Chương 11: 11
Every dream was about my beautiful Mate. I want her so bad but I am keeping control. I get dressed and head out for morning training.
"Alright! Same as yesterday! Start running!" I order everyone complies. I watch them run completely unfocused.
"You alright Gamma?" Beta Malak asks.
"Not at all... but I'm keeping it together. I should be fine as long as.." I start.
"Asher." She stops me. I growl "talk to me please?!"
"Beta." I say with a clenched jaw. "You wanted to punch me? Do it now."
"Its no fun if you want me to." He responds.
"Knock me out before I do something I'll regret." I growl walking towards Emily unable to stop myself.
"Stop now Gamma!" Beta Malak orders. I growl tackling my mate ready to mark her.
Before I can bite her I am pulled off by two wariors.
"I'm sorry Asher." The Beta says. A sudden fist to my temple and darkness takes over.
○●○●○
I wake up in a hospital room.
"Morning sunshine!" Beta Malak greets me.
"Where is she?" I ask.
"Alpha's house... but..." He responds.
In a second I am off the bed and out the door. I hear an "oh crap!" Behind me followed by feet but I cant stop. I need her.
"Stop now!" A guard orders as I approach the house. I ignore him so he grabs my shoulder in an attempt to stop me. With a growl I snap his forearm with enough force that the fractured bones puncture his skin. His screams alert the other two men.
"What the?!"
"STOP!"
They yell trying to tackle me. I punch the first one knocking him out. The other one hits me and we fall to the ground. I am quickly on top of him beating him bloody.
"Asher!"
"MATE!"
I jump off the man taking my mate in my arms.
"Mate." I repeat ready to mark her.
I cant think straight all I can focus on is her being mine. I nuzzle into her neck as I open my mouth to make the mark I am pulled away and held in a iron grip.
"STOP!" The King commands but I am to far gone for it to have an affect on me as I fight for release. "Doc!" He yells and with a sharp pain in my neck a burning sensation floods my body and I am greeted by darkness once again.
○●○●○
"About time you woke up!" The doctor says as I open my eyes.
My mind is thankfully clear. I cant believe I was going to mark her!
"Hello Asher." The King says as he enters the room. "Glad to see you feeling better."
"Thank you sir... I'm sorry about all of this... how long was I out?" I ask.
"Its not your fault pup... we were starting to think the mark wouldn't fade. It usually takes two to three days but we've had to keep you sedated for a week." He tells me.
"A week!?" I yell amazed. "What about the training?"
"Malakai stuck to the schedule you put in place. He tells me they have improved substantially." He says.
"Good... I need to get out of here. I cant lose a week. I need to train myself. I've never gone that long without training." I tell him standing up out of the bed.
"Wait a minute Ash." I stop and look at him. "We need to talk about Emily."
"Don't worry Alpha. I plan on avoiding her for the time being. I won't mark her sir. I give you my word." I promise him.
"No Asher... you need to talk to her. She is a mess right now. She needs you. She needs to know you aren't angry with her. She thinks you hate her." The King tells me. I can see he is hurting for his daughter.
"I don't hate her... I couldn't. I'm not angry... I just... I don't know why she did it. I've tried to make it clear that she shouldn't get close. I don't want to hurt her and I know the closer she gets to me the more I will hurt her. She is just so dang persistent!" I explain.
"If you have no interest in being her mate then reject her. She doesn't deserve your hot, cold treatment. Make a decision boy. You may not want to hurt her but you are. You are driving her crazy. I know you aren't ready to be a mate. Try explaining that to her so she can understand your behavior. Stop hurting my Baby or I will hurt you." After his speech the King leaves.
I can't do this. I can't reject her and she wont give up!
"Accept her. Be her mate. Then you wont have to stress over this!" My wolf says.
"You can shut up! You're the one who convinced her to do this! You hurt our mate!" I respond.
"Lay it all out for her. Your plan to kill yourself, your past, why you're pushing her away. Do that and let her decide what she wants."
"She will be hurt."
"She will be hurt either way... this way she has a choice."
He's right. If she knows she will stop perusing this and she wont get hurt as badly. Keeping her in the dark isn't working.
I leave the hospital and follow my nose until I find her. She is sitting in the dining hall playing with her lunch. I can see the tears in her eyes. I can't believe I did this to her. I want her smile back.
"Emily." I say standing behind her.
"Asher!" She gasps jumping up. She steps forward to hug me but stops herself and backs up. Her reaction makes my wolf whine in my head. "I'm so sorry. My stupid wolf thought it would help. Obviously she was wrong. Please don't hate me." She apologizes.
"I could never hate you Meme... let's talk somewhere more... private." I say gesturing towards the door. She nods enthusiastically grabbing my hand and dragging me out the door and into the garden. She doesn't stop until we are in the middle of a hedge maze.
"No one comes in here... what do you want to talk about?" She says sitting on the fountain that marks the middle.
"I'm going to explain everything to you. In the end I'll do what ever you want but you need to consider what I say before you decide." I say.
"Ok... tell me."
"I've been pushing you away to protect you. I dont want you to get hurt when I die in this war." I start.
"If Asher! If you die! And you won't! You are a strong wolf you will come home alive!" She argues.
"I won't... I don't want to. I'm a killer Emily. I'm not a good man. The things I've done. The pain I've caused. I cant live with it! I don't deserve to live... to be happy! I will train the warriors. I will fight. Once my brothers are incarcerated or dead I plan to allow myself to be killed by the hunters. I will die before this war ends because I have chosen to die. If you want me you have me. I won't fight it any more... But you will only have me until the war is done." I tell her.
"I would take a day with you as my mate over months with you avoiding me. I'll take what time I can get... and who knows? Maybe you will decide you want to live." She says hopefully.
"Emily... I won't. Becoming Gamma didn't sway me and neither will becoming your mate. I love you Meme but I cant do it. I'll give you my all but in the end... you will lose me. Is that what you really want? To know you will lose your mate? You could just reject me and find someone who can live for you. You can do better than me." I try to persuade her.
"Shut up Asher! I will NEVER reject you... if I only get a few months with my mate so be it but you ARE my mate and I won't give you up!" She yells springing up from the fountain and pinning me against the hedge wall. I flip out positions and look down at her.
"So be it little mate." I say capturing her lips with my own. "Set the date Emily... whenever you choose I will become yours."
"One week... we do the ceremony in one week." She says gasping for breath.
"As you wish." I say kissing her again.
"Told you I'd get my mate!" My wolf grins.
"Shut up!" I respond as I I continue the kiss.
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