章節 12: Out of the comfort zone

"I did what I did because I wanted to. I don't feel obliged after we… slept together. If that's what's bothering you." He finished.

His words startled her at first, as she was not expecting him to feel that way towards Sean, and especially not expecting him to talk about how he felt after they slept together. She managed to stay relaxed and nodded. He's telling me what he feels, she thought, I have to be honest too.

"I'm not mad that you kissed me back there. I—I was scared if any rumors started spreading…" she was glad to have something to busy herself with, so she pretended to be extra concentrated on the task.

"I don't care about that."

"But what if they start thinking we're dating and—" she started, but was interrupted mid-sentence.

"I don't care," he made a pause between words. "But—"

"Do you?" he interrupted her, feeling his heart tighten at her insistence.

"No!" she answered almost immediately, half screaming and snapping her gaze at him.

Her rushed answer only made him feel more confused about how she felt. For him, there were two options: she did feel good under his touch but didn't feel anything else besides that physical attraction, or she was attracted to him physically AND had also felt a connection beyond it. He, who have had many flings, had never felt something like that before. Something that made him crave for more the moment it was over. And it was not only about the sex, but the warmth and peace he felt being near her.

Allen placed his free hand over hers, making her drop the cotton she had on her finger, and squeezed it. His eyes narrowed, making his gaze turn hard and serious. I have to know, he thought.

"Why did you leave?" He asked her with a husky voice. "That day, when I woke up, you were not there." His deep voice echoed on the wall.

Oh, right. She thought, a sudden wave of embarrassment hit her, making her blush and bite her lower lip.

"I didn't want to be clingy… because it was just sex," she admitted.

"I—" his heart started beating fast at the realization of the words he was about to say. "Felt disappointed." He struggled to choose those words, admitting the truth to her and to himself.

She looked at him with wide eyes. She noticed his ears turned slightly red, even though his face was inexpressive. How can he feel embarrassed but still have a poker face? The wild thought crossed her mind. Her heart skipped a beat.

His mind was running faster than he could process, dozens of thoughts pilling up in his brain. He was nervous again, not knowing what she felt. Not even knowing what he felt for sure; or maybe he did, but he was just trying to ignore it.

She was about to say something, but his anxiety over it spoke first.

"Did you… Not like it?" he asked her, now his cheeks tinting red too. So fucking embarrassing, he thought, but I need to know. It's killing me.

She melted for a second, not being able to answer right away. His gaze was steady, his body stiff as if waiting for a blow.

"Allen," hearing his name come out of her lips, engulfed in her sweet voice, felt completely new. It was the first time she called him by his name, and he liked how it sounded. "It meant a lot. It was perfect."

"It was?" he asked, his eyes softening.

Suddenly, he looked like a little child: full of insecurities and too embarrassed of his own feelings to admit them. His eyes were bright, shinning; she could see herself reflected in them. His dark, long eyelashes framed them beautifully, highlighting the pale blue color of his gaze. His body shifted, relaxing a little.

She nodded, smiling shyly. Even though at some point she was going to keep that information to herself, especially because she thought he wouldn't care about how she felt about it, she realized it was wrong to just disregard her feelings. And now, knowing he had been worrying about it too, she felt comfortable enough to say it out loud.

"I'm glad it was you."

Her words left her mouth, leaving his heart hammering so hard it almost hurt. It felt uncomfortable inside his chest, and it spread down to his stomach. He was not nervous, yet he couldn't point out what that feeling was about.

"I'm glad it was me," he murmured. The words slid out straight from his brain to his mouth, no filter on them.

Did I hear that right? She thought, feeling a knot form in her stomach as she realized, by the look on his face, he was shocked by his own words too.

Allen stood up at lightning speed, releasing her hand, looking around to find the door.

"I—I have to go." He said, walking fast towards the door. She followed him from behind, still confused about his reaction. He reached the door, but waited for her to open it.

"Are you OK?" She asked, searching for his eyes, stretching her arm to grab the door knob.

He looked down at her gaze in an attempt to pretend everything was good, but it didn't last long, though. He could not hold it for more than two seconds. "Yeah—I just have to—" he let the words die as he sprinted out the moment she opened the door, reaching his car in a couple of seconds.

Isabelle blinked a few times, gasping a little at his sudden hurry; making her heart flutter and shrink at the same time. Her eyes dropped to the floor, mixed feelings flooding her chest.

Allen opened the door, but his muscles came to a sudden stop, not moving for almost a whole minute. He clenched his jaw. Fuck it, he thought as he turned and strode back to her. She was still at the door, waiting for him to leave, when his rushing footsteps made her raise her face up. He stood in front of her a couple of seconds, breathing in and out nervously, his hands fidgeting at his side.

Allen cleared his throat. "Thank you," he said, lifting his right hand. Isabelle opened her mouth to answer, but he took one step closer, making her choke on her words before saying anything. "And—" he leaned down and planted a fast kiss on her cheek. He stepped back and, shifting his eyes from the ground to her hazel ones, he added, "See you at school."

The girl only had time to nod, when he was already walking back to his car. He jumped inside and looked back right as he was driving away.

She was waving goodbye.

He felt his heart tighten at her sight drifting away, but for a reason he could not understand, his heart didn't feel as heavy as it always did. Something was different, he could tell.

Her side of the story

"Something on your mind, honey?" Her mother's sweet voice made her snap back to reality. She was so immersed thinking about what happened today, she forgot she was having dinner with her parents. She raised her eyes from the dinner plate and looked at her.

Her mom looked just like her, the only thing she had from her dad was her beautiful hazel eyes and tiny round nose.

She shook her head. "A little," she said, shrugging, followed by a smile. "I think it's time to cut my hair a little." she grabbed a lock of her hair, inspecting it.

"It's been over a year since you last cut it." Her mother replied, reaching a glass of water to her lips.

"Why don't you take this Saturday to go?" Her father's nasal and deep voice made them turn their eyes to his way. "Uncle Clarke called me earlier to invite me to a new fishing spot."

Isabelle's mother laughed. "You mean tomorrow?" she asked, closing her eyes a little.

The mid-aged man looked up, thinking, and then rolled his eyes with a smile. Her mom looked at her. "It's good for me! We can go early if you have something planned with MJ and Cass."

She swallowed what she was chewing before answering. "No rush, we had something up for Sunday," she grinned. "We can have a full all-girls day."

"That'd be lovely," her mother sighed. "It's been a while since we spent some time just the two of us."

"True…"

"Oh, by the way. How's your friend doing?" Her eyes darted towards the plate, playing with her food.

"Cass is great! MJ came along yesterday, so you already know he's doing great." Isabelle replied, knowing her mother was not asking for any of them.

"I mean your other friend. The one you told me got hurt helping you?" Her dark brown eyes landed on her daughter and grinned.

"What friend? What happened?" Her father leaned a little over the table, showing interest.

"It's a friend from school. He helped me out when—" she stopped, not wanting to mention her ex. "When some random guy was trying to mess with me." She looked at her mother. "Oh and… Yeah, he's good… I think…" she shrugged.

"You haven't asked him? It's already nighttime."

"Well, I haven't talked to him after he left."

"You should text him, then," her father said, grabbing his empty plate and standing up from the table. "After all, he did help you."

"Definitely. It's the least you can do." Her mother also stood up and went to the kitchen.

She followed them with her gaze, thinking about what they had just said. After today's conversation, it's stupid I'm still overthinking about texting him, she thought, but as she grabbed her phone, her confidence started to plump down. It was just too much for her to handle right now, so she stood up and helped out in the kitchen.

After about an hour, she finally took a shower and hopped on her bed. She had to finish something for next week's homework, so she grabbed her laptop and started working on it. That, until her sneaky fingers mechanically typed Allen's name in the SM's search bar. The same photo from last time emerged and covered the screen.

A heavy sigh escaped her lips, grabbing her phone and opening his chat.

It was completely empty, as they had never chatted before.

I: "Hi! Just wanted to make sure your hand is alright. :)"

Her thumb made circles over the send button for around ten seconds, when she finally sent it.

創作者的想法
XanaTrygg

I hope you're enjoying this story! If so, please let me know in the comments or throught your review! If not, critics are always welcome, too. Thank you for your support!

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