章節 1: Chapter 1: The Psychiatrist of Arkham Asylum
Arkham Asylum.
The new psychiatrist was introducing himself to the patient before him.
"I come from a very terrible place, where there's practically nothing—no food, no water, no fine wine, and no women!"
"Of course, that's not the worst part. The worst part is that I have seven siblings, and we were all trapped there together!"
"I never really liked them, and sometimes I even wanted to slaughter them, but... it's difficult!"
"I was trapped in that place for many, many years until I arrived here not too long ago. Honestly, I quite like it here."
"By the way, my name is Samuel Kade. You can call me Dr. Samuel, because from now on, I'll be the psychiatrist here!"
"Today's my first day at work, so please be kind to me!"
Smiling, Samuel Kade extended his hand to the patient.
The patient didn't reach out, as he was tied to the chair opposite him, unable to move at all.
The reason for this was that this guy had just killed his psychiatrist with a pen yesterday!
So for the new psychiatrist's safety, the guards tied him to the chair.
Oh!
Almost forgot to mention, this patient was none other than the infamous villain in the DC Universe: the Joker.
A man as crazy as he was charming!
"Sorry, I forgot you can't shake hands."
Samuel Kade chuckled and lowered his hand.
The Joker stared at the unfamiliar man before him without any anger, but rather with a look of interest.
Because that introduction was just too intriguing.
Finally, he spoke up.
"From what you're saying, it sounds like you're from hell?"
The Joker asked.
"You guessed it!"
Samuel Kade nodded.
"So how did you get out?"
The Joker asked with a smile.
"Well, you could say it was an escape."
Samuel Kade rubbed his chin.
"Do you want to go back? After all, from what you said earlier, it seems like you really hate your siblings. If I were you, I'd go back and slaughter them."
The Joker grinned.
"Honestly, I've considered it before, but that place is a bit special. If I go back, I might not be able to leave again, so I won't consider it for now."
"And my siblings are really hard to kill, you wouldn't understand!"
Samuel Kade shook his head.
"Hard to kill? Nothing is hard to kill for me! As long as they're human, I can kill them."
A twisted smile appeared on the Joker's face.
"What if they're not human?"
Samuel Kade laughed.
The Joker's eyes flashed with surprise at the response, as his intuition told him that the man before him wasn't lying!
But how could that be possible?
If his siblings weren't human, then was he not human either?
Interesting...
"Mr. Samuel, do you know the purpose of your visit here?"
The Joker continued to ask.
"Of course!"
Samuel Kade nodded.
"It's because you killed your previous psychiatrist with a pen yesterday. But honestly, I think you're quite normal."
Hmm?
Hearing this, the Joker's spirits were lifted, as this was the first time anyone had ever called him normal.
However, in the next second, he heard Samuel Kade continue:
"Don't misunderstand, I'm only referring to your thought process. Because your original plan was to kill the psychiatrist and any replacements until you'd have Batman come to see you, which theoretically is correct!"
"But unfortunately, I'm the one who came!"
...
The Joker fell silent upon hearing this.
That's because Samuel Kade was right—he had indeed planned it that way...
He just didn't know how this man before him knew about his plan!
Before he could ask, Dr. Samuel spoke up again.
"You suffer from schizophrenia, dissociative identity disorder, psychomotor agitation, borderline personality disorder, and a range of other mental illnesses!"
"The chances of all these disorders occurring in one person are extremely low, almost like winning the lottery!"
"By the rules, I have to prescribe you some medication."
Dr. Samuel said, picking up a pen and writing down the names of some drugs on a piece of paper – just the usual medications for treating mental illnesses.
After writing, Dr. Samuel casually placed the pen on the table in front of him.
The Joker glanced at the pen on the table, and a flash of madness appeared in his eyes.
But before he could make a move, Dr. Samuel's voice rang out again.
"I advise you not to do that, because I genuinely enjoy this job, and so far, I don't want to kill you!"
"Wow!"
Upon hearing this, the Joker instantly grinned.
The next moment, he placed both of his hands on the table.
"When did you know that I had already broken free from my restraints?" The Joker asked.
"That's not important. What's important is that I'm not actually your enemy. On the contrary, I think we might become friends!" Dr. Samuel smiled.
Friends?
Upon hearing this, the Joker felt as if he had just heard something amusing.
"My last friend was pushed off a 50-story building by me, the one before that was stabbed to death by me, and the one before that was run over by a truck driven by me!"
"So now, do you think you can still be my friend?" The Joker asked with a sinister smile.
"Of course!" Dr. Samuel replied nonchalantly, "Trust me, I can't die."
"You're quite interesting…"
No sooner had he spoken than the Joker grabbed the pen on the table and lunged at Dr. Samuel's eyes.
Although Dr. Samuel instantly noticed the Joker's move, he made no action to dodge, not even blinking.
The pen stopped less than an inch from his eye.
"You're right; we can indeed be friends because you're as mad as I am!" The Joker smiled.
He then placed the pen back on the table.
"Good thing you didn't actually want to attack just now, or I might have really killed you, and then I might lose this job," Dr. Samuel said casually, putting the pen in his pocket.
To others, this might sound absurd, but the Joker knew Dr. Samuel was not lying.
If he had indeed attacked just now, Dr. Samuel might have killed him in an instant…
It was a strange feeling.
He didn't even know why he was having these thoughts…
Soon after, the Joker's actions caught the attention of the prison guards.
The next moment, the door was pushed open.
Seven or eight fully armed guards rushed in, pinning the Joker to the table!
But the Joker didn't care; he just looked at Dr. Samuel and asked, "So, will we meet again?"
"Of course, after all, starting today, I am the psychiatrist here!" Dr. Samuel said with a smile, then walked out with large strides.
At that moment, the Joker behind him let out a bizarre laugh.
It was as if he was celebrating that the world had gained another madman just like him…
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