章節 6: The Way It Used to Be

Bella had returned to her motel room again. She was very tired that day, especially because of the emotional burden of being with Reef. She threw her bag on the bed, followed by her tired body. Lying on the motel bed that was not as comfortable as her Upper West Side apartment bed, she recalled what had happened that day.

"Damn it!" she exclaimed at the ceiling. "What were you thinking, Bella?"

She remembers Reef's kiss in her former bedroom, and the reaction of her body that could not lie, finally welcoming the kiss. How long had they been doing it? Bella didn't even realize it. When Reef finally broke the kiss, the man looked at her with a small smile.

"So you actually remember everything, Bella. You haven't forgotten a single detail about us. We still kiss the same way. I memorized the tremble of your body, the sigh of your breath, the way you draped your arms around my neck and the caress of your fingertips on my nape." Reef's eyes flashed. "You're still the girl I knew back then."

"I didn't mean to...." Bella's face heated up. "You kissed me, Reef! Can you not seduce me?" Bella moved, trying to break away. However, Reef's hands locked her waist. Reef's body was still pressing against her body. Reef's thigh pressed against her thigh felt so intimate. Bella was ashamed to admit that she liked that closeness. Her whole body craved for the warmth that once belonged to her.

"I won't let you go," Reef whispered in her ear. "Until you admit that you also want what we just did."

"You started it first!"

"You reciprocated, Bel. You also kissed me like a thirsty one. If I hadn't pressed you against the wall, your hands would have been everywhere." Reef smiled mockingly.

"It was just a physical reaction. I'm a grown woman now. Of course it's because...." Bella paused to take a breath. "Okay, maybe I want you physically too. Like I said, I'm a grown woman now, and you... you're a handsome man. But that doesn't mean it has anything to do with our past."

"You're still not tired of denying." Reef sounded disappointed. His cold demeanor had returned.

"Reef, what exactly do you want from me? Can't we just be friends, please? We can't get back together."

"Why? Because I'm still not worthy of you, a famous writer who is rich and lives a metropolis lifestyle?"

"I never looked down on you, then or now."

"Tell that to the girl who abruptly dumped me and left without saying goodbye eight years ago."

"Reef, we can't go back because I'm no longer the girl you knew eight years ago. While you... a part of you hates me and hasn't forgiven me yet."

When Reef drove her back to the motel, they were silent the whole way. Bella got off and thanked him, Reef just nodded back. The car had already left the motel grounds before Bella opened the lobby door.

Now, in her motel room, Bella is still busy cursing herself for being so easily swayed by Reef's charms. Then, her cell phone rings. Mariel tells Bella that Brenda invited them to dinner at her house.

***

"Come on, Bel, tell me what you two did in that house!" exclaimed Brenda excitedly. At their school, Brenda had her own program on the school radio, specializing in the latest gossip among the students. Brenda had a talent for being a good gossip. That's why she was both hated and loved by the students.

Sitting on the kitchen counter with a cold can of beer in hand, Mariel grinned. They had just finished dinner. The dining table had been cleared. Brenda's children had gone upstairs to their rooms. James and Charlie were chatting on the back porch.

"Never mind, Brenda. You already know what they're doing."

Bella sighed in annoyance. Even though her two friends had been teasing her about going out with Reef, she didn't regret hanging out with them that night. The house felt warm and familiar. The house had belonged to Brenda's parents, gifted to Brenda after she got married. Brenda's parents had moved to California to enjoy retirement. In the past, besides Mariel's house and Bella's house, it was also a frequent gathering place for girls after school.

"Nothing happened. He kissed me. That's all."

"Really?" Mariel sneered in disbelief.

"Wait. You mean, you guys kissed?" Brenda raised an eyebrow.

"No, I didn't. I mean, he kissed me. He did it." Bella retorted.

"And you didn't reciprocate? Didn't enjoy it either?" Both her friends chuckled. "Who are you lying to? We know best what you two were doing on the back of the school bus, every time we came back from the inter-school football tournament! You kept kissing until we were worried you'd die of breathlessness."

Bella smiled blandly at Brenda's remark. Of course she hadn't forgotten. It was one of her most enjoyable moments with Reef.

"If you didn't want him to touch you, you should have told him." Mariel said. "You have the right to refuse. We're all adults now and have our own lives. If you think the past is over, tell Reef about it. Say no, if he pushes you. Tell him to accept reality, no matter how angry he is with you for what you did in the past."

"Just saying goodbye," Brenda continued. "No, no. I'm not telling you to go back to the Big Apple immediately. I still miss you, darling, and I want you to stay in Saco again for good. I mean, you have to say goodbye to the past."

"I can't say goodbye to Reef. Not now." Bella grimaced.

"Why? Do you want back to him?"

"It's not like that, Mariel. But it's about that house. Red House." Her two friends looked at her with confused faces. Bella looked down. "Well. I have to tell you the truth. I decided to postpone my return after hearing that Red House had changed ownership to Reef. I thought the house still belonged to Mrs. Lopez. I mean, I thought she was still alive. Mariel, do you remember our phone conversation a few months ago? You said that if Mrs. Lopez decided to live in a nursing home one day, the house would probably be sold. Since then, I've been intending to buy it."

"Yes. I remember. But it turned out that Mrs. Lopez lived in that house until the end of her life. Oh, Bella. What a pity! You should have told me about your intention to buy the house back, so that I could have informed you when Mrs. Lopez passed away. You could have made an offer before Reef!"

Bella shook her head. "I couldn't make an offer before Reef. Mrs. Lopez's will asked her lawyer to make the first offer to Reef. Unfortunately for me, Reef immediately accepted and bought it."

"Wait! So, you didn't immediately return to New York to persuade Reef?"

"Exactly."

"Damn, I thought you stayed because you missed me!"

"I do miss you, Mariel darling."

"Do you think you can persuade Reef to release it to you?" Brenda asked. "I think he really likes the house."

"I should give it a try."

"Do you really want to buy the house?" Mariel looked unsure. "Do you really want to live in this small town again, after all the success you've had so far?"

"Of course not. My life is there now. And that's what I've been trying to tell Reef since we met again."

"Then why do you want to buy that house if you're not going to live here?"

"I don't know. But, it's my childhood home. My parents bought Red House when I was one year old," Bella said. "I love that house very much. And I always miss my late mom, and I even miss my late Aunt Ruth. Red House holds more memories of them than our second home. Did you know, Reef still uses Aunt Ruth's favorite old refrigerator and keeps my mom's mannequins in her former sewing room?"

"Then you should tell Reef right away. So that Reef doesn't think you're still here to give him hope."

"He did think about that, and when I denied it he got angry. It would be weird if I contacted him again right now to talk."

Mariel clucked impatiently. "You two are really like high school kids. Grow up!"

"I already did!" Brenda interrupted as she held up her phone and showed the chat app on its screen. "I just asked him if we could have a barbecue at the Red House for a little reunion while Bella is here. He said yes!"

"That's your chance." Mariel turned to Bella. "If you want to persuade him to sell you the house, this time you should talk to him, instead of being swept away by his charms." Mariel winked mischievously, then took a sip of her beer.

***