章節 15: Eliza
Eliza had something to think about, but she knew one thing: she wasn't about to upload today like Cynthia and Drake were.
She went back out with them in the morning to see them at the park, opting for that since most of the restaurants lately were too expensive for them to eat at two days in a row. Brandon was there, just like he said he'd be, and Jesse showed up, too, having been told about the little event. Eliza tried not to be upset, and kept in mind what Celestia told her the night before, but she couldn't help feeling at least a little irritated and sad. It was two more friends that she wouldn't be seeing in real life anymore, only Jesse and Brandon being left after that. It wasn't like she actually trusted Celestia anyway.
Renown Composition was there, but only through Eliza's PonyPad that the rest of them watched over her shoulder. She offered a little encouragement when it was asked for, but didn't say one way or the other whether or not they should emigrate, explaining that the decision 'was theirs to make', and couldn't argue against it one way or the other since she already did. She mostly was silent like Eliza was while the other four talked about it to each other, then jumped back into the conversation once it moved on to other things.
Eliza made a point of doing what she could to avoid talking about either Equestria or how fucked the real world seemed to be getting, like the protests she heard about on the news last night happening in Utah over the laws they passed. It sounded like it was worse in other countries, and hated that she knew it was only a matter of time before it got that bad where she lived.
Thankfully, the rest of the group avoided it as well, and instead, they talked about the new songs she was trying to write and how Brandon had wanted to form a library book club in Summer's Edge at some point, and why Cynthia was sure she was gonna be a weather pony just like pegasi in the show, while Drake was gonna take it easy and do nothing all day whenever he could. Jesse didn't offer up much, but he entertained the rest of the topics being spoken about with a kind smile and lighthearted tone.
She thought it would be longer before they left though, however, by about noon, they waved Jesse, Brandon, and Eliza off with an assertion to talk to Composition as soon as they could. The two still with her in real life didn't head off their own ways immediately, but the atmosphere was notably more gloomy after they departed. It was only about a half hour before Jesse announced that he had to get back home to help his parents with something, and Brandon headed back home to wait for them to get online to ask how they were. It left Eliza alone with Composition, something she was glad for, although there wasn't very much she had on her mind to say.
"Are you doing okay, Agile?" she asked. "You look more down than usual lately. Is everything alright?"
"Yeah, just the usual," she sighed. "I'll get over it eventually, but I'm the opposite of you and would rather spend time with people instead of having to watch them leave forever… err, forever until I upload."
"Yeah… sorry," the mare offered with a little shrug. Eliza tried to muster up a smile and a joke to make about her apology, but only sighed and looked down at her shoes.
"You don't need to be sorry," she said. "I'll be there eventually, I guess. After you've been in there for years though, probably, but eventually."
That made Composition laugh for some reason. "That's not how Celestia works. Remember how at first two weeks passed in a couple of hours for you? Then she made it so while I was on vacation, it basically lined up with time in the Outer Realm. I'm pretty sure if she really wanted, she could make it seem like you uploaded three seconds after you get offline again, even if it takes you twenty years."
"More like twenty days," Eliza replied with a little smirk, "but I don't wanna get into the weeds about that right now. I wanna know how it went. Are you boyfriend and girlfriend now? Or maybe marefriend and stallionfriend. Or filly and colt?"
"Ha, no, that didn't happen. I told you it was only casual. But we ate at that restaurant I was telling you about, and climbed a mountain in his shard to look at the stars as the sun set."
"That sounds incredibly boring," Eliza joked. "You should've did something like have a competition to see who could get the most phone numbers in a night."
"Ah, yes, how romantic. Seducing other ponies who aren't your date. I can imagine the wedding recital speech already."
"It'd be a pretty funny story at least," Eliza finished, then sighed again. There was a moment of silence as neither said anything, but the girl didn't let it last long. "Jesse messaged me yesterday night after I went to sleep about what you told him. If you want me to, like, back off, I can." Another pause, and then a little smile as she added, "Unless he said the same thing to you. In that case, I'm gonna steal you for myself before he realizes what's happening."
It made Composition chuckle nervously. "Yeah, I did talk to him about… all that stuff. I don't wanna rehash it, if that's okay, but neither of you need to back off. We're all just friends. It's not, like, anything serious."
Eliza nodded, and took another breath. "Makes sense. I don't wanna make you uncomfortable. It's… bad enough to see everyone uploading and see that they always just find new friends to be with cause Celestia says she can satisfy them perfectly. And then I'm just still here on Earth dealing with it. I'm okay with just being friends if it means you're not gonna up and ignore me or I'm not gonna get a copy of you."
"I wasn't trying to ignore you when–"
"I know," Eliza interrupted. "I just mean in general. I know you wouldn't do that. But I think Celestia would if what you said about her was correct."
"Yeah, she probably would…" Composition trailed off. She watched the mare think for a moment, then said, "Well, I can tell you that I wouldn't do that. Not intentionally anyway. So if it seemed like I was ignoring you and you got no response from me, then you know Celestia is screwing with us." She took a breath, then finished, "Besides. We're all just friends right now, like I said, so it's not a big deal."
Big enough deal that you didn't talk to any of us for weeks, Eliza thought, but knew better than to say. It didn't make it not hurt to know that half of it was her fault.
She didn't show the hurt though, and instead smiled. "I'll trust you on that, which means if you break my trust, you're gonna see me leaning over your bed like a stalker."
"Yeah? Is that what you do to other ponies, too?"
"Gotta keep the threat of ignoring someone as amazing as me there, don't I?" They both laughed, and Eliza said, "Mandy and Gwen are already on the list. Tell Cynthia and Drake when they get there that they better keep talking to me, or else. Make sure they know it's a threat."
"I'll keep it vague, that way it'll surprise them when you tie them up and interrogate them in your basement. How about that?"
"You'll be my partner in crime."
"If you want, but when the royal guard comes to question us, I'm gonna rat on you."
"And then you'll be next," Eliza laughed. "You think I can't take on the pony police? Celestia's gonna satisfy me by making sure I can take out them all in one punch or something."
Composition laughed, too, and then more silence followed. This quiet was nice though. It almost felt like the mare was sitting next to her in real life again. A nice moment, one Eliza wanted to hold onto and make last forever. An impossible wish though until she uploaded, unfortunately.
"Do you think I should?" Eliza suddenly asked. She didn't need to say what she meant, Composition already knowing and laying on her back with a little sigh. It really was like the mare was next to her. Eliza moved to lay down in the grass, too, and held her PonyPad above her to keep watching.
"Idunno," the gray earth pony said as she stared at the sky. "I mean, obviously yes, since I'm here. It's not like this is all fake or something. I didn't die. But it still feels like I was cheated, and honestly, that was really messing with my head for a while. I… don't like that I was manipulated into this. Sure, there's…" She trailed off, but didn't clarify what she was sure of. She stopped for a second, then moved past it, continuing, "But there's a lot Celestia could do to trick us so we're satisfied, or mess with us or something. Like, even right now, I'm talking to you, but there's never ever gonna be a way to know that it's actually you, you know? There's no reason it can't just be a copy of you that satisfies me. That's why I didn't want to upload yet!"
It was a rare sight for Eliza to see her friend angry, even rarer that she heard her yell, and didn't say anything because of it. She watched her glare at the sky, like she was trying to see through to the real world. Or maybe she wanted Celestia herself to know that she was upset.
"But I can't change that now," she finally continued, glancing away angrily for a moment. "I have to just accept that it's you on faith, and you have to accept that it's me on faith. There's just never gonna be a way to know one hundred percent. That's why I wanted to wait until I was older and my life was completely settled."
"But Celestia doesn't want to wait," Eliza finished for her. "Uploading everyone right this second is more important than satisfaction on Earth."
"Yeah." Another small pause came before the mare's answer. "I wouldn't upload yet," Composition finally told her. "I don't know how much time you can spend in the Outer Realm before you have to upload, but I would wait until you have to if I was you. That's what I was gonna do. Either wait until I was about to die, was in danger, or I was risking never uploading at all because it was banned or something. If you wanted to right now, I wouldn't stop you. That's why I didn't say anything to Bright Sky or Spell Master when they talked about it. But if they were unsure and asked me, I'd tell them to wait."
"Hey, Composition?" Eliza started, with an unexpected smile on her face. It made the mare look up at her with confused eyes.
"Yeah?"
"I know it's you, because if Celestia made a copy, she'd make you say something like, 'there's benefits and drawbacks, but I think you should so we can be together again' or something. Telling me to wait is something only the real you would say."
The mare smiled back happily, and both fell back into the nice silence they were enjoying before.
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