章節 38: 38. Ch 38- One On One
(A/N: Hey, everyone. Sorry about this being late. I'm back at Uni now, and as anyone who has ever been to university will tell you, one of the first things that is pretty much bound to happen is you'll get Freshers Flu. It's nothing serious, but it's thrown me off, so I've needed a few days to rest, but I'm alright now. Hopefully, I should be able to maintain my current upload schedule, but if I don't… blame lectures, I guess?
Thanks for reading once again, and enjoy!)
For Lincoln Loud, the rest of the day had been… tense, to say the least. He had tried to speak with Lynn before Dream Boat, but she had told him that they would meet later, once everyone else was asleep, so that they wouldn't be interrupted. Though he had agreed, he noticed how she pretty much didn't talk to him for the rest of the day, which only made him feel more nervous about their forthcoming confrontation. His sisters had noticed a couple of times, during Dream Boat and dinner, how he seemed on edge, but he would tell them that he was fine. Even when Lucy, ever the perceptive one, would ask him if things were okay between him and Lynn, he would assure her that everything was okay, and that she didn't need to worry about it. Even though she didn't fully believe him, she left the issue alone, leaving him to distract himself for the last few hours before their parents would enforce bedtime.
Lynn found herself unknowingly having no easier a time than Lincoln. Lynn had always been someone who preferred actions to words, but she knew that this wasn't the kind of situation where she could do some big gesture to let Lincoln know how she felt. Truth be told, she was still trying to fully figure out how she felt in the final hours before she was scheduled to meet with her little brother, this situation being a first for her. The only conclusion she was able to reach, in between telling Lucy to buzz off and that she was fine, was that the only way she could really deal with this was to talk with Lincoln. While she'd be lying out of her rear end if she said she was looking forward to it, she did want to clear the air between them, and not leave it any longer.
Eventually, dusk fell over Royal Woods, and the Loud siblings had made their way to their rooms, ready to call it a night. The athlete of the family waited a few minutes, knowing that if she went down too quickly, her parents would demand they go back to bed, and while they could have talked in Lincoln's room, his room was too small, and the walls were too thin, so talking downstairs was their best option. Once she was confident enough that the rest of her siblings were asleep, she sat up, slipping her legs out from her bed so she could put her feet into her slippers, and stood up. Looking over at Lucy, she saw that her bed coffin… thing was shut, and she knew that thing was close to soundproof, so she wouldn't be an issue.
Quietly, she tiptoed her way towards the door, wincing at the slight creak it gave off which made her hold her breath, but after a few seconds with no response, she exhaled and continued on her way. Tiptoeing to the staircase, she carefully and quietly descended to the living room, then turned into the dining room, where she could see her brother was already waiting for her, two glasses in hand.
"Oh!" She quietly exclaimed, surprised at his punctuality. "I, uh… kind of figured I was gonna be waiting for you."
He simply shook his head and told her, "I didn't want to keep you waiting. Figured it would be best not to… drag it out any further, I guess." She gave a nod to him, feeling her nerves return. "Do you… want some water?"
"Uh… sure, go for it." She watched as he turned towards the sink, turning on the tap and allowing the cold water to fill up the two glasses before turning it off again, then handed one glass to her. "Thanks. So… couch?"
"Okay." He followed his next oldest sister into the living room, sitting down beside her and taking a small sip of water before setting the glass down on the coffee table and looking at her, the moonlight poking through the half-curtained window giving him just enough view of her expression- conflicted, but definitely not happy. "So… is there anything you want to say first?"
"Honestly? I don't even know where to begin with all this." She gave a small shake of her head, then took a quick sip from her own glass before speaking again. "This is honestly a lot to take in, Linc. Even after thinking about it for, like, two straight hours, I don't know what I'm supposed to feel." He could make out that her frown was becoming apparent on her face, a sigh escaping her lips. "I know we haven't always been the closest out of our siblings, but… I never thought you'd hide this from me." He frowned as well, feeling guilty once more. "Why didn't you just tell us the truth right from the start?"
"Well… I was going to at first. Honestly, I was. I just… got caught up in the 'what if' of it all."
She blinked, his analogy not working for her. "I'm sorry, the 'what if' of it? What's that mean, Linc?"
"Oh, geez, how do I put this… well… do you remember the time the toilet clogged up?"
"Lincoln, you're gonna have to be more specific."
He gritted his teeth, the memories of what he was referring to starting to build up in his mind. "Okay… remember the time it got clogged because of… a book?"
"A book? What kind of-" And then it hit her, clear as day. "Oh! That book. Honestly, I still can't believe you read that stuff."
He had to take a deep intake of breath through his nose to prevent himself from speaking too loudly in response to this. "First of all, I don't read it anymore. Not after the couple of weeks you and the girls put me through after you found out."
"Oh, come on, it wasn't that bad."
He scoffed, retorting, "it was for me. But, that's why I didn't think I should tell you girls about me doing gymnastics, especially when I was just starting to discover it."
She shuffled on the couch, allowing her to turn her body towards him a bit more. "Now, hang on a second there, bro. You're comparing a sport to something as sickeningly sweet and pathetic as that glittery mess?"
"Well, yes and no. Yes, because you girls put me through hell for admitting to liking that… but that's not the only thing you girls have mocked me for liking."
"Well, what else is there?" She asked, her voice slightly softer yet still showing that she was curious about what was behind the walls they were breaking down, as he took another drink of his water.
"Well, let's start with my superhero outfit."
"Linc, you threw your underpants on the outside of it-"
"And that made it okay?" She jumped back slightly, both kids whipping their heads over their shoulders to see if his raised voice had caused their parents to stir, before sighing with relief when they realised it hadn't, then looking back at each other. "Lynn, I'm never going to pretend it's a picture perfect match of the actual costume, or even a licensed cosplay outfit, but I did make it myself, and I was pretty proud of it at first. I probably would still be if you and the others hadn't laughed as much."
She couldn't help but feel guilty at this. "Oh… now that I think about it, I guess we were a bit harsh… maybe more than a bit. Still, we don't laugh at your new one, do we?"
"No, you don't, though I still can't help but feel judged whenever I put it on, you know?"
"You really feel like that?" He nodded, making her guilt feel greater. "Geez… how come you never told us about it?"
"Honestly, at this point, I'm not sure… but, it wasn't just the cosplaying."
"Well, what else was there?" He opened his mouth to answer her, then hesitantly shut it again. "Linc… you can tell me. I know you probably don't see me in a great way right now, and I haven't really noticed this before, but… I'm listening now. So, yeah… I wanna hear it."
Seeing the look in her eyes, he sighed, grabbing his glass for another drink before he spoke again. "It just seems like, whenever I find something I like… there's at least one of you, more often than not more than one, who thinks it's stupid. My comic books, my video games, my coin collection, the shows I like… it just makes me think that that's always going to be the case. That's why I didn't tell any of you straight away that I do gymnastics. I was worried it was going to be the same."
"… you thought that about all of us? Even me?"
He looked into her eyes and saw the glimmer of hurt that was behind her gaze, her frown dropping lower than before. "Lynn… the reason I chose to tell you first, is because you're the hardest person it is for me to tell. You do all these sports, pull off amazing feats every game… you've trained me without even knowing what you were training me for… I was worried that you were going to be ashamed of me. It's not exactly football, or hockey, or basketball. Even you admitted that it wasn't really your thing. I was worried, more than anything, that you'd want nothing to do with me. That you'd be ashamed of me." He could feel his emotions building, though he forced himself to swallow them down, not realising that his sister was struggling to do the same thing. "This past week, your training has been some of the most fun I've ever had with you, and even before, I used to enjoy practicing with you some of the time, when it was us working together. I didn't want to lose that… I didn't want… to lose y-"
He didn't get the chance to finish that sentence, before Lynn practically fell towards him pulling her brother into a hug, his body feeling how she was shaking her head as she buried her face into the crook of his neck. He was surprised by the gesture, but it felt more than right, so he pulled her close to him and hugged her back.
"You were never going to lose me, Stinkoln," she told him, getting a weak laugh out of the boy. "I could never do what you did today, what you've been doing for the past month. Partly because I prefer sports where there's an actual score, sure, but mostly because I couldn't be that brave."
Those were the words Lincoln never expected to hear from the sporty Loud's mouth, making him release the hug so he could look her in the eye, their misty eyes meeting instantly. "What do you mean, brave? I couldn't be as brave as you if I wanted to!"
She shook her head, telling her brother, "doing football and basketball and roller derby and all them other sports, I might like to be the star player, and always be number one, but… gymnastics? I could never do that. You need grace to do that, finesse, style… god, I'm starting to sound like Lola." This got another genuine chuckle from her brother, making her smile slightly, though it faded when she added, "those are things I don't have."
"Of course, you have those things," he told her as she wiped her tears away, while he did the same. "How else are you able to pull off those last minute buzzer beaters, or those long distance field kicks, or those other amazing things?"
"Honestly, I just shoot and hope it goes in. I might make it sound a lot more complicated sometimes, but that's all it boils down to- you take your shot, you hope it works."
"Well, gymnastics has kind of turned out to be sort of the same thing- you go for the jump or the twist or whatever, you try to make the landing and hope it sticks. There's other stuff on top of that, but at it's centre, that's what you try to do."
She gave a small scoff. "Yeah, but I wouldn't exactly call kicking people's butts graceful."
He didn't even try to hold back his chuckles at that one, bringing a smile back to the brunette's face. Once he had stopped his laughter, he looked at his older sister and asked, "so… now that you know the truth, and you know why I felt like I couldn't tell you straight away… I guess all that's left for me to say is… I'm sorry. I shouldn't have kept it from you like I have done, and I don't expect you to forgive me for it, but I hope you can accept my apology. I thought- no. I KNEW you'd be the hardest person to tell, not because I didn't think you'd understand, but because I knew that I had the most to lose with you."
"The most to lose?"
He nodded, adding, "because even though I didn't tell you the truth, we've become so much closer because of it, and if you weren't okay with me doing this, then…. I don't think I could look at it the same."
Lynn could sense the sincerity in his voice, not a single sign making her suggest that he might be lying. She took a moment to collect herself, figuring out exactly what to say now that she knew the whole truth, and then she spoke. "Look, Linc… I'm not gonna lie. It's kind of sucky finding this out. I don't mind that you do gymnastics, because if it gets you exercising AND makes you happy, then you've found the right sport for you." She diverted her gaze in an attempt not to get choked up. "It did hurt when you first told me… kind of made me think that you didn't trust me… though, I guess you were right not to."
"Lynn… that wasn't what I-"
"All this time, I've made you feel like dirt over nothing. Sure, I don't get why you like all that nerd stuff, but I never meant any harm by all of that. I thought it was just a bit of a joke between you and me, bro and sis. I didn't want you to feel like that because of it."
"Lynn-"
"And now, I totally get why you wouldn't tell us! All this time, we've been jerks to you just because of the stuff you like. I'd be lying if I said I don't do it with the others, and they don't do it with me, but… that still doesn't make it okay. I'm sorry, bro."
His hands shaking slightly, he pulled her towards him by her shoulders, wrapping his arms around her and resting his chin on her shoulder. "No, Lynn. I'm sorry. I do trust you, and I'm sorry I made you feel like I didn't. I shouldn't have been so selfish."
She shook her head, pulling him closer as she reciprocated his embrace. "You're not selfish, bro. You were doing what you thought was necessary. I didn't get it at first, but I do now."
"Do you forgive me?"
"Of course I do, Lincoln. I just hope you can forgive me for all that other stuff."
"I don't see why I can't."
She gave a small chuckle, before letting go of the hug. "Thanks, bro. And, hey- for what it's worth, I really am proud of you."
He couldn't help but feel proud at hearing such high praise from 'number one herself'. "Thanks, Lynn."
"And yeah, you don't got to worry. I won't tell the others. I'll let you figure all of that out."
His smile grew a bit more as he nodded, replying with, "I will."
"Good. Now, come on, before mom and dad catch us." He nodded, and the two began to make their way upstairs, but just as Lincoln was about to head towards his room, he felt Lynn grab his arm. "Hey. You wanna crash in mine and Lucy's room tonight?"
"Uh… really?"
"Yeah, it'll be like when we were little." He opened his mouth, but was quickly cut off by her adding, "and no, I'm not gonna snore."
He smirked, quipping, "are you sure about that?" He felt a light punch on his shoulder, making them both chuckle, but he soon after told her, "I wasn't gonna ask about that. I was gonna say, sure."
"Great! Let's go."
So, the two entered the middle bedroom, the older sister crawling into bed first before her brother joined her. After making sure he was covered, he rested his head on the pillow and pulled himself towards Lynn, the sporty girl allowing Lincoln to hold onto her as they both drifted to sleep, knowing that the issues between them were resolved, and that he had taken the first step to telling his sisters the truth.
每周推薦票狀態
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