章節 176: 176. Captain Delicious Pants
The convergence was going to happen. It was a large scale event that occurs when all 9 realms of Yggdrasil are in alignment. This alignment causes the dimensional boundaries of the 9 realms to weaken. This event occurs every 5 thousand years.
It was supposed to be beautiful from the eyes of beings who could perceive it. For normal humans, it was nothing but an unexplainable phenomenon happening around them.
Odin had organized a feast in Asgard and had invited the whole team of Defenders of the Universe. Odin still didn't know that the Dark elves were coming. As even he wasn't born when Odin's father, Bor, last fought them. For Odin and the rest of the Asgard, Dark Elves and Malekith were dead.
Alexander was currently in a campaign rally of his. He had brought Olivia and Amy with him. People would feel connected if they saw Alexander also had a family.
"... Through the Stars," he ended his speech with his campaign tagline. It was widely being talked about in the news that his agenda was to lead humans in space. But he was also being criticized that he was ignoring the issues on earth. Issues like hunger, terrorism, racism, etc. Alexander was already going to deal with all those so he let them talk.
"Alex, why are you working so hard to just become the President?" Olivia asked.
"Well, I can't become the Emperor, that's for sure. Becoming the president is the first step, Oli. The target is to unite the world." He explained.
"Glanpa, look. I painted you." Amy showed him an extremely good oil painting.
"I'll hang this in Oval Office, sweety. It's so beautiful." He praised her. Making her giggle.
*Ring Ring*
He picked up the phone. It was a call from Universe Tower.
"Sir, there's a man in a red costume. He says his name is Captain Delicious Pants. He says he has an appointment with you." The receptionist said.
"Alright, I'll be right there. Tell him to come to my floor." He answered and hung up.
"Oli, I am going back to New York. Today's work is finished." He informed her and disapparated.
...
Alexander popped back into his home and saw Deadpool drinking from a bottle of Firewhiskey. He hadn't taken his mask off and everything was spilling on the floor.
"Ah, so this is how the rich live." He commented.
Alexander cleared his throat and spoke, "Ehm... Rich people also drink it without spilling."
Deadpool threw the bottle away and came to him running, "Ah, Venessa said thank you."
Deadpool took out a knife "She sent this to you as a gift. I know, I know, this isn't how you say thanks but it's the thought that counts. By the way, you said you can fix my face. Please do it before I go full Darth Vadar."
Deadpool was continuously speaking. Alexander waved his hand and a tape appeared on his face.
"I will heal you. But you need to understand something first. You may think you are unkillable but you are wrong. I can just burn your body and leave only one finger. Then put it in a tight metal case made of the strongest metal in the Universe. You will spend eternity not being able to grow.
"If this doesn't satisfy you then I can also throw you in a black hole. You won't die but you won't be able to come out of singularity either." He said.
Deadpool was silent for a second, then started laughing, "Hahaha... Come on. I know you won't do that."
Alexander smirked. He touched his shoulder and apparated near a black hole. "Look, that's a black hole. Shoving you into that will be as easy as throwing garbage."
"SH*T SH*T F*CK I CAN'T BREATHE..." Deadpool gasped for air.
Alexander popped back to his home. Deadpool took a long breath, "This...is...the...best... breathing I've...ever done. Ah, I love Earth so much. Ummaaaah" he started kissing the ground.
"Actually that's just concrete. But it's the thought that counts, so go on." Alexander shrugged.
He continued, "So, you just experience how your body would react in a vacuum. You'd surely not die but would fall unconscious due to a lack of oxygen. Someone would have to save you in order to wake you up."
"Why are you telling me all that, Colonel?" Deadpool asked.
Alexander ignored his naming, "I want you to understand your limits. Remember, kid. There are beings in the universe stronger than that black hole. I am one of them, going in and out or straight up destroying that black hole is nothing for me. But then there are beings stronger than me too. Now imagine where you stand."
"Ooooh... I just got goosebumps."
"I want you to work for me as Deadpool. You will be hired by an organization called the Faceless men. They will give you targets to kill. The targets will mostly be corrupt world leaders, pedos, or enemies of humanity. You will be handsomely paid too." Alexander ordered him.
"Where have I heard that name, Faceless?... Oh, sh*t... It's that crazy assassin organization. They work for you?" He asked excitedly. Alexander only nodded.
"Sweet, I always liked their name and wanted to join. But they were too religious for my taste. So, I kill some bad guys and you make me look good?" Deadpool confirmed.
"Yeah, that's the deal." Alexander agreed.
"Awesome, let's do it."
Alexander just waved his hand and Deadpool's suit came off. He then took out a vial and threw the potion on him. In a matter of minutes, his skin returned back to normal. Alexander then quickly rematerialized the suit on him.
Wade took his mask off and went to look in the mirror. "Holy sweet Jesus. I'm so sexy. Oh! Vanessa is gonna ravage me today."
Then he looked back at Alexander with stars in his eyes, "I am so happy right now that I wanna suck you dry. But Venessa is already waiting for that... Wait, that came out wrong. No, Venessa does not have a ding-dong..."
Alexander tapped him again and threw him out of his house. ~Sigh, a whole bottle of Firewhiskey wasted.~
Alexander didn't know what kind of crazy fan he had just made now. Deadpool was going to go to crazy lengths for his presidential campaign promotions now. Deadpool had also fallen in love with Earth after being in a vacuum. He was surely going to mess with people polluting his new lover.
...
Earth,
Jane Foster was not Thor's girlfriend. She was just a friend now. She had come to check out the strange phenomenon happening. She then found the Aether. Alexander had let that happen as he didn't know where the Aether was originally stored.
So after she took it and returned back to Earth, the police came in. This time no Thor was going to come so Alexander just teleported her away to Thor.
...
Asgard
Rina and Gali had arrived on Asgard and had found Medusa. Medusa had told her that a huge feast was going to be held to celebrate convergence.
The mention of a lot of food made them forget why they had come. They forgot to tell Medusa that grandpa was angry and went on to have eating contests with Thor.
"Argh... Come on, how can you eat so much? What kind of Sorcery are you using?" Thor defeatedly asked.
"Huhuhu... It's sheer talent. No sorcery involved... and..." Rina couldn't complete speaking as a girl suddenly fell on the table.
"Woah... I don't eat humans, guys..." Rina interjected.
Thor recognized her and quickly tried to touch her. But then a red energy wave threw everyone nearby away.
Rina also fell down. "What was that?"
Thor looked at Jane's arm and saw the strange red thing inside it, "I don't know, sister. Father might know something. Can you levitate her and bring her along?"
Rina complied and levitated unconscious Jane. "Let's go, Thor."
Gali ignored everything as she was busy eating at another table. Soon Jane was put on an operation table and brought to Odin.
"Father, something has happened to Jane. I saw strange things flowing through her veins." Thor informed him. Odin didn't hold any hatred with Jane this time as Thor was already quite close with Sif now.
Odin quickly went and checked her arm. He saw the Aether moving in there.
*Sigh* He looked worried.
Thor saw it and asked, "What is it, father?"
"There are relics that pre-date the universe itself. What lies within her appears to be one of them. The Dark Elves were after it for quite some time, then my father, Bor defeated them" Odin explained.
"Ah, the same story that mother used to tell us," Thor interjected and continued.
"The Aether was said to have been destroyed yet here it is. What if Dark Elves too..."
"The Dark Elves are dead," Odin resolutely said.
"But I don't know how to get Aether out of her. I might need to ask my friend. His knowledge of mystic is more than mine." Odin said and left.
Jane slowly woke up and saw Thor and Rina standing beside her.
Rina quickly ran to her and asked, "Hey, what did Aether taste like? Was it tasty?"
Jane confusedly alternatively looked at them and finally, Thor explained it all to her.
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