章節 11: The Undead's Wavering Resolve
The world keeps spiraling around Anastasia as she continues to drown deeper into her inner disquietude.
Then came flooding a myriad of memories.
"Has she no shame?"
"What's up with her? Doesn't she know her level?"
"She's always tagging along."
"Is she a pet or something?"
"Like a puppy that keeps wagging its tail."
One-master dog.
For some reason, everyone at school used to label her as that. People would talk behind her back and mock her.
Name calling was all they dared to do, though. She never let anyone get away with their offenses. She always stood up for herself, and she'd make sure that they'd pay for them twofold.
It's not like she's all alone in this either.
"Hey, Anastasia, are those guys bullying you again?" said a blonde guy whose face she still couldn't clearly make out.
Anastasia has a strong feeling that he's someone close to her, though. He would stand by her side while she did her best to make him smile.
He had her back, and she got his. They spent their youth together like this - a bond that appeared ludicrous to many for one single cause that she still couldn't figure out despite her recollection.
"Why can't I remember any more than this? Who are you? And just who on earth am I?" Anastasia kept asking an imperceptible void as she remained drifting in forlorn solitude, still unconscious.
But then, once again, only one sentence would always answer her like a broken recorder.
"...I like you, Anastasia..."
Bittersweet - one word that can summarize everything she recalls about the two of them. Even though those forgotten scenes and moments just continue stirring her head into stupor, she understands well that this person has once been an irreplaceable company.
---
"...Hmmm..."
Moaning in her sleep, Anastasia struggles to roll her eyes open. She feels like she has been in dreamland for far too long.
As soon as she finally regains consciousness, her sapphires suddenly lock contact with crimsons. Zen appears before her out of nowhere, a relieved smile gracing his features.
"You're awake. How are you feeling?" he asked, voice so soft and tender that it makes her feel like she's something fragile.
"W-What happened?" she voiced out confusedly, sitting upright and darting her eyes around.
"You collapsed last night. I've been with you throughout the evening since I had to make sure that you're in a good condition."
"What? Then... have you been watching over me the whole time? You didn't sleep?"
"I did sleep. Barely a wink."
"Are you stupid? I'm already a zombie. What worse that could happen?"
Zen only chuckles, a knowing look splattered on his face, while she just pouts, wondering what's funny.
Those dark bags under his eyes tell Anastasia that he isn't lying. His hair's messier than usual, and he really appears exhausted.
Now, she may be a cold-blooded creature whose heart is no longer pumping blood, and she'd been suspicious of him since the day she laid eyes on him, but she's not that heartless and cruel. She feels guilty for giving him all this trouble.
"You don't have to do all of that, you know. I'm practically a corpse now. I also just... got dizzy after hearing your-"
Then, she paused.
Anastasia recalls that she snuck inside his room and snooped around. Obviously, Zen already knows that she went to the forbidden area.
But contrary to her expectation, he doesn't seem to be that bothered about it. If anything, he looks concerned and somewhat burdened.
"You heard me singing? Is that why you collapsed?" Zen questioned, making her jolt slightly.
"U-U-Uhhh... Y-Yeah. I'm sorry for entering your room without your permission," she apologized, visibly flustered.
"I understand that you're curious. I couldn't really stop you from taking a look for yourself. As long as you're fine now, though, then all's good."
Anastasia then gapes slightly, a little dumbfounded. She was expecting that he'd scold her at the very least, but it turns out that he's not even mad.
He's still wearing his signature kindness and affability. All of these are just baffling her more, though.
"He may have said that he's my lover, but even then, I still don't get why he'd take such extreme measures. I mean, not every human would wait for their dead loved one to rise from their coffin and treat them like royalty... This guy's really a mystery. The oddest one I can tell... And more than anything, he's making it difficult for me to suspect him any longer," Anastasia pondered silently, her resolve slowly beginning to crumble.
"Listen, Sia, I have to tell you something..." Zen trailed off, making her snap out of her train of thoughts.
"But first, may I ask how's it going with your memories so far?"
"O-Oh, umm... I've regained some of them, but most were obscure," she answered, surprised at the suddenness of his question.
"Are you aware of all the incidents that made you remember them? You see, I've been carrying this presumption for a while now - a faster method to make you recall them, that is. It seems like your five senses have a huge role to play in triggering them to resurface. For instance, there's last night. You just heard me playing the piano, and you collapsed out of nowhere. I had the impression that it's because some of your memories returned."
Anastasia is thrown into a deep pondering at this revelation. She then tries to piece them out one by one, recalling each incident that made her memories come back.
Firstly, there's the time when she met Zen after waking up. As soon as she saw him, she suddenly pictured a guy in black who's pursuing her.
Then, the lightning strike - the one that made her remember about her life as some sort of a guinea pig in a laboratory.
"Sight and touch... perhaps? Those are two of the senses. Then, last night's been triggered by my sense of hearing... That's all weird. Just what kind of convulated situation I got myself myself into?" she wondered quietly, unnerved and appalled.
"You don't have to be scared, Sia," Zen assured before gently placing his palm on top of her hand.
"It's a good sign that your memories are coming back, but we still shouldn't take the process too lightly. Worst case scenario, you might go back to your slumber for a decade this time. So please, report these incidents to me... I'm aware that you've been wary of me, but please, trust me. I want to help you."
Anastasia can't lift an eyebrow at his dead serious explanation. If she doesn't believe him on this one, she might risk her second chance to live.
What's more, Zen seems to be a person she shared a memory with after all. His song yesterday is certainly unlike any other, especially since she felt all those unbearable surges of electrifying emotions that swept her off and caused her to unfold a new page of her past.
"He's also taking care of me this entire time while I have nothing to give in return. Perhaps... he's not really a baddie after all. Maybe it won't hurt to trust him a little," Anastasia thought to herself, clenching her new decision.
"Okay, I will," she then replied after a brief pause, making him beam in delight.
"Thank you," he chirped blithely, veiling his fatigue but to no avail.
"A-Anyway, I think you need to rest. I'm okay now."
"How sweet of you... I'll rest then."
With that, Zen ecstatically bends forward and lies his head on the top of her blanket, making Anastasia jump a little in surprise. She didn't mean that he'd rest in her room, but it seems like that's just how he interpreted her words.
"Hey! I didn't tell you to sleep here!"
But Zen didn't budge.
He only pretends to be snoring as he buries his face deeper into the fabric near her knees, wasting her effort.
"Ugh... Seriously... What an idiot."
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