Doctor Lewis." Natasha's lips twitched up. "I see the family resemblance." And oh she knew the Stark thing. Natasha turned her attention back to where Steve was flying across the sparring floor only to dent the far wall...again. "I believe I should make this slightly more fair." Her eyes flicked to Darcy for a second. "I'll make sure he listens to you."
Darcy beamed, her cheeks heating in hero worship as the coolest Avenger went to go beat up her siblings. "She's so cool."
"Not gonna argue that." Sam agreed.
She looked at the man. "Not going to go join in?"
"You could not pay me to get involved with that. Quake and Nat are smiling. And I don't know about Quake but I know that's a bad sign when Nat does it." Sam held up his hands in surrender.
Darcy sniggered, he wasn't wrong.
////
May opened the front door of her home and took in the man standing on her doorstep. "You figured it out then?"
"I'm not used to being an idiot." Tony Stark replied, the slightly panicked edge to him was worn down by exhaustion and shock.
She stepped aside. "Well you better come in, I have some leftover meatloaf. Darcy helped make it so I know it's edible."
"Your house is...nice?" Tony said awkwardly as he unabashedly looked around. His eyes lit at the side table with Darcy and Peter's latest project. He stepped over and picked up the tech, turning it around. "Miniaturized collapsing drone."
"For the Spidersuit." May explained while pulling the meatloaf out of the fridge. "Do you want something to drink?"
Tony set the drone down. "I'm good." His nose wrinkled at the sight of the star spangled throw blanket. "So…"
"They're good kids." May set the plate of meatloaf in the microwave before turning to face the man. "Darcy's turning into their ring leader. Daisy, Daisy is so good and she cares deeply. Peter, he's still caught up in having siblings and getting to be a hero."
Tony twitched slightly. "Why not come to me?"
"Daisy will have to explain that to you." May wasn't even sure of the details, or probably more than the rough sparknotes. But she knew enough. "She had a rough childhood though, and her experience with parents isn't positive. Don't push her, she mostly likes you already. Peter would have come to you already, you're his hero. But he loves his sister and Daisy isn't ready."
Tony's brow furrowed and May found herself realizing that the man was her age. He looked his actual age standing in her living room chewing over the fact he had three kids. "I get why the Spawn is so dedicated to Enhanced rights. At this point I think she has a fleet of reporters on speed dial. Where she finds the time…"
"I don't know you well Mr Stark but I'd say she gets it from you." May wasn't stroking his ego either. All the kids were bright, passionate, and stubborn as mules when they got their heels dug in. The bath incident when Peter was three came to mind.
"I don't know how to be a...dad? I'm already doing everything wrong with the Spawn. But she's at least an adult, sort of. So's Quake or..Daisy? But the kid?" Tony's hands waffled at his side.
May smiled. "You just be there. And really if you tried to parent any of them they'd destroy you out of spite. Do you think I want Peter swinging around getting shot at?"
"Is that not appropriate? He seems capable? I just saw a video of him and Quake wiping the floor with Captain America's face." Tony genuinely looked confused.
She set her hands on her hips. "He's fourteen. He can't drive, vote, drink, smoke, or even go to some movies without an adult. He's a child."
"That seems slightly unreasona….I mean perfectly reasonable." Tony winced. "Should I be taking notes? This feels like I should be taking notes."
May sighed, god another one. "You're actually worse than Daisy with feelings aren't you?"
"That is entirely possible. My emotional development is inverse to my IQ." He seemed proud as he said that, horrifyingly.
May took the meatloaf out of the microwave and shoved it at him. "I'll get you some milk. And just… when you talk to Daisy just talk AIs. She is very impressed with FRIDAY. It will save you from the inevitable angst spiral." She felt like laughing, god she was the only adult in the entire damn family. "The Spidersuit is kind of Darcy and Peter's pet project and if you try to touch that they'll revolt. But if you work on the automated paintball traps Daisy has been making them help her with, they'll just fold you into the group."
"Paintball traps?" Tony's face brightened.
She was going to regret this, or well her laundry machine was going to regret it. "Daisy calls them non-lethal rounds. I think she just thinks it's funny to shoot her brother with sparkly pink paint. But by the time he turns eighteen no one is going to be able to so much as dream of shooting him." And May approved of this. Peter could whine about pink stains on his clothing all he wanted so long as he stayed safe and whole.
"I can do paintball robots." Tony nodded thoughtfully, his eyes getting that glaze of 'ideas' Darcy and Peter got sometimes.
May poured Tony Stark a glass of milk and then politely manhandled his squawking form into a chair at the table. "You have till five. Today's Peter's turn to bring snacks to his academic decathlon practice. So Daisy's driving him and will be kidnapped by teenagers and probably continue her quest of turning the nerds into the scariest kids in high school. And I know Darcy is getting margaritas with Jane. So you have three hours to ask questions and then I'm kicking you out so the kids don't catch you."
"Is this how you ended up with all three living with you?" Tony looked at her like he was afraid she'd attach a bib to him or something.
She considered that. "Your daughter was living in a van. Peter's sister. So I suppose I did just forcefully adopt her. Darcy on the other hand moved herself in to better be able to better command her siblings."
"She is kind of terrifying." Tony agreed.
May took a seat at the table across from him. "So how did you figure it out?"
"The kid high fived the Spawn. Then...well spending five minutes around Quake and the kid and it's clear they're siblings. I was actually preparing a shovel talk for Quake." Tony looked baffled at that. "Spawn was just so dedicated to helping Enhanced, and clearly her driving inspiration was Quake and the kid."
She bit back her amusement at that. It was ridiculous, but understandable. Because the thing was, besides some lovely bone structure, brown hair, and similar eyes in Peter and Daisy's case, the kids really didn't look that much alike. "They all take after their mothers except for Darcy."
"I'm getting that." Tony winced. "Are there anymore? I thought I was careful but...there's three of them."
May shook her head. "Not that pinged on every DNA list Daisy could get her mitts on."
"Which is all of them." Tony gave a slightly proud smirk. "She is good at computers."
May felt herself puffing with pride at the compliment towards Daisy's hacking. It was odd. But this was her life now. She was accepting that her honorary niece was teaching a teenage decathlon team how to kill a man with their pinkies. She had long since accepted illegal hacking as a skill to be proud of. If she could stick a certificate about it on the fridge she would. Actually. "Do Hackers or Agents have awards?"
"Yes and no?" Tony looked at her cautiously as if he could sense he wasn't going to like what was coming.
May took that to mean classified or weird online meme type things. "What about gyms. Do they have certificates and things?"
Tony blinked at her.
May's hands fell onto her hips as she stared at Daisy and Peter. "Why do you have a black eye young lady?"
"Freedom punched me in the face?" Daisy offered.
She pinched the bridge of her nose. "The bruising you're hiding under that hideous flannel you said you threw out last week?"
"The Black Widow kicked my ass?" Daisy looked positively dreamy.
Peter chirped in. "We totally won against Captain America though!"
May noted Peter was suspiciously bruise free. She pulled a startled Daisy into a hug. "You did good."
Daisy softened as she hugged her back.
May reached out and pulled Peter in. Pulling back she cupped each of their cheeks, looking between them. "Well, I guess you better tell me all about fighting Captain America and Black Widow." She sighed. "But first you better put some ice on that Daisy."
May batted Peter's hand away from the bread basket. "Not till the casserole is done."
"But it smells good!" Peter's eyes widened into his biggest most begging look. "I finished my homework!"
May pushed the bowl of peanuts towards him. "You can wait five minutes. And don't you have flashcards for your competition in DC next week?"
"Yes…" Peter bit at his lower lip. "But I was thinking, maybe I should quit decathlon? I mean it'd give me two more hours a week to do hero stuff."
She picked up the flashcards and set them in his hands. "But you love decathlon, and your friends are in it."
"But I could be training more! Or helping. I got three people out of that fire yesterday. That's more important." And the way Peter lit up at helping people was so like Ben it took her breath away.
Daisy spoke up from where she was doing something almost assuredly illegal on her laptop, while sitting in the window. "Kid you'll burn out. Besides, don't you want to get a doctorate like Darcy? Work in a fancy lab and everything?"
"Well yeah, but I can do more as Spiderman. And I've got these abilities, if I don't use them and bad things happen it's my fault." Peter's foot scuffed at the floor.
"No." Daisy's voice was sharp. "Ned knows the heimlich yes? Is he responsible to troll restaurants to use it for choking patrons?"
Peter huffed. "No."
"How many people do you think science inventions save?" Daisy had moved so that she was standing directly in front of Peter now.
Peter blinked. "Uh...millions. But-"
"No buts." Daisy held onto his shoulder. "How many people could you help as a scientist?"
He wilted slightly, though he still had a mullish set to his jaw as he crossed his arms. "A lot."
"And how many people will you be able to help if you burn out like I did?" She didn't flinch at Peter's eyes snapping to her face.
May held her breath. She wasn't entirely sure what to do. Of course grounding her nephew and banning him from being Spiderman till he was older was her first reaction. But it would never stick. Not really. She looked between the two siblings and stayed silent.
"What? But you didn't burn out...you're a hero." Peter was looking at her, a slight frown on his face now.
Daisy winced slightly. "I was putting my affairs in order when I found you kid." She paused, nobody saying anything But Peter was paling, "I wanted to die. When I left I...found the scariest enhanced serial killer I could find and when I couldn't beat him I told him to do it."
"But you said you would come back." Peter's voice cracked.
May was rooted to the spot. She'd guessed. But hearing was so much worse than guessing. And Daisy was solid and real. She should have pushed.
Daisy looked pained. "I didn't mean to, didn't think I was, but I lied. It was...this life takes and it takes and I have done things... " She ran a hand through her hair. "I...my whole life was SHIELD and it wasn't enough."
"Bullshit." May grabbed Daisy's face between her hands. "You are more than enough." She waited for the confused nod. Then she turned to Peter. "Now Peter you are going to stay in at least one afterschool club. I don't care which one but you're staying in it. You will have friends, go to school, get good grades, go to college, and have as normal of a life as you can while still doing the hero stuff. You will have a sleepover with Ned after the DC trip next week."
May turned back to Daisy. "And you are going to get a hobby that isn't hacking, training your brother, plotting with your sister, or in any way connected to heroing. Learn to knit or something, I don't care."
"Ok?" Daisy rubbed at one arm. "I just...I'm not trying to die anymore? I realized I wanted to come back. It's what I was trying to say. I burned out but I...had here to come back to."
Peter had grabbed onto Daisy's arm. His face still pale.
May closed her eyes and breathed out. "Heaven save me from heroes." She hauled both of her kids into a tight hug. "You both aren't allowed to die. Ever. New family rule."
"K." Peter mumbled while clinging just as tightly to both of them.
Daisy nodded against her. "Good rule."
They all jumped slightly as the fire alarm went off.
May grabbed the fire extinguisher and turned to face what should have been dinner. Damn.
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