章節 15: 14. Anguishing Pain - 4
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"YOUR PAIN IS MY PAIN."
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[For this chapter, play 'Butterfly (Prologue Mix) by BTS]
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▅ ▆ ▇ █ Let my pain fly, like a butterfly █ ▇ ▆ ▅
"Y/N, what happened to you in the past?"
That was the question you always feared someone might ask from you. You hated explaining your past to other people, since it made you feel even worse about everything. It made you hate your brother even more, because it reminded you of your brothers incident, but it made you love your brother, because you miss him too much, to the point you just want to kill yourself and follow his lead.
You know that Jin asked you about your past, because he was worried and curious. But you can't deal with your emotions right now, maybe ever. But you know that you have to open up to someone at some point in your life, so why not now? You trust them. Right?
"Y/N, I know I might sound rude when asking you that, but I'm seriously worried about your health. Your aura is just... sad, miserable." Jin stated. "Being near you makes even me sad. It's a good thing Jungkook can't sense it right now." He continued.
"I- I know that I should talk about it to someone... but I'm afraid it'll break me even more..." you mumbled.
"I understand that you might be a little sceptical about explaining it, but trust me, we are in this together, all of us." He smiled. "Even though we only just met, I know I can trust you completely, and I can see why Jungkook likes you a lot." He winked at me. Jungkook gave Jin a weird glare before joining the converstation the two of you were having around the kichen table.
"Do you want to start from the start or should we ask you questions about it?" Jungkook asked carefully, stroking the small of your back in small circles, calming you down so you wouldn't stress about the situation too much.
"No, it's okay, I can start from the beginning." You sighed and started explaining everything from the very start.
"It all started when I turned 8 years old."
-Flashback-
"Y/N come downstairs, we have something to say to you." your mother yelled from the kitchen that was located downstairs.
You ran to your mother and hugged her tightly before sitting on the couch with you mother. She definitely had something for you since her faice was beaming with a bright smile just for you. It only made you eight-ear-old self more excited than before. You were practically jumping on the sofa from excitement and your mother laughed next to you.
"So, sweetie, I have something for you." she smiled. "Let me get it for you." She said and signalled you to wait in the living room and to close your eyes. "No peeping through your fingers, okay?" She said.
"Yess," You said excitedly.
Your mother seemed to come back with something in her arms. The wrapping was scratching against her clothes as she walked down the stairs slowly. It only made you more excited and you couldn't wait to open your present.
"Okay, dear. You can open your eyes now!" She said and you did what she said.
It was a huge present. It looked like something soft was inside of it. Your mother handed you the big present and you started examining it as soon as you got it in your hands. Your mother chuckled at your cute actions as you held the present in your hands and examined it from different angles before ripping the wrapping of the present.
You were then ready to open the present and started ripping the paper. At first, it looked like something fluffy was coming out of the package, but soon you realized it was a big fluffy plushie. Your eyes beamed with excitement as you saw the plushie that unveiled from the wrappings. Your mother was watching proudly as you jumped around with your new unicorn plushie.
"I saw you looking at it when we were out shopping together, so I thought you would want it as a present!" She smiled warmly.
"I love it so much, mommy! I'll treasure it for the rest of my life!" You beamed a smile back at her.
"I'm glad you like it!" She chuckled. "And hey, I'm sorry to say this, but you have to stay at home with your brother for a little while, because I have a work trip with your father today."
"What?? So early?" You frowned. It was only 8 am right now because you couldn't sleep anymore. The excitement was keeping you from sleeping.
"It's an important trip, I'm sorry sweetie." Your moher smiled at you.
"It's okay, I can manage with him!" You said proudly.
"That's my girl!" She laughed.
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It was now time for your parents to leave for the work trip. You were sad, because your father couldn't spend the day with you since it was your birthday, but you understood that their work was important. You bit them farewell and instantly went to your brothers room to wake him up.
You opened the door to his bedroom and instantly jumped on his bed, waking him up in the process.
"Hey, what's wrong with you? Don't you have anything better to do than jump on my bed?" Your brother chuckled with his sleepy voice.
"I want to have breakfast with you, since mom and dad already left for work!" You said while jumpin gon his bed excitedly.
"Fine, let me change first," your brother mumbled and stood up from the bed.
You were patiently waiting for your brother downstairs. When you saw him walking down the stairs in a loose hoodie, you instantly let out a wide smile. He looked at you and smiled lazily.
"So, breakfast huh?" He mumbled and opened the fridge to take some eggs and bread.
"What are you going to cook?" You jumped next to him, examining his every move as he cracked the eggs on a pan.
"Eh, eggs and bread...?" He shrugged and continued.
"Ah, right," You mumbled and sat on the sofa in the living room.
After you had eaten, the phone rang and your brother went to answer it. Who would be calling so early in the morning? You heard his gasps and went to check on him. He looked pale and you had never seen him so terrified as he was right now. His hand was coverin ghis mouth and it looked like he had tears forming in his eyes. You only heard his cracky answers to the person in the phone and when he was done, he instantly collapsed on his knees on the floor.
"Brother? What's wrong? What happened??" You worried.
"I- It's mom and dad- they... they're- they're dead..." He sobbed in your embrace.
You couldn't believe your ears. Your mom, who was beaming with smiles this morning and your dad, your only hero, were dead? No. That's impossible. They would never die just like that, right? You were frozen at your brothers words. The fact that your parents were gone was awful, it hurt, too much.
"No... what are you talking about...?" You shoke your head furiously as your brother was just sobbing quietly next to you.
"Y/N, they were in a car crash... they're dead..." He cried.
"What? No..." you denied the fact that they were dead.
"Just believe me for gods sake!!" He yelled suddenly, making you freeze. "I- I'm sorry..." He apologized immediately, embracing you into a warm, loving hug.
END OF FLASHBACK
"That was when my parents died in a "car crash." You explained, feeling the tears in the corners of your eyes. "But, now I know it wasn't just a normal car crash. My brother didn't tell me...that it was a murder..." You looked at your hands. The video you received from that unknown person was definitely real. You felt it.
"That's... horrible..." Jin gasped.
"..." Jungkook stayed silent as he already knew this.
"But... where's your brother then...?" Jin asked.
"..." this time you stayed silent. You felt your heart sinking as he asked about your brother. "He's... dead..." You said quietly, feeling the tension getting worse in the room.
"Wha...!" Jin gasped again.
"He... he killed himself after I turned 16... just like that." You let out a small tear.
"..." everyone stayed quiet at the mention of his death.
"What was your brothers name?" Jin asked curiously, still being careful about his sudden questions.
"...His name was...Jung Hoseok..."
"WHAT!?"
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