Both my parents and siblings had high expectations of me in my past life, but my lack of drive for self-improvement coupled with my compulsive liar tendencies caused them so much dissatisfaction that they one day gave up without so much as another word...
Even when I was bullied in my younger years, they weren't very 'comforting' to say the least. The only memories I have regarding them was their disappointed expressions when I became an unemployed NEET after failing my education.
The only time they finally visited me was when they arbitrarily decided my future without consent.
As for what happened when I tried to deny their opinions and stay at home?
The looks in my parents eyes seemed to ask why I'd want to waste away my life in such a way like staying at home. They started telling me about how much of a wastrel I was for only eating their money...
As for my two 'ideal' older siblings who at least weren't as sociopathic as I was? They just outright forced me into the military because of how my supernaturally high instincts when playing games seemed to make me quite fit for the role of a soldier... Yeah, they made that stupid excuse...
To this, a unbelievable reason like that was why they succeeded in enlisting me into the military.
...Instinct, huh?
Back then, I only knew that I had good intuition that helped me many times despite my low understanding of main subjects at school like Science, English or Mathematics.
Even now I feel conflicted about their actions... Was I to thank my parents for raising me with such love and care or curse my siblings for sending me to enlist at the military out of boredom?
Hah... Now that I think about it, we really were siblings since our compulsive liar tendencies were quite similar. We would hide our pain from each other most of the time since each one of us didn't want the pity of the rest. Like that time my older sister who was bullied at school but still came home with a smile on her face as if it didn't matter.
I'm sure it must have looked ridiculous from my parents point of view when they saw how a close-knitted family like us tried hide our pains from each other over the years, right?
Not really... In fact, the reason we all were never able to be honest to each other was due to how we WERE siblings. All of us had our own little self-esteems that we wanted to protect in front our loved ones despite how it all ultimately didn't matter in the end. The scars only became deeper as time went on...
We would always want to share our joys with each other but wouldn't want to dampen the mood with our pains. I guess that's why we finally split our separate ways as time progressed...
Now in my present life where everything has been reset, having a little sister was a blessing that I cherished greatly along with my new parents who loved me dearly despite their flaws.
They are quite chaotic. Even though they live a boring life as the Duke's head servants, there's always a content smile on their faces no matter what the occasion. I grew closer to my family with each passing day after this 'reset', living my life away as I strived to become stronger than I was before. Not hiding any of my joys along with my pains.
As an old man in the body of a child, I tried my best to change and improve myself, but changing isn't that easy... A narrow-minded guy like me always only sees the things in front of him...!
I expected that I would one day get in a fight with my new family due to the rigid personality I inherited from my past life. This wouldn't be that surprising considering the fact that my mental maturity was supposed to be higher than my own parents. A contrast in the morales ingrained into me and the ones of this world were bound to clash one day.
However, I didn't expect that the bonds I built with Merilin would fall to pieces in such a way just due to that fact that I unhesitatingly murdered an assassin to protect her. Was it my lack of trust?
What did she see...?
Had she saw how I fought or did she only witness to how I mercilessly killed without remorse?
I didn't know what Father and Mother would think regarding this new side of me which I had never shown in our usually peaceful environment... Would they reject me or would still treat me as their son?
They might become disgusted my lack of empathy towards the living despite having lived in a peaceful environment. They could despise my ruthlessness or the treacherous methods I used for the purpose of 'protecting' Merilin from harm, but everything is fine to me as long as they don't get killed...!
Relationships could be mended with time, but their life isn't something that could be given back to them once taken. Even those of this magical world couldn't bring the dead back from beyond the grave... I'm well aware that there was no second reset of my life once this one goes to hell!
This was my resolution when I mercilessly killed that assassin outside Merilin's door. I knew that such a decision might lead to disastrous results and also knew that my conviction could even cause my family to fall apart, yet the only choice I had was to eliminate that young assassin before anything else...
I fought, and I didn't hesitate to kill...
It was nothing more than a clean and polished execution on my part, but to my younger sister who had only saw the brightest colours of this chaotic world... What she saw after peeking to see what was happening outside her room door was a tragedy that didn't have to happen. It didn't 'need' to happen...!
"Brother...!" I could still remember her screams after seeing the head of the young maid girl blow apart like a watermelon shot by a sniper-rifle. Her face must have paled considerably at what she saw.
Hmmm, I guess I already knew why she would call me a 'Monster'. I had just been blocking it out...
I didn't want to remember how she sat petrified on the floor of our parent's room where she slept after her legs gave out. Her head buried into her legs as she hid the expression she made on her face...
I could only helplessly try to comfort Merilin outside her door after murdering that little girl with my own hands. A fear engraved in my own ominous image etched into her eyes after saw the traumatising scene her fragile mind was unable to ignore.
I allowed the guards of the household to take me in for questioning so that I could take my time to think what to say... like if I should or shouldn't I lie... What should say in this messed up situation?
It was to save her? There was no other way?
She was well aware that I didn't even try to find another way. I had already made up my decision.
Maybe if I used my Horn of the Moon God Skill Root that had merged into my physique, then I would be able to manipulate her mind by directly sending Moon Mana directly into her brain, but doing that would just be inhumanly wrong on so many levels!
What would be the difference between me and that enemy in the dark who tried to manipulate me? I am NOT going to treat her abusively...! Although it DOES sound tempting to 'reset' our relationship as if it didn't happen... I could feel someone whispering into my ear even though there was nobody there.
I mean, who would brainwash and manipulate their little sister? Damn it! After some deep thought, the first thing I decided before leaving that interrogation room was to be honest since I also owed her an apology on top of calming her down...
I must not allow myself to be tempted no matter how good the idea of solving my problems using magic sounds! A blood-related sibling should never stoop low enough to brainwash their family member!
I already understood after experiencing that awkwardness between me and my older siblings in my past life that a relationship based off lies is shallow. I need to be more upfront with Merilin right now. I shouldn't try to choose the easy way out...
If I truly did lie once again, the bond between me and my sister would break apart so fast that it would leave no hope of ever being mended...! Well, that's if I didn't know how I could manipulate brainwaves...
What would I do if we had a falling out? Even I didn't know what the pain would cause me to do...
Hah... This was supposed to be a heartwarming scene of us finally making up, so how did it turn out like this? Natural blue lightning gathered around Merilin's body as she used her wand to manipulate multiple Lightning Gatherer Spell Circles she somehow formed on the floor with little effort...
I circulated Sun Mana after using my Skill Root to inject myself with external energy, then I started manipulating it like internal energy. Although I no longer had a Mana Flame within my body that could be used to store Mana, I was still able manipulate the Sun Ether inside a separate space within my Skill Root in order to use techniques like before.
[Support Skill- Light Clad]
My body glowed with Light Aura as I moved my hand to defend against the bolt of lightning, but sadly my movements were in vain. This so-called 'Support Skill' may have boosted my magic resistance, but it didn't give me magic immunity...
I mean, even with the Support Skill I created from using the most basic sub-technique of Aura Manifestation, it's not like I could move at a speed faster than lightning to block her attack. I could only take her magic head-on and do my best to block!
I quickly recovered from the paralysis I felt from being hit by her bolts of natural blue lightning and rushed to disarm her. I may not have a Mana Flame anymore, but it seems my Skill Root has no problem in emitting the power of an Rank E Magical Talent.
Well... it's not that I could use my Sun Mana within my Skill Root to mimic other elements anymore... I wonder if I'll be able to use any of my Universal Arts? Am I still able to use Combat Body?
Now isn't the time to think about that!
I have to disarm her before she unleashes something I won't be able to defend against in her current hysterical state of mind. There's no telling what a little girl lashing out in fear could do with all these Lightning Gatherer Spell Circles placed around her.
The best thing to do now is to push forward...!
"Stay away! Stay away!" She screamed in fear and waved her wand in her hand once again.
A plethora of Lightning Gatherers she seemed to have inscribed on the floor beforehand lit up as an even stronger electromagnetic force generated into thick streaks of electrical charge under me.
If it was the me from before I created my Halo of the Sun Skill Root, then I'd be having a hard time, but everything's different now that I've become a Skill Holder who could defy my previous Magical Talent.
[Support Skill- Earth Clad]
I used my will to retrieve the Earth Affinity Elemental Marble I had previously hidden underground and merged it into my body. This was kind of makeshift 'Support Skill' I now found I could use through fusing my Elemental Marbles with my physique and preforming Aura Manifestation.
I used the Earth Aura coating created by my Elemental Marble to harden my defences and speedily lunged my entire body forward using all my strength to take that Magic Wand away from her.
Tears were dripping down Merilin's cheeks as she was having a really big tantrum. Her emotions were chaotic and filled with fear but her movements were decently skilled despite her current chaotic state of mind. She waved her wand once more to activate countless Spell Circles as I was being physically pushed back despite defending her Spells.
[Support Skill- Lightning Clad!]
[Support Skill- Wind Clad!]
The Lightning Marble and Wind Marble beneath my feet also fused into my body to increase the amount of layers of my reinforcement. I wasn't able to properly control the four Aura Clads on my body but I WAS able to use all of their combined strength to boost the speed of my charge towards her.
It was then it occurred to me: Couldn't I use parts of my Combat Body Universal Art now that I was coated in Elemental Aura? Shouldn't there be no problem if reroute three of my Auras into mimicking my Secret Arts if I can use Aura Manifestation?
There was no time to think of the answer as I immediately changed my approach so that she didn't waste away all of her Mana trying to attack me... I needed to stop her from activating anymore Spell Circles since she'll might even die if she completely exhausts all the Mana within her body!
[Skill Overlay- Skin Reinforcement!]
[Skill Overlay- Weightless Breath!]
[Skill Overlay- Cognitive Drive!]
The world around me slowed down as charged forwards with indescribable momentum. She might have been able to stop me from getting close by using Blue Lightning Water Spells at close range if she was still calm to adapt her magic, but right now she wasn't thinking straight as she used the same method of attack over and over again in fear.
My body's enhancements were now WAY more powerful now that I was practically using the power of an Rank E Magical Talent to conjure my personalised Combat Body Universal Art.
This time I wasn't blown back by a mere graze of her magic and managed to dodge the trajectory of the blue lightning bolt she threw before grabbing the Magic Wand in her hand along with her wrist.
"It hurts...!" She cried as my other hand grabbed her head and caused her a little pain. Her eyes were still covered in tears as she wanted to attack once again to push me back... but halted upon seeing my sharp glare that wouldn't take anymore nonsense.
"Calm the hell down and listen to what I have to say for a moment." I said to her in a deep voice.
My face probably looked scary due to the veins protruding from my skin... I was angered to no end after getting attacked by my own little sister. Even though the lightning bolts she shot didn't manage to kill me, they still hurt like hell after hitting my skin!