章節 29: Ch 29 Choice
I felt sorry for Lone Wolf. He couldn't do anything but stand there, and he could barely do that. Old terror wouldn't let him go. His body twitched. My hand on his elbow was the only thing keeping him upright. He started to piddle and stopped himself.
"Tree," I sighed, letting him go.
When Lone Wolf was done, he came back before me. He had considered his options and came to some conclusion while he passed water.
He knelt before me again, placing himself in front of his companion, keeping himself out of my reach. His eyes begged for my forgiveness. When he found his voice I couldn't decide if he was talking to me or Spirit Wolf or both. Maybe he couldn't tell the difference.
"My lord." His voice choked on a held-back sob. "My Alpha," he half-whispered, "if you will have me. I offer myself to you in his stead. Command what you will of me. Please lord, do not hurt him. He..."
I was already moving forward, placing my hands first on Lone Wolf's head, then on his shoulders. He fell silent, unable to finish his plea. As much as he had planned to only play up the royal story, I knew his words were real. Silent tears ran down his face, falling on my toes. Once more I tilted his head up.
"Foolish wolf," I said gently, "you've been mine since you first heard my name. You know there is only one command I could ever give you. Are you ready to obey?"
When Lone Wolf started to look at his companion, I gently grabbed his chin; easy to do with him kneeling before me.
"Uh-uh. Don't you look to him for anything. Not anymore." I made him stand once more. "This has to be your choice, one you make freely."
I let go, my smile still soft but I knew there was a teasing glimmer in my eyes. I was hoping Lone Wolf would be able accept the freedom of the wolf, even as I knew he would go back to that hell-hole.
"Will you obey my command to learn of the wolf within you?" I asked. "I will never give you any other command. It is the only command I will ever, could ever, give, and it is a command you can refuse. The wolf should never be forced upon anyone."
Lone Wolf gave me a slow nod as if he understood. I wasn't interfering with his situation, just his personal life as man and wolf. There was a difference. The tension, at least a big part of it, seemed to just slide from him.
"I'd like to know more about what I am, really know it," he said longingly. He was more desperate than the shy one to understand the wolf within him. It had been denied him for too long. "What about..." and he glanced at his companion.
"What indeed?" I said thoughtfully.
"I think Spirit Wolf was going to do something to him. I intervened because of you," I told Lone Wolf. "What your companion did was based on what he had been taught by another."
"Is there a name we can call you?" I asked, turning to the still kneeling young man. "Go ahead and stand up," I added.
He stood but didn't answer. He kept his head bowed down.
"He is Beta," Lone Wolf said.
Mine wasn't the only snort. No way any of us wolves were calling this tweeb Beta.
"No," I said thoughtfully, grinning slightly. "I think until he earns his true name I'll call him Sheep."
There was a round of amused snorts, and a quiet glimmer of a growl from my dad warning me not to push things too far.
At Sheep's angry look I glared at him.
"You're Sheep," I told him harshly, "until the day comes you stop blindly following another. On that day you can tell me your true wolf name, but I'll never call you something stupid like Beta. It's a rank, isn't it? Not a name? Every man deserves a name, just as every man deserves dignity... Which brings us to your judgement."
I paused for dramatic effect, and was gratified to watch him squirm.
"There is a task set for you, the first step of an overdue journey. You get to go back to your alpha. You tell him all that happened here."
He would take the story back to the alpha, who would freak out knowing there were so many different "royal" wolves. The alpha had taught his pack to obey royalty without question. That warped leader used it to force his pack to obey him without question. The reality of other royals would threaten his hold on them. He would want to prove his right to stand with the Royal wolves as a leader. He would come out of his city, in time.
"You tell him things need to change. Sad part is I don't even have to tell you what needs changed. You already know. You tell him, no man is to made wolf without it being that man's choice. He bites anyone again and he will suffer Spirit Wolf's wrath."
The young man cringed, his increase in nervousness obvious to us all. He kept squirming, uncomfortable with the attention and my pronouncements.
"I'll tell you the truth. Me, personally, I want to charge in there right now, tear the shit out of him. But Lone Wolf begged for you to be given a chance. I'm giving it to you. Go take care of what is yours. Accept the responsibility you've been hiding from.
"You will have him at your side," I told the young man I had dubbed Sheep, glancing at Lone Wolf. "As much as I want to command that he stay as far away from you as possible, I know his heart. He goes to protect others and I won't, can't, stop him. He is more wolf than that man you call alpha. Which reminds me..."
I relaxed, becoming less commanding, more casual.
"The first time I met Lone Wolf, I could barely get any words out of him. He had too much fear. He didn't tell me anything about your pack other than how many are there. I don't know exactly where it is, but I assure you Spirit Wolf does. So, you make sure your alpha doesn't lash out at Lone Wolf in anger. He's under my protection and I won't have him harmed.
"Look at me!" I commanded sharply as Sheep's nervous gaze started to dart about. His breathing was close to hyperventilating. The smell of fear on him was stronger now than that coming from Lone Wolf.
"Do you understand what I mean, everything I mean, when I say he is not to be harmed? None of the wolves there are to be harmed. You understand me? It has to stop."
He nodded slowly, understanding, I hoped, that I meant the abuse, both physical and sexual.
"Good, because no wolf should live in fear. All deserve dignity. You see to it. And names. He is Lone Wolf. Say it."
The young man I had dubbed Sheep swallowed hard, the words coming out barely above a whisper, "His name is Lone Wolf."
Sheep's underlying fear was growing as his head bowed in submission to me. I hated commanding him, but I was playing by his rules. He needed this to be able to stand up to his alpha, the command of someone with undeniable authority over him. When he spoke to his alpha, he would be using my authority and not his own. That alpha was already afraid of me, of Spirit Wolf.
"Good," I said nodding. I took a cleansing breath, suddenly wishing for some peaceful time with my pipe.
I turned back to Lone Wolf. My eyes swept over the gathered wolves, stopping on the shy one. Somehow he was tied to all this, I just didn't know how. I needed to connect with him on a more personal level somehow. Suddenly I had a great idea. There was one way to join together and connect as wolves.
"Now that we have that settled," I said, expelling a breath and taking in another deep one before continuing, "anyone interested in a hunt?"
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