Chương 81: 1.Coco Jamboo.
I then went into the kitchen, and to my surprise, there were numbers one and two, and Mariella was cooking and making dessert. I was pissed off and royally too, and now I wouldn't be a nice little feeding girl. I let my attitude show when I went to the fridge and took one of the serving trolleys with me, where I would start stuffing everything.
Smoothies, meat, and lots of it, the fattest stuff I could find. The most fucked up part of this was when I couldn't get my weight up as easily as it went down. So, a week's dieting regimen wouldn't be fixed in a week.
I was probably dehydrated, my pounding headache and persistent nausea told me that much, and my vitamins and minerals were probably as depleted as they could be. There was just so much lost in my body and it would take time and a determined effort to get myself back in shape. Plus those four days that I was trapped in relentless nightmares. And before that damn teaching session for weeks.
When the cart was finally loaded with food, I made my way back to my place and carefully placed my selection on the table on my place to the heating pad so they would be hot. Only then did I venture over to check the number on my coffee. The aroma of the 70 different coffee bean options filled the air, enticing me. I took a moment to inhale deeply, allowing the rich scent to envelop my senses. After careful consideration, one particular blend stood out, its fragrance hitting me just right. I couldn't afford to choose the wrong kind, as it would only induce sleep, and I desperately wanted to stay awake.
With my chosen coffee blend in hand, I precisely measured out the correct amount and set it to brew. It had been a over a week since I had last indulged in coffee, or any food for that matter, so it would take some time for my body to adjust.
As I waited, Damon turned his gaze towards me, his eyes filled with surprise. Mariella also glanced in my direction, her concerned expression reflecting the toll my recent ordeal had taken on me.
Determined to regain my strength, I focused on consuming something before the coffee finished brewing. I and had my coke bottles ready. I drank eagerly, the cool liquid soothing my parched throat, as I tried to keep all the nourishment inside, allowing my body to gradually acclimate to the idea of sustenance.
Mariella approached and took a seat beside me, her voice filled with worry as she questioned, "Where have you been for over a week and a half, and why are you in such a state? You look pale, thin, and utterly exhausted."
Continuing to eat, I responded calmly, keeping my voice steady and suppressing any anger that threatened to seep through. "Ask Charles; he knows."
Damon made his way to the end of the table, settling down next to me, his voice barely above a whisper as he uttered, "So Charles..."
I met his gaze, realizing that he was unaware of, or perhaps hadn't assumed, the extent of Cornick's heinous actions. There was no need for me to sugarcoat the truth.
I spoke, "He tortured me for a week, using electric shocks to inflict pain, keeping me naked in a frigid cellar. And after he was done with his interrogations, he broke my neck. When I regained consciousness, I couldn't help but fall into a restless sleep, plagued by nightmares for four agonizing days. I was already in a weakened state after that grueling three-week ordeal. But I'm taking care of myself. That's what I've been doing. And I'm slowly getting back on track."
With each bite I took, my body gradually began to feel the familiar pang of hunger, finally processing the nourishment it so desperately needed.
Mariella silently communicated with Damon through their telepathic connection, her voice echoing in his mind. "You know something about that, don't you?"
Damon responded with a vague grunt, his eyes fixed on Mimi as she ate. The aftermath of whatever Cornick had done to her was evident. Burn marks marred her skin, though she attempted to conceal them. Damon had caught a glimpse of one. It had been a grueling and unpleasant ordeal for Mimi.
With a heavy sigh, Damon activated his radar, meticulously examining every issue plaguing Mimi. She hadn't eaten anything in over a week and a half, abstaining even from her beloved coffee. Her body showed signs of immense physical strain, and her mental state was equally troubled. Her temperature was unnaturally low, her weight a mere 38 kilos, and her blood values were erratic. Her anger simmered, threatening to consume her completely.
Damon had never promised to erase anything from Mimi's mind, a lesson he intended to teach Cornick. Steeling himself, Damon delved into the past, his shock palpable. He finally understood why the wolves shunned Charles.
Silently, he shared his revelation with Mariella, who sighed wearily. "Remember when two and five conducted that hospital session on Mimi? They were covered in black goo. This one has even more darkness inside. I should have the courage to dismantle it, but it's a daunting task if he's not involved."
Damon grunted in agreement. "Yeah, I'll assist you then. But that lady...damn it, Charles, don't think any further. She's harboring a powerful rage, and she won't let anyone interfere. We need a vacation now. It may seem cruel to Mimi, but first, we must address the issues within the Irish castle, meaning unloading the foursome. I'm certain each of them has their own troubles. And then, we'll go on the Azores holiday. Mimi will have to be alone. I dread the thought of her retreating into her shell and becoming an ice queen, but the pack must come first."
Mariella understood Damon's frustration. Despite the progress made with Mimi, his duty was to educate her if there was a need and he never regretted his lesson, and then Charles, he needed to unload that black goo. Damon hated always prioritizing the pack's well-being. There was no other option, no time when Mimi could be the top priority.
After I had finished eating, the three of them looked at me now and then, their gazes filled with a subtle mix of pity and concern. I could sense Damon's inner conflict, torn between his current actions and his desire for something different. As I continued to eat, I couldn't help but notice this dilemma plaguing him.
However, I knew that whatever it was, it would eventually be resolved as I patiently waited. The food was delicious, and I savored each bite, my enthusiasm evident. At some point, number two brought more food for me, disregarding any objections.
Finally, I reached the end of my meal, and Damon spoke up, "Now baby, what Charles did was not right. He didn't provide details, and I didn't explicitly give permission. But Cornick has a problem, and we need to take a vacation now. We'll disembark in Ireland, and you can do as you please. After the unloading, there will be a holiday, the duration of which is yet to be determined, but I'll inform you somehow. I didn't want to do this. My lesson was a minor setback but despite the setback, it's something I'll never regret. That's a fact."
I met Damon's gaze and replied, my voice cool and composed, "Salvatore, it's more than just a minor setback. However, fine. I'll be in touch in four months, every Monday. Until then, I'll retreat to my secluded island, away from any missions, seeking solace and recovery."
I couldn't hide my lingering anger over the entire ordeal. Damon nodded and was about to say something when he abruptly stood up and walked over to Mariella and the others. They vanished, teleporting to an unknown location.
I calmly made my way to the portal room and traveled to my Irish mansion. There, I possessed the means to reach my hidden island, a sanctuary that remained a secret from Charles and anyone else. It was my personal paradise, offering peace, safety, and the opportunity to indulge in cooking, tending to my orchids, and enjoying my own company, as I truly deserved.
The weight of the situation was palpable, and I couldn't help but acknowledge its significance. I had endured several challenges that had disrupted the equilibrium, meaning my pathos had grown a lot and I couldn't deny the impact they had on me. I was never gonna be a top priority. My pathos, and my needs, would never triumph over others. This was just another turn in my life, the beginning of the holiday season. Familiarity settled in, reminding me that not much changes, regardless of who makes promises or swears that things will be different.
Well, at least I would have time to get myself in shape and enjoy life, and then when the time came to go to the pack. I would be in top condition, full of energy and power, ready to try anything. But the unloading would have to stay, and I knew I could manage without unloading; after all, I had done nothing about it for seven years.
But I didn't have the time to spend blaming and digging up guilt. Charles did what he did, and I'm moving on. It's good to know that he has that side of him, even though it's never come up in my time except now. What it does to our relationship, I don't know, and frankly, I didn't even bother to think or reflect. What good would it do? It is one thing that needs us both to work on that thing out and there is no use in me to get my mind knotted over this. Only time would show us.
There was no perfect time for me in the pack. It was just a fact of life. Something I knew and someday maybe Pack would understand it too and just accept it. I have no idea why that was. Was it because I was Chaos or just not compatible with Pack's way of living? There can be so many reasons and it won't do any good for me to guess. It is just going with the flow again and seeing where I end up.
I would only distract myself further, which didn't help the pack improve. All the pack would see me as an ice queen again, and I've never actually been one. It's just been my defense mechanism, and I've never unpacked that perception in the pack. It had been safety protocol for me to be distant and almost emotionless, not reacting and just being in my peace. No need to show everyone how much I felt.
I would then see where I go and what I do when it's time to return to the pack, which would be the worry of the time. But I wouldn't openly run into anyone's arms or just say that nothing feels right. It was time for me to learn to show that I thought hard, hurt, and can be hurt deeply, and it all leaves a mark. It was time for me to learn to show my scars, at least some of them. I had no idea how they would react and what would come out of it.
Damon has never regretted his lessons, as he has always found a justification for them, that they are reactions, and he doesn't regret them. Well, I'll show them what comes of his response. Same with Charles. Let him not unravel; let him take out whatever demons he has.
And I'm tired of always being the one who doesn't get to react or feel. Who just has to accept it and move on? No more. The pack would see what it's like to live with me when I react, and oh, that I reacted. This would be new to me as I had never reacted, so I did not know what my reaction would even be.
Now, I didn't have to restrain myself, always be in control, and not show anything at all. Let's see how long the pack can take when I show my opinion. Then, we could analyze this reaction and consider the proper approach to dealing with it. But then, sometimes. Now, I didn't cook; now, I ate.
Damon, on the other hand, had made me a guide. And I followed it, ate as I should, swam, enjoyed myself, and slept because I was safe. I realized now that I was in complete control of my environment here so that I could sleep with no one. Learning this same system when I returned to the pack would be a good job.
It would be new for me to react, to speak up, to curse, to scream, to fuck, to slam doors if I feel like it, to even sulk. Then maybe we would get to know each other better, and that might help some people understand themselves better at the same time. I was never good with change, and it has been ever since.
I am chaos, the one who brings change, and don't like it when my life changes. When I thought about it, I had brought a big change to the world. The fleas and everything we had done. It had been changing for so many yet me to make this big change and I can't tolerate even a minor change in my life without getting irritated was somewhat almost amusing.
Oh, I enjoyed my life, and slowly but surely, I put myself in shape. This is my new attitude. Let's see how the pack puts up with me. Will there be demands for an ice queen after I've had my romp? Let's just see what kind of life we will have when I show them how mad I can be now. I swore to myself that I would snap on even small things too and teach this pack that I would be reacting for and long time.
Because I needed my freedom to react and needed it to happen to be in full control over my body, I made a few changes that ensured that I was not being controlled. For salvatores, I'm naughty. I'm strong, and I take care of myself. I've got a surgical robot, a procedure robot, here, and I'm going to program it to completely drain my flank organs and fill it with nothing but bumpy fluid, completely full. So much for getting me out cold, just pressing a button if my tantrums would be too much.
Now, I wouldn't be relatively so easy to control. I was determined to show the pack that it's all very well for the well-being of everyone else in the pack to be necessary, unload the black lump, and take a holiday, but not let me unpack and then look the other way when Charles tells his interrogation plans.
Now it was not gonna be just sorry baby, he did not tell everything to me about his plans. Well, you are a damn pack leader. It is your duty to be on top of things. Well, I would certainly give them a piece of my mind; it didn't matter about the time or passing time as long as you had a photographic memory.
These people don't know what's in it or don't always think. Charles, I know it's annoying when I have hides and meats, but lord knows when they're just meats. Our pack is filthy rich, and we can afford to buy meat. Don't appeal to my conscience and claim you have to hunt when I know you don't. And when these men have this same problem. I shouldn't buy anything or have any special meats stashed away. But when no one wonders why I hid those meats in the first place, when?
It had nothing to do with the pack, just for my safety; I hid many things because I didn't have a bubble of protection. I'm rich, and there are thieves, and I don't want to give thieves the meat or valuables and those shelters. When I wasn't in every house, I didn't have time to take them down and put them back in place, but it would be that when I came back to the pack, every hiding place would be removed, which would be good.
Then, as far as I'm concerned, there's nothing to hide; it may just be that every hiding place isn't so lovely to examine as there isn't always meat there. There might be papers, laptops from some medical facilities, or even old recordings of Damien, but I'm open, and I'll give the pack everything. Let's just see how long of a holiday this ends up being. But I'm not giving away my memories, not at all, and sometimes, if I have to erase a rotten memory, it will be under the careful consideration of who I do it with.
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