Chương 16: Impulse...
Lucian remained on his knees for more than a minute. Simon's reaction had been out of nowhere, but he had let the boy be. Simon was probably angry, and he was in no position to tell him how to feel at the moment, after all he was the reason why the boy was hurt. All he wanted to do was help in any way he could, but apparently his efforts had not been appreciated.
Rising from his knees, he returned the first aid box back to its original position before returning to his bed. He wanted to be free, to explore the world, but he had learnt now that the outside world wasn't a bed of roses. Perhaps his father was right for keeping him indoors all the time, people like him were not exactly loved by the general public. To them, he was like a tool, a means to earn favor and wealth.
A soft knock on the door broke through his thoughts. Lucian hesitated, unsure if he wanted to face anyone right now. He needed his rest, and he didn't want disturbance. He knew it wasn't Mark, he had made it clear to Mark that he was off for the rest of the day. So who on earth was it this time?
He remained silent, hoping the knocker would give up and leave after not receiving a response, but they persisted.
"Just get out—"
He hadn't finished when the door creaked open, and Simon stepped into the room. His expression was softer now, and he didn't look like he was about to implode with rage.
Lucina's expression softened as well at the sight before him. He had just been on his way to give anybody else besides Simon a thorough scolding for not leaving him alone.
"Simon.." he called out softly, surprised to see his squire before him. "Is something wrong?"
"I didn't mean to snap at you the way I did. It's just that everything was so overwhelming at the moment.."
"I know," Lucian replied quietly. "I understand. I just wanted to help, but I realize now that maybe I overstepped—"
"No, it's none of that. You were only trying to help.." Simon interjected sharply. He hesitated unsure if he should walk in or stay out, his hand still gripping the door. Lucian's calm demeanor only made him feel worse for his earlier outburst. He shouldn't blame the prince, Harold had a habit of being a bully, and the same would have happened regardless of who he had come with.
"It wasn't your fault," Simon finally said, stepping further into the room. His voice was barely above a whisper, and he struggled to keep his eyes focused on Lucian's. "I was just... so angry, and I didn't know where to put it all. You were only trying to help, and I lashed out at you."
A smile crossed Lucian's face, and with a smile he gestured for Simon to sit. "I can still treat you if you want. You don't want your wounds getting infected now, do you?"
Once more Simon froze, unsure if he should take the offer or not. Running away like earlier was not an option anymore, he would only look foolish, and at this point Lucian would probably consider it disrespectful.
After a minute of contemplation, Simon slowly stepped into the room, the door closing behind him with a soft click. The air between them was thick with unspoken words, but he managed to walk through without losing his cool.
He hesitated at first, his thoughts darting back and forth with different choices. Should he take this offer, or refuse and return to his chambers? It took a while z but finally Simon obeyed, sitting stiffly on the edge of the bed. He was still sorry for acting out of line earlier, but Lucian didn't seem to care about it anymore. Instead, the prince reached for the first aid box a second time.
"Don't worry, I won't bite.." Lucian teased after he noticed the tension in his squire's eyes. He knew this was awkward, and he definitely felt odd as well. It was his first time serving someone, and while it was not something he could get used to, it didn't feel wrong with Simon. This man had saved his life after all, tending to an injury was nothing compared to that.
As Lucian cleaned his wounds with careful attention, Simon's gaze never left his face. He studied the way Lucian's brow furrowed slightly in concentration, the way his lips pressed together as he worked, the way his eyes, soft and concerned, flicked up occasionally to meet Simon's. It was the first time in Simon's life that someone was caring for him like this. His mother never really cared for him, and he had been the one doing the providing and caring all his life. Perhaps that was why he felt so strange.
"You didn't have to do this," Simon whispered, his voice rough. "I'm just your squire."
Lucian didn't speak, he wouldn't argue with Simon a second time. He understood that he was equally stunned by the fact that the prince was tending to him this way, and he genuinely had no answer to that. He wanted to answer that it was because Simon had saved him, but that wasn't entirely it. Perhaps he just wanted to experiment on how it felt serving others, or maybe it was this weird feeling bubbling up inside of him, one that made him consider Simon as someone more than just a squire.
The silence between the two of them was loud, and the tension only seemed to get heavier. Simon's gaze remained on the prince, each passing second torturous to him mentally. Something was wrong with him, and he was doing his best to fight it.
It was right on his mind, and his curiosity was getting the better of him. He couldn't stop himself from thinking about what other things those hands could do, what those lips tasted like...
He knew he shouldn't be having these thoughts, but when someone as handsome as Lucian was this close to you, it became a near impossible task.
Impulsively, Simon slowly covered the distance between him and his helper. And before he had the chance to contain himself, his lips were pressed against that of Lucian's.
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