章節 8: Chapter 8 - Thane
I shuddered when the tingling started in my crotch as another full-throated groan came from behind the bathroom door. The woman was a goddess. A quirky, filterless goddess, but a beauteous deity, nonetheless.
I curled my toes into my soaking shoes to keep from going back in there. Clenched my fingers into fists to keep from pulling her into my arms. Bit my lips to keep from biting hers.
Her penchant for nudity notwithstanding, she had a body that could stop traffic. The image of her slapping the car's hood as she'd stepped out into traffic had a laugh bursting from my tight chest. She was unlike anything I've ever known.
One of the guys knocked on my door. By the hard, sharp raps of it, I was going to go with Tagan. That man was uptight enough to make coils jealous. "Come in," I called as I toed off my sopping shoes.
"She needs to go, Thane. She's screwing everything up," he said before he'd even gotten the door open all the way.
I snorted as I ditched my shorts and underwear. Peeling drenched compression fabric off my ass was a workout I hadn't been prepared for. I got it over the curve of my ass and sat on the chair just inside the closet door. "I'm not kicking her out, Tag. She's got nowhere to go." I remembered her expression as she looked at her reflection. "Fuck, she didn't even know what a mirror was."
I peered around the doorjamb and looked at our middle brother. The quiet one. The one who needed order and control. It's what had made him so good in the Marines. But his transition back to civilian life was playing havoc with his inner demons.
He clenched his fists.
Just once, I wanted him to lose it. To go wild with whatever emotion battered at him from the inside. To let it out instead of bottling it all up.
He breathed deeply in through his nose, his eyelids pinched closed. As he breathed out, his lips moved slightly as if he were counting to himself. When he opened his eyes again, all emotion had been locked away.
With one last thump, I got the cursed compression shorts off the end of my foot. They flopped against the far wall with a squishy, wet flap. I grabbed an extra towel and wrapped it around my hips.
"What do you think she's screwing up?" I asked as I came back around the corner.
His jaw muscles popped and snapped as he ground his teeth. "Our order. Our schedule. Our bodies. Did you not remember passing out? Or having to drag Tove across the floor? That was because of her." He stabbed his finger towards the shut bathroom door.
I snorted. "Our schedule hasn't even been mussed, let alone screwed up. As to the order of the place? Except for her bloody shirt out on the floor, you wouldn't even know that she was here if you hadn't met her."
He narrowed his eyes at me. "Forgetting something else?"
I shook my head, my lips tipping down into a confused frown. "Nope."
"Ainsley." He shot me a victorious smile, his gray eyes lighting up. "Think she'll have a problem with your new friend?"
The bottom dropped out of my belly. "Shit."
"Shit, indeed, brother. And Ainsley's not exactly the most stable of females."
I snorted. No, she fucking wasn't. "Well, it's not like I've slept with Hollyn. All I've done is brought her home to clean her up and help her out." If only I could get my conscience to agree.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I wanted Hollyn a million times more than I'd ever wanted Ainsley. And I barely knew the former.
I shuddered. But I knew all about the latter. Ainsley Christiansen was not a person you wanted to tangle with. The only daughter of one of the big six media conglomerates, she pretty much ruled with an iron fist. That her brothers and her father allowed that kind of shitty behavior was beyond me.
I didn't answer to her in a professional setting, so I was usually spared the sharper edge of her talented tongue. But when we show up at the same charity events, galas, and auctions, it was hard not to run into each other. After a few years, I'd brought her home for the night. We'd been together ever since.
"I need to break it off with her. I've been meaning to, but there was never a good time. Or good enough reason." I rubbed a hand over my forehead.
Tag laughed, the sound harsh and grating. "You think she's going to listen when you say you want to break up? You'll need to take out an ad while you also start recruiting former Navy SEALs to be your personal protection team."
I flipped him off. "Thanks for the support, asshole."
He blew me a kiss. "Hollyn is bad news, brother. I can feel it." He laid a hand on his abs for a moment.
I shook my head. "And everything inside me tells me she's what I've been waiting for. The spark to the fuse."
He snorted. "Yeah, of a bomb."
I ran my hands through my short black hair. "Aren't you tired, Tag? Tired of the same old thing? The same nothingness? Ever since mom and Cha"
He raised a hand, cutting off my words. "No. You don't get to use them. Not like this. Not now." His gray eyes hardened into unyielding steel.
I shook my head. "We've been existing. Barely surviving some days. And now you want to take our best shot at really livinghell, thrivingand show it the fucking door?"
He snarled at me, his top lip curling up. "We lost it when they died, Thane. You know only females can carry it."
"And I know she can do it. Hollyn can do it. I can feel it." I slapped a hand to my abs.
The water shut off behind the door. "Thane," Hollyn called, her voice raised.
"Yeah, Stretch?"
Tag glared daggers at me.
"Do you have a fabric or length of cloth for me to dry with?"
Tag's face I would have laughed at his expression, but I was too busy arguing with myself not to offer her mine. I mean, she'd invited me to get naked earlier. It wasn't like she would be unprepared for the male form.
"Sorry. I've never seen a man like you." Her words tripped through my mind. Just as powerful now as they had been the first time she said them. They grabbed me by the throat and stiffened my dick.
Not to mention the look in her eyes when she'd said it. I bit back the groan as I remembered the naked hunger in her lavender irises. She'd been looking at me like I'd probably been looking at her.
Tag punched my arm. "You going to answer her, or just tent your towel some more, you perv?"
I growled at him and went back to my closet. I heard the bathroom door open before I could grab a towel. Shit. Fuck. Damn.
"Oh. Grumpy, it's you," she said.
I snorted. Grumpy wasn't far off.
"Do you know where Thane is?"
"I'm here. I was getting you a towel." I moved around the doorjamb and forced myself to keep my eyes on her face. But damn did her wet naked body in my peripheral vision give me enough for a jerk session tonight. "Here you go."
I handed her the towel. She dabbed at her body, catching the drops as they skidded over the surface of her skin. Little goosebumps rose as the air kicked on. She shivered. "It's very chilly in here."
Was it? I just felt like my body was going up in flames. My dick was trying to get a peek at her, too.
With a glance at my body, Hollyn's brow wrinkled. "Is that the way to wear this? What did you call it? Towel." She nodded at my waist.
I nodded.
She shrugged. Wrapped the bath sheet around her waist and walked towards the door. "It's much different from back home, but then again, many things are. Thank you for letting me use your shower. It was heavenly."
Tag barred her progress. "No. You need to lift it up to under your armpits." He reached out to adjust her covering himself.
I felt the growl start in the back of my throat.
He stopped all movement, turned to look at me. "Now? You're going to go territorial now? Over her?"
"Don't touch her," I said, my voice little more than gravel. Even as I lurched forward to stop him, I wondered at my behavior. Hell, we've all shared the same woman before. I wasn't a douche, let alone a controlling one. Even though I definitely sound like one right now.
But something about his attitude towards her and now he wants to touch her? Nope. Not happening. Not on my watch.
I grabbed the towel from his hands and shoved him out the door. I reached out, swung the door shut.
Hollyn had backed up, her eyes wide. "I didn't mean to enrage him. I know that I can be annoying. And usually without trying. But he didn't approve of my nakedness in the other room, so I attempted to cover myself. But it appears I've messed that up as well." Her lavender eyes were soft as she looked up at me. Almost as if she expected me to berate her.
I lifted my hand, the towel dangling from my fingers.
She flinched back, her hands raised. "I'll leave. You don't have to hit me."
I dropped my hands. "I'm not going to hit you, Hollyn. I will never hit you. No one in this house will. Not even Tagan, even if he is a grumpy bear." I waited until she stood upright again. "I was just going to show you how women typically wear these. You're very considerate of Tag's feelings, even though he's an ass."
She lifted her arms up until she formed the sexiest T I've ever seen in my life.
I wrapped the towel around her body. Snugged the extra corner in between her breasts and stepped back as if my hands were on fire. It wasn't the fire in my hands I was worried about. "Let me get you some clean clothes to wear."
Her face fell. "I bet you wear clothes all the time, huh?"
I was leaning forward to taste the pout on her lips when another knock sounded on the door behind me. I jerked back, wanted to punch myself in the face. "What?" I called without looking over my shoulder.
"Tag said Ainsley's on the phone. You weren't answering," Toven called.
I winced. Shit. I was supposed to call her back when I got home. I'd been a little preoccupied.
"Thanks, Tove. I'll call her."
Hollyn's eyes were bright. "Do you have another replica?"
I laughed, the knot in my belly dissolving in an instant. "No. Ainsley is my girlfriend. I've been meaning to break up with her. Tonight has given me some new clarity on things."
Hollyn gave me a puzzled smile. "Is a girlfriend like a mate? You guys have sex?"
Heat rushed over my face. Hell, my entire body. I nodded. "Yeah. Do you not have those where you're from?"
She shook her head. "No. We have mates and bed partners. I'm not sure they are called girlfriends. I've never heard that term before."
"How about boyfriend? Ever heard that one?" I forced myself not to clench my teeth. Or curl my hands into fists.
She shook her head. "No. After" She cut herself off. Shook her head again. "No. No mate or bed partners. For the most part, I was too weird. Had my head in the clouds or my nose in a book. People tended to leave me alone." She rubbed her hands up and down her arms. Gave me a crooked smile. "If you have those clothes, I'll try to wear them."
I smiled at the choice of words. She was going to try to wear clothes. I nodded and turned back to my closet. If I were a girl who hated clothes, but had to wear them, what would I choose? I grabbed a set of new boxers. Why Ainsley kept buying them for me, I had no idea. I wore boxer briefs.
I also grabbed a wash-worn A-line tank top. Put it back down, grabbed a black one. I didn't need to tempt myself any more with being able to see Hollyn's body through a threadbare white wife-beater.
As I stepped back out into my bedroom, Hollyn was nowhere to be seen. I rushed to the door. If Tag's run her off, I'm going to beat his-A soft snore had me turning around so fast, I almost lost my towel.
Hollyn was sprawled on the floor. Her dark purple hair in a loose knot at the top of her head. Her towel sliding open as she breathed. Her arms and legs were spread in a giant X.
I smiled as I dropped the clothes at the foot of the bed. Yanking off the thin blanket that covered the foot of my bed, I snapped it open and let it drift down over her supine form.
Her brow wrinkled as the cloth settled on her, but with a soft snort, she curled onto her side and tightened her fists into its material.
"Sleep well, Stretch."
**
"No, Ainsley, you don't need to come over here. It's not going to change my decision. I should have done this months ago." I pinched the bridge of my nose. I wasn't sure how many other ways I could tell her I was done. If she didn't get the message soon though, I was afraid I was going to have to get rude.
"But this has come out of nowhere, Thane. If you were feeling this way for all these months, why are you just now bringing it up? What's changed between heading out for your run and getting home almost two hours late?" Her high-pitched voice was grating on my nerves.
From the questions, I knew she didn't really even care, other than the fact that I was the one doing the dumping instead of her. She would have been in tears if she'd had any more feelings than this. Hell, she cried when a child dropped his juice against her purse while we were out to dinner once.
"Ainsley. I'm done. I'm sorry it had to end this way. I'll even talk to you about it in the morning. My decision will still be the same. And don't call Tagan or Toven tonight either. Going behind my back will only make this worse. Good night." I hit the button to disconnect the call.
Apparently, it was the night to hang up on people who couldn't understand basic English. I hitched the towel tighter around my waist as I made my way back to my bedroom. I needed to get an actual shower and get some sleep before I had to be up in a handful of hours.
I pushed open the door and came to a complete stop. Hollyn was still on the floor, but she was huddled back against the wall. Her eyes were wide and blind with terror. She whimpered and tried to disappear into the wainscoting when the light fell on her.
"Hollyn." I used a calm voice, low and gentle. "Hollyn, it's me, Thane. Can you hear me?" I left the door open so I could see her. I didn't know what turning the overhead lights on would do, though.
Her head turned towards the door, but her eyes were still glassy. "Th-Thane?" She raised a hand. "I can't find you." Her voice was small and thin.
I gritted my teeth as I moved to her side.
When she flinched back, I sank to my knees and crawled to her slowly.
Her shoulders relaxed.
"Hollyn, I'm right here. It's Thane. Can you see me?" I said as I eased my way by her side. "It's Thane, honey. You're safe. No one's going to hurt you."
She whimpered again as silent tears slid down her face. "I can't find you. Where are you?" She turned her head as if trying to track me in a dream.
"I'm going to reach out and touch your hand, honey. It's Thane, okay? Just Thane." I laid my hand on hers.
She jerked under my touch but didn't pull away. Some part of my heart melted at her trust in me. "I'm right here, Stretch. Right here." I moved forward until I could place her hand on my chest, directly over my heart. "Feel that? That's Thane. Come back to me."
Her fingertips tested and flexed into the muscles of my chest as she blinked rapidly. "There you are." Two more tears escaped as she finally looked up at me with clear eyes. "Why did you leave me?"
I was gutted at the lost little girl in her voice, in her eyes. "I was just out in the living room, Stretch. I didn't leave. I'm still here."
She nodded, but her eyes spoke her feelings of betrayal. "Okay." She pulled her hand from my skin and wiped at her face. "Oh stars. I'm crying. I haven't cried since I was a child." She scrubbed at her cheeks until they were red and streaked.
"Why did you think I'd left you?" I had to know. Had to know what monsters hid in her mind. I wanted to banish them. Rip them from her so they couldn't bother her anymore. Couldn't torment her mind and soul.
"I woke up and didn't know where I was." She looked up at me, old horror in her gaze. "Then the door opened and all I could see was a man's outline." She swallowed. Shook her head. "I was just confused. That's all. It won't happen again. I promise." She moved her fingers in what looked like a familiar pattern. When she was done, she kissed the nail of her thumb.
I gripped the edge of the towel that wanted to slide down my hips. "Stretch, I don't mind. I just wanted to make sure not to do it again. You're not in trouble."
She nodded, not looking up. "Right. Of course." After a moment of awkward silence, she faked a yawn and said, "Well, look at the time. I should probably get some more sleep." She stretched out on the floor again, almost rolled herself under the bed. "Good night, Thane." With a quick pat of her hand on my foot, she closed her eyes and faked a snore.
A sad smile pulled at the corner of my mouth. Clearly, she didn't want me poking and prying into her past. And, in her awkward way, she was giving me an out. I was going to take it. This time. But we would be talking about this whole episode in the morning.
Monsters weren't nearly so bad in the light of day.
I knew that from personal experience.
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