章節 9: Greatest
"It's terrible."
I leaned back in my chair as I gazed over the first chapters of Reversal again.
It wasn't the forty chapters I wrote that helped, but the ten chapters from Great Wolf that I read changed the game for me.
After receiving a scathing review that almost seemed to be asking me to quit writing, I decided to read what the person produced.
Great Wolf was a very accomplished author on the platform. They didn't just have books with tens of thousands of followers but had also launched a new this month that wasn't so far away from that benchmark.
It was insane. A bigshot had rejected me upfront.
The plan to get my confidence back from a review swap had backfired. When I thought that no one said anything bad here, I was slapped across the face by a 'You suck.'
[What are you going to do now?]
The system window opened up in front of me.
When I looked at my chapters again, they all seemed horrible. But was it correct to just fix them like this?
Probably not.
Honestly, this was discouraging. It was so discouraging that one would have wanted to give up right here. That was what had happened with the piano, and with art, I had always given up.
But not this time.
Why…? I didn't know.
"I don't know…"
I splayed on my bed and stared at the ceiling.
My mind was not interested in it. My chest ached while my lips were stuck in a tight frown.
But my fingers twitched.
Even now…
"I still want to write."
[See. I told you. It is all because of my advice back then.]
"What do you mean? This is happening because of following your advice."
[You are too deep in to quit now, host. Before you might have read what you need to do. But now that you have made the mistakes yourself, you will truly start to 'learn.']
I was at a loss for words at the System's message.
All this time before, I was simply trying to follow a path. Just trying out what other people said I should.
I was merely reading things. Whether it was for the art or whether it was the piano. I was never really treating it with sincerity.
I never really learned.
"Bastard. You got me this time…"
A month had passed since I had started writing already. And here I was, facing another setback yet not ready to give up.
This had never happened with anything I tried before. Heck, I hadn't even told my mother that I was writing. Just the thought of telling her that I was writing made my spine shiver.
Even bringing friends home was scary. I always worried that they might ask me to reconsider my connections or that they would insult my friends, that had always been the case.
Would they scoff? Would they laugh at me?
No, it would be something worse. They'd probably talk behind my back, saying it's just a phase. Things would be messy if they got angry. I mean, saying you are trying to be a writer was already pretty bad, if I said I wanted to be a webnovel author it'll go straight to hell.
I stretched my hand to the ceiling and sighed.
This was… quite the situation.
Not the review, not the writing.
But the way my thoughts were swirling around my head. It was foreign to me. A feeling I hadn't experienced before.
"You know, system? I used to think that someone would just click someday in life."
[…]
"That when I find my passion, I'd just know it in my heart and my head. That it will just feel right…"
I closed my fist and placed it down next to me.
"I was pretty wrong. Things like those happen and you don't even realize it. Like love, I guess? You don't know when you fall, and when you realize it is already too late."
[Like love… yes.]
"Hm…" I pushed off the bed and sat up. "Even if people laugh at me or scoff behind my back… even if I get a dozen scathing reviews or comments… Even if I suck at it, I don't want to stop."
It was already too late for me. Way too late.
I had fallen deep. Deep enough to not know what went wrong. Where it all went wrong.
The mistake that I had made had already started consuming my life, inside out. It had captured the deepest depths of me.
Of course, it would take over the rest as well.
"I don't even remember the last time I thought that life was bland. Not since I started writing."
[Do you wish to learn, host?]
I shook my head.
"That much is not enough."
I was still scared, I was still skeptical.
What if it doesn't work out? Is it even possible?
Those problems were around, but I would act in spite of them.
"I want to become the Greatest Webnovel Author ever."
[Congratulations! You have met all the requirements.]
[The Greatest Webnovel Author System has chosen you as its master]
[The Greatest Webnovel Author System has been truly unlocked]
[Goal: Become the Greatest Webnovel Author]
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