章節 152: 5.3
Unfortunately for Bebe, the time for maintenance isn't here and therefore neither is its vacation away from it's perverted sick fuck of a host.
Jia Hyson: (ノಥロಥ)ノ Bebe love me again.
While Bebe didn't know how long it will take, Bebe did know that at least it will get a notification at least a world beforehand to have time to prepare and inform its host of the changes. Still, the system wasn't optimistic it was any time soon. How many systems are out there? Even if the summoned group was a few thousand each time, the chances of being picked early were still quite low.
Once side mission rewards and skills were distributed now it was time for the main reward.
Bebe excitedly told Jia Hyson, "Hey, hey, we did really good this time ah. Just for the rating alone, Bebe can tell the p we earned was definitely not low."
Jia Hyson was also excited but he coughed and tilted his chin up with arrogant confidence, "Well," he nods as he gestures to Bebe to continue, his whole body exuding a 'I already know I won, it's only a matter of how much.'
Bebe: '…' Its previous excitement has been extinguished.
Thanks to Jia Hyson and Bebe's efforts, The Amazing Transmigrated Journey of the Mesmerisingly Divine Good for Nothing Village Girl has changed its name to Three Transmigrators, Three Men, and a Rooster.
Jia Hyson: Well, the naming has undeniably improved ah.
From originally a story with 2.3 stars, Three Transmigrators, Three Men, and a Rooster, has jumped to a very proud 4.5 stars.
Here were the reviews:
[Wow… you can tell when the author is talented when they make you reconsider dating the usual Asian guys and go straight for the big black cock instead LMAO (Update: No I'm not being racist! Read the story for the love of something that isn't god-because I don't think god would really approve it ahahahahahah)
I can't believe I'm emotionally invested in the love story between dragon and rooster.
Really like the main character! It's a nice angle where you actually made the cliche overpowered female transmigrator actually have some understandable that isn't just 'low EQ'. Plus the male lead was not the usual domineering powerful type that could match the protagonist in power but was merely somewhat powerful, and the strength of the relationship lies within mutual respect and shared interests which is very sweet.
I came here with expectations but was bitterly disappointed at the stupid plot. Brainless, doesn't make sense. The dragon and rooster thing was creepy and gross.
Love it!!!!! LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT DA GONG BEST BOI!!!
Amazing! The writing style is mature, the jokes are pretty consistently funny, the tropes are subverted well but not too outrageous (okay it's pretty outrageous but it's really good outrageous!)
To be honest I came here expect the usual plot, but I was really pleasantly surprised! I especially like the transmigrator who became a dragon Jin Bao, he's so funny ahahahah!
Am I the only one dying at how author has written the most cliche 'crippled unfavored prince villain slash male lead character who will show his prowess and abilities later on in the story and win the hearts of everyone' and has used him as a punching bag ahahahahahah. I didn't realise I needed so many male characters dissed until now. Great job author! This sand sculpture* type of story… I like it so much!
*sand sculpture (沙雕 , I think this is the right characters) - describe something weird/stupid but funny. Playful insult, there's another version more serious and offensive I think but both are internet slang.
Ummm… am I the only one who recognises the brief name drop of the dragon transmigrator being called Jia Hyson before they brushed it off and called him Jin Bao from then onwards???
Upstairs! You're not alone!! Could this be a black fan of my male god? I want to be angry but - pfffffttt, who told the author to make it so funny? Besides it is really a bit like my male god ah.
Upstairs, you don't read the author's note ah, this person is the male god's stepsister! My male god has also approved! Hahahahhahaha!!! The male god is so understanding to name drop himself in such a unique manner, as expected of my male god!!!
The plot was good, wasn't happy that there were so many gay side couples. You might as well have just cut the main character out and made it completely gay so I didn't have the misfortune to see all that unnecessary stuff. Or better yet just don't add so much homosexuality. It's ancient china for god's sake, keep it realistic somewhat. But yeah once you push past that, the story in itself is very unique.
I've never been more attracted to my KFC bucket in my life. (Update after reading chapter 217: I've never cried more into my KFC bucket in my life)
Ahhhhh I love that they put in gay relationships in this female lead story!!! And everyone was so supportive and the author did it in a humorous way too so it's also not like in your face either too, I highly recommend it guys!
Many twists while still retaining the typical transmigration plots but it's undeniably a breath of fresh air. Especially the interaction with Tang Muxin and Jin Bao, and then later on even Pan Shuchun.
Usually, other transmigrators are depicted like mortal enemies, cannon fodder etc, so seeing them all be friends and work together was actually really cool! I love they all had their own specialities too like there was some overlap but that helped their friendship further!
The guys were also cute! They were cliche too but because of the transmigrators, you see them a bit helpless and silly which gave them a new flavour heheh I like the cinnamon roll Ye Cheng the most!
And we can't forget Da Gong! OMG the most domineering tyrannical and doting character you will ever meet- as well as the biggest cock hehe. I won't spoil but he's hands down the best!!!
Okay, but someone explain to me why my standards from a boyfriend now feel inadequate in the face of a rooster?
Upstairs, I will explain but you must explain to me why my invisible third leg is standing up for a rooster first.
Ya'll are crazy simping for a rooster… when you could be wishing to be Pan Shuchun's lily garden instead!! Ahhhh mommy! Let me hold your thighs!
Wtf did I just read? …never mind I will read it five more times just to figure it out hehe.]
Overall the reviews were ultimately very positive. Jia Hyson felt a great deal of relish reading the reviews, after all even if he didn't personally write the story he was still the one manipulating in the shadows.
What was even more satisfying was that, he can also fully enjoy reading the story afterwards, completely unlike if he actually had written it. There are people who don't write that think that writers practically get to write exactly what they want to read and get revel in the awesomeness of having a book catered to their tastes.
To be honest, when Jia Hyson started writing he also thought along the lines. He had been unhappy that he couldn't find a story he wanted to read so he resolutely decided he might as well try writing one! But the thing is, dreams are beautiful and reality is cruel- the enjoyment of reading your own work is really not as good as reading someone else's.
It's a similar to the well known assignment of breaking down and interpreting a movie at school. Even if the movie was one of your favourite movies ever, the entertainment of it is inevitably ruined by the fact you are forced to analyse it, determine any symbolic dialogue, find the meaning in the costumes and lighting, listen hard to note down any changes in the musical that emphasises the current atmosphere….
Does the character's name have a special meaning? Is there a reason why the sun is setting in this scene? Is this purely to create a visually stunning scene or is there a deeper meaning behind putting the white roses at the foreground of the shot?
After six weeks of re-watching the movie, writing pages of observations and interpretations, and then finally answering like three essays worth of questions about it… Well, you can still like the movie and rewatch it occasionally but heh, the initial spark has definitely dulled.
It is similar to writing. As the person who has written the story, the process is fun, interesting, stressful, tiring, and a range of emotions that also depend on your current headspace. The writer pulls out ideas from their imagination, forces them into a somewhat logical order, fleshes it out and stamps it into each word they manage to type into reality.
It's a very gratuitous feeling.
But it also makes it very hard to reread your own story without 1. already knowing what will happen next, 2. noticing all the mistakes your brain didn't have the courtesy to notify you about after posting despite you checking thrice, and 3. having the urge to want to write it better.
Jia Hyson is a 'freestyle' writer who has a few ideas, writes them down and just goes with the flow, writing as he goes along and tweaking as he goes along, sometimes even spontaneously changing the entire direction, adding a new scene on a whim, choosing to suddenly change the character profile of someone who was supposed to enter the very next chapter and so on. Because of his easy style, he is probably less effected by this feeling then the more pedantic authors, and can often enjoy his older works with minimal cringe and self-hatred.
…Mainly because by then he had forgotten most of what he had written and there's a nostalgia factor involved.
Still even he tends to just skim the story, only stopping at the 'best bits' or favourite lines. It is not the same experience as reading something someone else has written, devouring each world, slowly forming characters in your mind, and wondering what will happen next or already forming theories. While he liked writing his stories, Jia Hyson could confidently say compared to reading his own work, he was much happier reading other's, but at the same time what made him happier than that was reading about other people enjoying his stories through comments and reviews and even discussions on forums.
In short, right now he was experiencing the joy of simultaneously reading many good reviews and will also still be able to experience the happiness of reading a good book. Jia Hyson was extremely satisfied. "Bebe, save the book to my library, let's read it together afterwards."
"Got it~" Bebe obeys, after all it was a bit of a habit to occasionally read the stories they changed together and laugh at the stupid things they recall from it. Bebe could purposely lower his processing time so he could deliberately match more or less with Jia Hyson's reading speed and it was fairly enjoyable to do occasionally. "Now generally skill points are rewarded with the extra bonuses, but obviously that's irrelevant currently. Since the Beta system is a small niche specialisation we're just getting a lump sum estimate based on the usual points. We scored very well in diversity, character development, world building, emotional depth and you actually didn't do anything worthy of getting an OOC punishment, giving us a bonus of about 6000p."
While Jia Hyson was happy to hear he finally didn't go OOC, he also felt the bonus reward was a little strange. He recalls in the second world, if he hadn't shown such a big character loophole as a result of a major OOC, he could have gained over a 100 skill points. Therefore he wasn't sure if 6000 p was a fair conversion.
Then again, Jia Hyson was a little concerned but he not so much that he would protest. After all, it seems like the systems were undergoing a big change in determining currency for hosts plus the subsequent changes to the system shop economy with everyone suddenly getting more p than before, so it was understandable there was a lot of trouble in this situation.
Ah, if this was a story, this sort of clumsy transition would probably be a rather pathetic attempt to fix up a poorly thought up system mechanic introduced in the beginning of the story. Tsk, Jia Hyson can only disdain such a stupid author.
"Anyway, with such a good turn out, it is almost as good as the second world. Therefore you have been rewarded with 13,000p. The compensation for the inconvenience of shutting down skill points has also been converted and you gain 6000 extra p on top of this!"
Jia Hyson swallows heavily. While he couldn't actually be called a rich man among system hosts but he was sure that the rate his wallet was fattening up was surely worth a lot of envy and hatred.
This world earned him 19,000p, and in his wallet he had earned 166,320p. This was mainly due to the kind and generous compensation he had earned early on complaining about the harsh conditions of the so called reward world he had been brought into… Jia Hyson sincerely hopes more mistakes like this happen hehe. _(:3」∠)_
Now with the added 19,000p he had 185,320p, which was quite an amount. Jia Hyson definitely didn't have to worry much about basic expenses and luxuries for a while unless he splurges on very expensive items. Fortunately, everything in the system is all good quality, and while Jia Hyson likes luxury he doesn't not have any strong urges to endlessly pursue the best things like some celebrities and rich people out there.
Seeing his chubby wallet of p, Jia Hyson decides he might as well take a break from working and enjoy the convenience of the system world. The last world was very comfortable in the latter half it was true, but it was still a setting based in ancient china. The perks of the modern world were still overwhelmingly superior. Even if he had unlimited universal wifi, it was Bebe who was mainly taking advantage of it as Da Gong had been plastered against him the entire time.
While he could have imprinted the things he was reading and watching with the wifi into his mind, Jia Hyson hadn't been comfortable with the feeling of closing his eyes and seeing whatever video or story he had previously looked at during the nighttime. In the end he still prefers using his phone, still accustomed to having a weight in his hand and scrolling happily away like the phone addicted man he was.
Sometimes, even a hundred years in the world, he would still instinctively try to reach for a non-existent phone in a pocket that wasn't even there. He always pretended it was an itch when he realised but eventually Da Gong had thought that there was an actual problem and insisted on getting Tang Muxin to make a cooling medicinal paste for his skin. It was a bit embarrassing ah.
Thinking about Da Gong, he instinctively looks around the room with a faint sense of expectation. "By the way, I don't think I saw Da Gong's shard…"
Pacing around the room, Jia Hyson glances around, his eyes were fairly sharp and it's not like the shards which glowed, were hard to miss. However, after a few minutes, he came up empty. Even when asking Bebe to scan the room, there were no traces except for the usual number in the drawer.
Seeing there was no Da Gong shard awaiting him, Jia Hyson felt a bit helpless and lost. Knowing the bird, he would not leave him hanging like this, and so Jia Hyson tried very hard to recall Da Gong's last words. Even if the memory was vivid, it had been a very long time, and it was impossible for him to recall word for word.
Fortunately, it was completely possible for Bebe.
"Tsk. Little worm, it's a pity and a blessing to not be able to follow you to wherever you go after this… I want to see you again soon." Da Gong voice echoes in the safe space, quiet yet penetrating.
Hearing the final words again Jia Hyson's heart trembled violently for a moment but eventually it calmed down. Even if the rims of his eyes were reddened he was still quite serene after taking a few breaths.
To be honest it wasn't that Jia Hyson was cruel or cold hearted. Well, he was a little, but that wasn't the point.
After Da Gong died he stayed in the world for another fifty years or so. He had a period of depression but in a way, after the first time Da Gong had left, the second time was much easier to accept, especially after living so many years happily together.
While Jia Hyson was occasionally wistful and morose, after so long, of course the taste of love had faded somewhat. Time can heal most wounds and blur most memories.
Jia Hyson's love for Da Gong in his opinion was true but he realised he was not the type of person who will be carved and reformed irreparably by love either. And that's okay.
Some people think true love is meeting someone you can't live without. There are people out there who will commit suicide after their true love dies, or will never fall in love again. Jia Hyson commends them, really, but he doesn't understand it either, nor does he appreciate the romantics pushing their views onto him and making him feel guilty.
Fifty years was enough to mourn and move on. That was a whole lifetime for some people. But even if he got over it in five years, while maybe it's not very beautiful, it's not wrong either. Most people only have one life, should they be sad their entire life just because of love?
Jia Hyson feels extremely lucky. He has one life but it is infinitely longer than a normal person's thanks to being picked as a host for the Beta system. Therefore he should experience as much as possible and use this opportunity to enjoy himself, not torture himself.
"Repeat the recording." He orders and subconsciously held his breath.
Bebe obediently does so, after all for it, the order was simple but despite his host's bluster, it knew it was much less easy. After all, logic was cold but emotions were warm- when things get too hot some things will inevitably change shape if only a tiny bit.
Listening to it again, Jia Hyson was more focused on the words said than the way his heart throbbed. To be honest, the words were pretty straightforward once you consider the assumption Da Gong roughly knew his identity and Jia Hyson's identity.
While he didn't have all the information, a picture was forming together slowly.
In the first world Monroe suddenly left after meeting Drake. Drake didn't show any big changes though. Both left shards, Monroe first, strangely being able to send the yin shard through mail, Drake sent his yang shard personally to his hand when dying.
The second world, well there was all sorts of hints. The old veteran cultist with silver eyes encountered the younger Li Guiren and attacked him before dying inexplicably before Jia Hyson dealt the fatal blow. Later Li Guiren's child Tian Shun had silver eyes and Li Guiren's initial expectation of the child chilled. Both left yin and yang shards, both during the moment of death.
The third world Sefu showed little to no signs and seemed fairly unaware. Only at the end of his life did he also pass a yin-yang shard.
Now the fourth world, Da Gong and Chef Wen acted way too obviously when they met each other. Some sort of ritual was done where Chef Wen killed Da Gong so he could be reborn through the people who ate his flesh. It is unknown what happened to Chef Wen but he had gotten noticeably older afterwards before disappearing. Now there is no shards.
With these observations, Jia Hyson could infer a few things that he quickly wrote in his rarely used notebook.
1. The yin and yang shards can recognise each other. Most probably it is stimulated by physical touch.
2. There may be some sort of age restriction as neither the child Li Guiren and the child Tian Shun reacted oddly but did so when they were older. (This needs further observation.)
3. The yin-yang shard is not self aware. (No appropriate trigger with another shard? Something to do with the fact it has both yin and yang components at the start already? Only seen this in Sefu, need more observation)
4. Once 'awakened' they have certain abilities that seem pretty complicated.
5. Meeting shards and gaining their affection does not guarantee taking their shard. (Due to ritual/special skill consequence? Maybe it is because Chef Wen who is not affectionate didn't give up his shard and needs both to be brought over to the safe space for balance? Mix of both? Alternate unknown reason? Needs more observation.)
Jotting down the key points and thoughts on them Jia Hyson was satisfied. And then he added a little cute doodle of a fat chubby rooster for aesthetic reasons. With a little smirk he boops the rooster doodle on the beak affectionately before frowning and hastily closing the notebook, throwing it to the side lazily.
Anyway, now that he had given himself some breathing time Jia Hyson lies down on his bed and snatches the docile Fishball who was snuffling around the pillows and hugging it with one hand on his chest while he opens up another blue holographic screen. "Hmmm, can you change the page to customise Fishball?"
Immediately the screen which had his default stat menu changed to show a picture of the soft fluffy grey rabbit Fishball as well as various arrows to swipe to see customisation options as well as a colour palette underneath.
"Host, Bebe reminds you, you can't actually turn Fishball into a bird." Bebe kindly reminds him. It's true you can do a lot of things in customisation but for the sake of capitalism you couldn't just arbitrarily change the species of the little pets you bought, instead, you must buy another pet of your newly preferred species instead.
"Hah," Jia Hyson scoffs, "We'll see about that."
Bebe: '…' RIP Fishball.
Fishball: U ÒᆺÒU ??
First Jia Hyson changed Fishball's colour to white and then bought a special skin for 50p where the fur on the little bunny's body became soft and fluffy feathers. Finally, he simply bought a rooster outfit for Fishball with a complimentary little paper beak one can stick onto the face with a little elastic rope. The outfit was even cheaper, only 25p. It barely made a dent in his savings, from 185,320p to 185,245 p.
And now Fishball looked like a fat fluffy white rooster… with bunny ears but that honestly just made it even cuter.
Jia Hyson cackles and squishes the obedient chubby Fishball like the cutest stress ball ever before rubbing its tummy onto his cheek violently and lovingly. "Ah, ah, ah! Fishball you're really the best!"
Fishball: U ,,ÒᆺÒ,,U ♡
Bebe: '…' Bebe thought Bebe was the best…. QwQ Not that Bebe cares… Peh…
After doing all sorts of things, that, if Fishball was a real animal, would probably need to call Animal Protection Services for, such as twisting, painfully rubbing, and biting the cute plump feathery body of the bunny, Jia Hyson felt very refreshed.
Once he finished playing, he threw aside the feathery Fishball in boredom like a scum child. "Okay Bebe, let's do something else."
Fishball: U QᆺQU
Bebe: Heh.
Because he had struggled so much with the white lotus acting class last time he had cancelled most of the other classes he had signed up for at the time.
It should be noted, he had to be recommended extra classes and was suggested to do a full semester course which includes actual grading when he came back from this world. Unfortunately, even though a recommendation from a teacher is less a recommendation and more 'strongly insists like how an anaconda on your neck strongly insists you stop breathing,' Jia Hyson didn't have much interest in restarting it right now.
Him cancelling all the previous classes was fine, after all, there was no cancellation fee and he was given a full refund thanks to the humane system world's policies in regard to education. But the problem was now that it's been pushed off, Jia Hyson is too lazy to start it.
It was like the previous motivation was just a dream.
This is the problem of many people. Motivation, determination, these sort of things, it is like a spark on a cold windy day. If you don't jump at it and cultivate it carefully, it will quickly extinguish and it is a bit difficult to find it again.
For some people, maybe the spark is very strong and can continue to persist for a while, maybe it can turn into a warm fire on its own that only needs a bit of encouragement occasionally. But more often than not, people will have short-lived sparks.
Sometimes they can take care of it until it becomes fairly sustainable without too much effort but a lot of times, the moment when the spark is lit there were other external factors that prevented the person to take care of that spark.
For example, Jia Hyson suddenly has the inspiration and motivation to write something new. However this spark is quickly ignored because of all sorts of reasons like he is too busy with his current works, his editor had just arranged some PR stunt, his mother suddenly called him, there was a funny video a friend sent him, there was too much pressure, he just got a bad review or even that his lunch was ready to eat.
Maybe in his heart, he will swear to himself- just after this, give me a few minutes, let me just finish this first, then I will go back to you, I promise, this time I will focus on you.
Then, poof. The spark is gone. Maybe the inspiration and idea are still present, but the urge to start certainly isn't.
This is just for things you enjoy doing, for things like classes that are not for enjoyment but more self-improvement… haha, Jia Hyson would like to say the distress he feels when the motivation is gone is the same amount of distress he has when looking at a messy bed- almost zero.
Still, now that he has time he can muster up some strength to force himself to do some classes. Partially since he has time to kill, partially because he is interested in interacting with more hosts.
In the end, he does continue his previous intentions in the fourth world to consolidate some of his linguistic knowledge and continue to book an animal language class.
Specifically, specialising in the classes for chickens and ducks, and dogs. Because in a modern-day world it may be more convenient to have some understanding of basic dog speech. Cats not so much, after all, most cats are quite haughty, it's not only harder to communicate with them but harder to approach them at all.
He also decides to do a toy-making class. Jia Hyson had always been a little interested in that as a child. Maybe because he has a childish heart he always kept a little dream about being able to make all sorts of fun things, however, it was a small dream and not a passion.
His family life was okay, if you ignore his father, the family was very close-knit and in terms of money, it was not bad off. But there was still the standard pressure most children had growing up, with the expectations of good grades to produce more good grades in order to get into a university that will lead to a stable and hopefully high paying job.
When he was younger he was more arts inclined, dreaming of being an artist, then a comic book artist, an animator, a mangaka, a fashion designer…
If you have ever had typical Asian parents most people will be able to imagine what the response to such career choices would be.
Parents: Ha. Ha.
Ah, nothing like the denial of a dream. QwQ
Honestly, his art and crafts were pretty good, and his drawing was enough to be praiseworthy. But the level was only praiseworthy for middle schoolers at best.
Jia Hyson, after a few years of doing art classes, calmly faced the fact that he was very far from any sort of professional level. While he liked it, he was pragmatic and was more inclined in securing financial stability and knew a career for himself in art was not one of them. It was better as a hobby.
In the end though, whether it was possibly being faced with his own lacking art skills, depression, academic stress or something else, ironically he dropped his interest in art out of his own violation and it was his mother who became concerned and tried to encourage him to at least continue for fun. Jia Hyson did appreciate it but at the time he was simply not interested and only picked it up occasionally when he felt the urge.
Because his other big hobby of reading was cheap and there were few problems except probably the excessive time finishing a good story and neglecting schoolwork, there wasn't too much fuss over it and he continued to safely enjoy this hobby. This wanton love for reading that only became more excessive after dropping art, eventually lead to picking up writing. And so this subsequently became his future career in the end, despite all the previous planning for stability and ambition for pursuing art.
Life is funny that way ah. Sometimes you will drop something and think yourself talentless, only to find that there was a talent you had all along that you previously ignored and never discovered because of your previous stubborn thoughts and narrow worldview.
However, now that Jia Hyson has the opportunity, time, and was fairly rich in p, he felt maybe it was good to try to go back to learning some things he was always interested in doing when he was younger but always made excuses to not do, even after so many lifetimes. While he knew he wasn't very talented, he had time to work on it now. With no pressure and expectations, it became much easier to explore all the paths you had wanted to before.
Besides, even though this probably wasn't a useful class and probably many hosts would pick something more practical, Jia Hyson felt like with how his system works, he has the opportunity to learn those things anyway in the worlds he transmigrates to since he enters fairly early before the plot takes place. Therefore he might as well choose classes based on his own personal interests and enjoyment to enrich himself at his own pace.
Besides, learning a few nifty tricks and fun facts won't hurt ah. ¯_(ツ)_/¯
Bebe, knowing the fickle mindedness of its host also thoughtfully booked the earliest class sessions for him.
With the idea to try things that he wanted to do in his original life in mind, Jia Hyson also picks one other class which was the gardening class. He didn't book a whole course but chose to take only a class on the basics of growing and maintaining indoor pot plants.
"My mother loved to collect indoor plants when I was in university," Jia Hyson sighs a little wistfully. "Now is as good a time as any to learn ah."
"Why didn't you learn from your mother back then?" Bebe asks curiously.
"Ah, well," Jia Hyson coughs embarrassedly, "We fought over the pot plants when I was younger, more as a joke but it's undeniable I somewhat resented them on some level for taking my mother's attention away from me."
In fact, fighting was a bit of an understatement. A re-enactment of an afternoon soap opera was probably more accurate.
Generally, it would go something like this:
Scene- the house, Jia Hyson's mother walks in with new plants.
With wide eyes, Jia Hyson will stare at his unfaithful mother and point at the plants with the rage of an abandoned housewife.
Jia Hyson would then proceed to shoot the stereotypical dramatic barrage one would see in a cheating scene. Calling out to throw out these 'green bastards', his mother's illegitimate children, and accuse her of cheating on him by bringing these outsiders into their home while he was outside working hard for the family.
Some of his most used lines were-
"They may be green but the one who is truly green* is clearly me."
*reference to being cuckolded
"Shameless woman, I only look away and you've brought a new baby home. No... this place can no longer be called home anymore... it is merely... a house."
"After everything, I've done for you... are you willing to throw what we have away for some pretty young thing??"
His mother would scold him for swearing at his new 'siblings' then accuse him of leaving her all alone, can't be helped, pot plants A, B and C were so pitiful how could she not bring them home.
"You are green? Perfect, you will have something to talk about with your new siblings."
"If it's a house for you it is still a home for me and my new plants."
"For pretty young things on discount? Mother is willing" :)
Young Jia Hyson: Fuck, are you really my mother.
Typically Jia Hyson would, in response, usually clutch his chest pitifully and sadly tell her how she has changed and that their mother-son relationship has lost its spark after so many years.
Then his mother would roll her eyes and make kissy faces at the green bastards before telling him to go water the other children, making Jia Hyson screech incoherently about the humiliation of catering to the bastards' whims but will still do it anyway. In short, there was probably five seasons worth of Little Hyson's household fight with his mother's indoor houseplants.
Bebe: ...
The Jia family household sounds like it was a lively place.
…
Before they attended the first class which was basic chicken and duck languages, Jia Hyson decided to go take a walk in Hostland and eat some food.
Bebe was more familiar with Hostland and transported him to an area similar to a marketplace, full of mainly stalls. These stalls were by a mixture of hosts and systems who rented the place to practice their cooking skills. There were also stores with more high-class food products that took longer to make. Many of those stores were spaces for various cooking classes, and certain class exams would be conducted there as well.
Jia Hyson looks around with great interest. The streets weren't deserted but you wouldn't call it bustling either. That's mainly because while Hostland was definitely very nice, Hostland was an incredibly large space and most hosts were already more interested in working than playing around for long periods of time. Especially the ones who want to go back to their own world.
Going back to their world right before they died cost 100 million p. If they want to go to a time before that, the price is higher depending. For example, if a middle-aged man wanted to go back to when he was a child the price is roughly tripled maybe quadrupled depending on how active the person's life was. This is fair, after all this sort of time travel paradox thing was quite a complicated procedure to accomplish.
Still, for Jia Hyson who wasn't interested in such an end goal, it didn't matter much to him.
"I want cake!" Jia Hyson exclaims, "Bread! Oh god, I want so much bread. Let's go to an Italian place, I am going to commit mass murder on a pizza."
Bebe: ಠ_ಠ …how do you- never mind.
Jia Hyson's mouth was practically drowning in drool as his nose was assaulted with the scents of freshly baked, grilled, and roasted food. It was true he lived the high life in the last world, but how could he not be dissatisfied with the lack of international cuisine.
The main thing was the wheat. Wheat was ground and used as noodles and dumpling skins and buns. And that was fine. Noodles, dumplings and buns were delicious.
But god. Jia Hyson was willing to die for some freshly baked rosemary focaccia with crisp, cold and sour-sweet bruschetta on top…
Or a bagel…
Oh, what he would have done for a toasted garlic sesame bagel layered with a large amount of cream cheese, then some jalapeño pieces for a spicy kick, then of course smoked salmon and then some pickles, and a spread of tangy tomato relish and sweet dijon honey mustard…
In the end, Jia Hyson was overwhelmed with indecision and bought something from the closest shop in the area he was transported to. It was one of those large American slices of pizza which was not really what he had in mind at all but damn, that was some good stuff.
Strolling through the street he practically swallows the deliciously oily, cheesy slice down as his throat whole, like a snake, as his eyes gleam predatorily toward all the more western food stalls.
If Bebe didn't know better, it would really think Jia Hyson was hunting down his next fuck buddy.
The stall and shop owners under Jia Hyson's heated gaze: (」,,,゜ロ゜,,)」?! Eh?! I-is he looking at me?
In the end, Jia Hyson inexplicably got quite a few discounts and extra samples of food. Throwing another small packet of hot crispy chips into Bebe's space, Jia Hyson chews on a freshly grilled shish kebab charred under an open flame. The meat was juicy and the Mediterranean mix of spices in the marinade made his nose and mouth tingle in the best way.
Incredibly happy Jia Hyson shoved the napkin with the kebab owner's contact number and name into his pocket and ran to the churro stall. He only had twenty minutes before his class started, so he might as well make the most of it ah!
…
The first class he took was for the language of chickens and ducks. Since Jia Hyson had experience with chickens at least it was not too bad…. Depending on who you asked. Jia Hyson at least thought he did quite well.
"Cluck, cluck, cluck." A hen fluffed up her feathers.
"Cluck, cluck, cluck, coo, cluck," Jia Hyson softly clucks.
The hen preens and walks away a short distance, then after scratching the dirt a bit, she squats on the ground submissively and lowers her wings. "Cluck," She glances at Jia Hyson coquettishly.
Jia Hyson looks up at his teacher who was staring at him with an indescribable look. "Teacher James, do I pass?"
Teacher James laughs angrily, "I told you to ask Missy if she was hungry! Not to fucking have sex with her!"
Jia Hyson looks at Missy the chicken, who was beginning to look impatient as she wriggles her butt and glances at Jia Hyson more frequently, and falls into silence.
"Well," He finally says, "She wasn't hungry, but she was definitely thirsty ah."
Teacher James closes his eyes and draws a cross on his chest as he mutters something. After some deep breaths, Teacher James opens his eyes and calmly looks at Jia Hyson with a calm smile that was quite unnerving to look at. "You seem fairly fluent in basic chicken, duck is similar but not, a bit like your Chinese language with many dialects. I will introduce you to Daniel the duck and teach you greetings, body language to look for and how to ask basic directions and questions again… once we do that we'll go back to chickens again."
Jia Hyson blinks. That seemed fair. "Am I going to meet Missy again?"
"NO!" Teacher James shouts before coughing awkwardly, "I mean, no, Missy will probably take some time to… calm herself. I'll find a rooster instead, they're more aggressive so it'll be useful to learn the warning signs easier as well."
"Uhm, actually I-"
"Let's go!" Teacher James practically ran to the duck pond, leaving Jia Hyson with Missy who was still presenting to him. "…Bebe I think I'm going to have to learn as much as I can from this, you helping me take notes?"
"Oh yeah," Bebe dryly replies, "Because Bebe knows you're never going to be allowed back in this class again."
…
The animal language class for dogs was much more popular than for chickens and ducks. However, nobody was very interested in talking with each other.
Jia Hyson could only say, fair enough.
After all- Puppy.
Puppy cute.
Very cute.
Too cute.
'Please host don't do anything bad.' Bebe begs in his head. 'System SoSo and it's stupid host is here too, don't make Bebe lose face in front of that bitch!'
Jia Hyson who was playing with a fluffy brown puppy and rubbing it enthusiastically while trying to mimic barking sounds, rolls his eyes as he silently communicates with his annoying system, 'You fucking relax, I've lived hiding my psychopathic violent tendencies for so long, I can control my overwhelmingly extreme cute aggression okay?'
'You're first thought when you saw the puppies being released was, and Bebe quotes, 'Ahhhhh! They're so cute I want to punch their cute little faces and chop off their little baby paws and swallow them whole!!!'' Bebe snaps.
Jia Hyson sighs heavily, 'Bebe, they're really cute ok. I'm not going to do it ah, I'm not that bad.'
Bebe: 'You forget Bebe can see the images in your head.'
Jia Hyson: '…' He still wasn't going to do it! Damn! Is it his fault they're so punchably cute?!?!
Bebe: '…' Bebe isn't sure what its host's period of silence means but Bebe senses the answer is yes.
…
There were a few days between the language classes and the toy making and gardening class to avoid being exhausted. Jia Hyson spent it lazing around, reading, watching garbage and occasionally going out to chat up cute hosts.
Sharing a freshly fried, crispy churro with the handsome kebab host from beforehand, Jia Hyson felt pretty content.
Ah, life was good.
…
"This is not bad." Jia Hyson comments idly as he clumsily sews the seam of his plushie manta ray. The minky fabric was soft and very comfortable under his fingertips, even if it was a bit hard to keep it from shifting a bit, Jia Hyson didn't want to compromise on the feeling of the fabric.
The top of the manta plush was navy blue with star patterns, and of course, the bottom was a basic white minky fabric. Coupled with the big black shiny eyes, it was incredibly cute. Seeing it slowly come together made Jia Hyson very satisfied.
"It's pretty good," Another host sitting across from him comments with some envy. The host was a young teenage girl that looked like she might be of Spanish descent, Jia Hyson wasn't sure, he was never great at the stupid 'Guess the Race' game. After meeting such a variation of hosts over time, he felt such a thing had become even more redundant than he already had thought it was.
Despite them being different races, of course, there is a problem with the language barrier. Fortunately, all classes are equipped with universal translators so there's very little problem
The teenage girl host was currently trying to sew the wings for her bat plushie. Jia Hyson had signed up for the classes more inclined to simple hand-sewn and crafted soft toys and plushies.
It was a fairly simple class format, after doing some practice stitches and learning the differences of fabrics and other products, they would be given an array of 'patterns' to choose from and take their time to make their toys under the supervision of the teacher. If they had time they could make more than one, either way, they got to bring anything they make back to their safe space. It was a very relaxing class that gave everyone the opportunity to chat while they work.
They even served snacks and tea in between. And not just the basic cucumber ham finger sandwiches and cheap cookies, but proper little cakes, little bruschetta bites, sushi, sliders, mini tacos and so on. Mess is not a problem as they provide a magical item from Bebay called- Fabric Stain Remover. _(:3」∠)_
"Haha, it's just because I chose one of the easier design patterns," Jia Hyson humbly replies. He had nothing to prove in picking anything elaborate anyway, his personal taste in plushies was that simple was best. He didn't actually like plushies with too much sewing and accessories on them, for him, the simple touch, the feeling of softness and comfortability was more important. "Truthfully if you look closer my stitches are really uneven unlike yours."
The teenager beams, "Thanks!" Warming up to him, she introduces herself, "I'm Isabel, I have a helpful female supporting lead system." She pats her chest assuringly, "Despite how I look, I've gone through over eight worlds with good marks! It's why I can finally afford to do a few classes ah."
Jia Hyson's mouth twitches slightly. While he doesn't know the average pay of basic systems he knows that it's not as good as a specialised system. He has the feeling that if he reveals the amount of p he earns in each world he would probably be beaten up no? "I am Jia Hyson, it's a pleasure to meet you."
Isabel didn't seem to realise he hadn't revealed his system type and smiled a little foolishly, "Hyson? Is that English? But your Asian right? So that means it's your first name right? Unless you introduced yourself the western way? Then I should call you Jia?"
Jia Hyson's face becomes a bit embarrassed at the barrage of words, and he coughs awkwardly. His name wasn't just awkward to his fellow Chinese but also a bit confusing to foreigners as well. Who told the people who brought him into the world to be so bad at naming at the time? (Author God: I'm so sorry) "Yes, Hyson is my first name, just call me that."
The girl nods like a chicken pecking rice, very enthusiastically, it was hard to hate her. "I see, I see, Uncle Hyson it is!"
Uncle Jia Hyson: '…' Girl, if you went through eight worlds you might be even older than me ah.
"Pftt-!" An older woman who was next to him tried but failed to hold back her laughter. "Ahaha, sorry, sorry, I couldn't help but overhear." She chuckles, "Your name is very… green tea… green tea uncle… ha ha ha…"
Green tea uncle Jia Hyson: '…' This old man is being bullied but can't refute anything.
After finishing having a good chuckle, she introduces herself, "Sorry again, I'm Su Lin. Ah, I guess Lin Su to you though." Lin Su chuckles again, "I've been taking a lot of worlds with western settings these days so I've been getting mixed up to be honest."
Fortunately, Jia Hyson was fairly used to his name being taken strangely and was generally quite patient in socialising. Laughing along Jia Hyson skilfully continues the conversation, "Really? That must be a lot of worlds then ah. What do you do?"
"I'm a System Law Enforcement Officer," Lin Su smiles proudly, "So the SLEO system."
Jia Hyson and Isabel look blankly at her. Of course, most hosts were chosen with their personality in consideration, generally, most hosts will not be so 'sensitive' to a little ego bruising. Even if Lin Su's job wasn't recognised she happily and patiently explains what she does, "You've heard of bugs, world breakers and world hackers, right? Essentially, if a host finds one and it seems a bit difficult to deal with we'll be called to help. Not just that, we will also come to investigate various circumstances and cases as well as chase down the more notorious villains."
Isabel's eyes were practically shining with respect and admiration. "That's amazing!" She praises, her vocabulary wasn't very eloquent but the enthusiasm more than made up for it. Lin Su held her chin up, pleased.
Jia Hyson, while less exaggerated also gave the woman a lot of face and showed an awed expression. If there was one thing he had learned when he took up the slightly unconventional hobby of murder, was not to be stupid and provoke law enforcement. In fact, it was best to befriend a few if possible for convenience and safety.
Lin Su's plush was one of the more complicated designs available, an elephant, the type that should be able to stand up alone when properly stuffed. With a girl who liked to talk, a lady who liked praise and Jia Hyson who was skilled at witty conversation, the three chatted along happily as they continued to make their plushies. Because of their jobs as hosts, they were used to socialising with new people and it made it very easy to become friendly.
Because Jia Hyson's was the simplest he made a larger manta plushie after finishing his first one, making the dorsal side a mossy dark green. Since he was more or less aware of the steps, his hands became a bit faster and soon he had finished once more before Isabel had even gotten her bat's head attached to its body.
"Gilipollas*," Isabel swore angrily seeing the smaller starry manta sit on top of the big green manta smugly. "You can't make another manta or I'm going to declare your cheating."
*Douchebag/bastard in spanish
"Tsk," Jia Hyson rolls his eyes as he touches his two plushies intimately, "This isn't a test I can make an army of mantas and there's nothing you can do to stop me."
"You must like mantas a lot ah," Lin Su comments as she struggles with her own plushie.
"Well, it's cute," Jia Hyson shrugs, "Plus it's easy."
Isabel and Lin Su: '…how candid.'
Still, he changed his design pattern anyway, he had an image in mind he wanted to pursue. Bringing back various different flower designs, the two women watched curiously as he slowly made various little plush flowers and plants. The design was even simpler than the manta and quickly he had a small pile.
It was only after moving the green manta closer to himself and placing the flowers on its 'wings' did they understand what he was doing.
"That's such a cute idea!" Isabel claps, "A garden on the manta, I like it a lot!"
"En, you're quite the creative." Lin Su nods, "I might do that for my elephant if I have time."
"Same, same!"
Jia Hyson glances at their unfinished plushies and smiles meaningfully. "I see," He simply said.
Isabel and Lin Su: '…' Peh! Smelly man! Looking down on our girl power!
The women both look at each other and their rather unsightly creations and fall silent. Well… just because they were females they shouldn't be expected to be good at sewing ah! This is the time of love and equality!
Jia Hyson: "I'm going to make a seal now, what are you guys going to do- oh wait. Heh."
Isabel and Lin Su: (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻
….
The gardening class started straight after the plushie class. Fortunately, it was in a space that simulated an outdoor garden so it gave people the opportunity to stretch one's legs and look around if they wished. The format of the class was similar to the toy-making class except there was more emphasis on theoretical knowledge. It was more or less common sense though, and the plants they could pot all came with a small information sheet to help.
Since the animal communication classes, Bebe really couldn't take it anymore and treated itself as a driver, going off to drop off its host before going off to play. It was only when he picked Jia Hyson up afterwards did Bebe get to see the results of what the other had done during the lesson.
"This is Bastard 1, this is Bastard 2, Bastard 3, Spiky Piece of Shit, Small Bastard-"
Bebe: "Oh… I see someone still isn't fully over their childhood bullshit huh."
"-and Cutie."
Cutie was a fuzzy white bushy plant with a small purple-red flower bud sitting prominently on a branch. It was indeed a very cute looking plant. But the thing was, none of the other plants really lost out aesthetically either. Even if Jia Hyson said they were bastards, the plants he picked were really quite lovely. After all, these were houseplants you got to bring home so he wouldn't wrong himself by picking ugly ones.
For example, Bastard 1 was a pearl variant of a mini Jade plant but the edges of its leaves shone with a pale silvery iridescence like the nacre of the mother of pearl. Bastard 2 was a Prayer plant (Calathea Ornata) which, instead of the usual green leaves with striped pink markings, was actually the reverse, with the leaves being a lovely pastel purple-pink with contrasting dark green stripe markings. Bastard 3 was a golden philodendron. Spikey Piece of Shit was… well it was just a light blue saguaro cactus, and finally Small Bastard was a plant commonly known as Baby Toes.
All in all, while it depended on preference, most of them were roughly on the same beauty level as Jia Hyson's favoured Cutie.
"Cutie is something called a, ah, Baby ljuv Berry, white variant." Jia Hyson happily explains, "Ijuv in Swedish means sweet, apparently, a Swedish host found this and brought it back from a fantasy world as they found it was quite easy to transplant. The berries are supposedly really delicious~"
Bebe felt it was a little interesting to hear until it vaguely realised something. Looking at the other plants that had been, while not neglected, but treated much less dotingly, Bebe couldn't help but voice out its suspicion. "Hey… Host, are you basing your plant's likability on whether you could eat them or not?"
"Hmmm, well yes, and also if they produce nice flowers too." Jia Hyson absentmindedly replies as he adjusts the solar lamp he had bought to give his Cutie the best angle.
Bebe: '…' Bebe knew it!
Indoor houseplants were generally leafy plants or succulents that don't often flower much less bear fruits. Most of the appeal was the greenery they produced, the variations of leaf shapes, and their relatively easier maintenance.
Jia Hyson was the type that liked aesthetics but always added more points in his heart for practicality. Plus, after living with the other so long, of course Bebe knew that the other was more attracted to looking at flowers, especially ones that attracted birds and insects.
Seeing the bastards all huddled in a corner with only Cutie sitting on a stool under the solar lamp like it was the star of the most boring theatre show in the world, Bebe couldn't help but pity them. It seems history is really doomed to repeat itself. Fortunately, Bebe will be here to remind its spicy chicken host.
After four lessons and various miscellaneous small purchases such as buying food, love hotel fees, decorations and a few basic clothes, they had spent about 2749p, which wasn't really much. Seeing the 183,496 p still left Jia Hyson was tempted to play around a bit more.
However, in the end, he was still a little eager to go to the next world.
Refreshed, and full of vigour Jia Hyson sits on the bed and gives one last pat to Fishball. "Let's go, Bebe~"
"Fu- wait Bebe needs to save Bebe's game!"
Jia Hyson: '…' This fucking game addict was more tempted to play around than himself. 눈_눈
After waiting a few minutes Jia Hyson takes out his phone starts to scroll mindlessly again. Ah, he really hopes the setting will have wi-fi accessible to him. He's going to be high-key pissed if it's another ancient type world.
"Okay! Bebe is ready!" Bebe happily declares before seeing the salted fish appearance of its host. "Tsk, tsk, you're still not ready yet?"
Jia Hyson: '…' ( º言º) "You fucking garbage piece of-"
"Initializing.. prepare for transmigration in 3… 2… 1…"
…
When Jia Hyson opens his eyes he frowns and wriggles around. Twisting and turning, he looks around with his limited mobility before immediately recognising where he was and relaxing.
Ah, it was just a coffin.
Bebe: 'How the fuck can you tell so quickly.' SusEyes.jpeg
創作者的想法 
LittleBlueLake
LittleBlueLake ITS FINALLY TIME
LOVE ME WITH A REVIEW, CHAPTER COMMENT, KOFI OR IDK FANART OR SOMETHING
JUST LOOOVEEEE MEEEEE
(also happy to see yall enjoy the AN, I'll probs do another one when I introduce the arc ahahha orz it's always a bit nervewrecking cuz its my opinions ah but generally I only touch the themes a bit and make a bunch of jokes after so hopefully itll be fine~)
-- 收到的禮物 
-- 推薦票
榜單 
-- 推薦票