Chương 48: (The Longing)
Calum, aside from the Mariana case, now faced a multitude of charges: the Eagle and Crow case, and the far more serious accusation of being an assassin. He sat in his cell, his hands clenched tight around the cold steel bars, a stark symbol of his confinement. His father, Jack, was tirelessly working to secure his release, even resorting to a desperate plan: using Calum to eliminate Crow, Calum's former boss. This was Jack's primary strategy, his fervent hope for Calum's freedom. The truth was, Jack didn't particularly care whether Calum killed Crow or not; his only concern was his son's liberty. However, despite Jack's machinations, Calum consistently thwarted his efforts, becoming an insurmountable obstacle to his father's plans.
"Calum," a voice cut through Calum's turbulent thoughts.
"I told you, we need to cooperate!" Jack's voice, though strained, held an edge of desperation.
Calum turned, slumping onto the cot, his arms resting heavily on his thighs. He remained silent, offering no response to his father's plea. Jack had already laid out his escape plan: disappear, evade the authorities. But Calum adamantly refused. He knew that no matter where he went, the shadow of his past would follow, imprisoning him wherever he fled.
"I told you, I'd rather be dead than be out of here," Calum finally said, his voice low and resolute.
Jack shook his head, hands on his hips, his frustration palpable. "What are you doing, Calum? You're a wreck because of that woman? She ruined you? I never knew you were this weak."
A surge of anger ignited in Calum's eyes, a fiery counterpoint to his father's disappointment. "Why wouldn't I be? Didn't it ruin you when you lost Mom?"
Jack froze, his words hanging in the air. Calum pressed on, the dam of his suppressed emotions finally breaking.
"Oh, I get it. You weren't there.So you weren't that affected. I can still remember that night, the night you chose your damn job over us. If you'd been there, maybe, just maybe, she'd still be alive. Mom… she could still be alive right now. If you'd just come home early, eaten dinner with us… maybe you could have protected her. Maybe I wouldn't be like this,acting just like– a piece of shit, broken and useless!"
He punctuated his words by slamming his fists against the steel wall, the sound echoing the raw pain in his heart. Jack, unable to contain his own emotions, watched as the years of grief and regret, previously buried deep, were once again excavated from their resting place. Tears welled in his eyes, rendering him speechless, momentarily stunned by the force of his son's accusations.
"Yes, I'm weak," Calum continued, his voice now laced with a profound sadness that replaced the earlier anger. Tears streamed down his face. "But I'm not a coward. I'm trying everything to protect the woman I love, to protect her happiness, to give her a better life. Even if it means without me, even if it means I'm not the one destined to be with her."
He slumped to the floor, his back against the cold steel bars, the weight of his despair heavy upon him. The silence hung heavy between them for a long moment, broken only by the occasional sob.
Finally, Jack broke the silence, wiping away his tears. "She's not safe while Crow's still breathing, Cal. You can still have her, and I promise you, son, I will clear your name. You will have a better life with her. I owe you so much, and I'm paying for it. I'm paying for it every day that you're so near, yet so far away from me. Forgive me. For not being there, for not being able to save your mother. Forgive me." The words were choked with remorse, a desperate plea for reconciliation from a father consumed by guilt and a desperate desire to make amends with his son.
---
8 days had passed since the trial concluded, and it seemed Mariana had successfully buried the experience deep within her. She hadn't mentioned it to Caitlin once since then; instead, she projected an almost unnervingly cheerful demeanor.
"You're having a dinner date with your soon-to-be husband! Wow! You look absolutely stunning," Caitlin exclaimed, her voice brimming with genuine amazement. Mariana was breathtaking in her sleek black dress, the elegant heels and subtle sparkle of her jewelry complementing the sophisticated French twist that elegantly framed her face. The entire ensemble was perfectly chosen, highlighting her natural beauty.
"He's going to be speechless," Caitlin squealed, her adoration evident. They shared a laugh, a moment of lighthearted camaraderie before the gravity of Mariana's situation threatened to resurface.
Mariana embraced Caitlin warmly before getting into her car. "You can relax and finish watching the From Season 3 finale while I'm gone. You've been waiting for it," she said, her voice betraying none of the turmoil she felt within.
Caitlin chuckled. "Oh yeah, that's exactly what I plan to do."
"Alright, goodbye," Mariana said, a forced lightness in her tone.
"You two have a wonderful dinner, and take care," Caitlin replied, her concern barely masked by her well-wishes.
Mariana offered a bright smile, a carefully constructed façade, before closing the car window and driving away. The moment she was alone, however, the carefully constructed dam holding back her emotions crumbled.
She pulled over to the side of the road, the darkening sky mirroring the growing storm within her. Tears streamed down her face, silent sobs wracking her body. For days, she had successfully maintained the illusion of happiness, shielding Caitlin and Alton from her inner turmoil. She hadn't wanted to burden them with her pain, but the truth was, she couldn't contain it any longer. She missed him. She missed Calum desperately.
The only solace she found was in her dreams, repetitive visions of Calum's deep hazel brown eyes, his infectious laughter echoing in her mind, the image of the dragon tattoo etched on his waist burned into her memory. These recurring dreams only intensified her longing, fueling a yearning she couldn't ignore.
She cried out in frustration, the raw agony of her unrequited love tearing at her. She had accepted the truth – she was hopelessly, irrevocably in love with Calum, a man she could only visit in the realm of dreams. The thought of a future with Alton felt hollow, a cruel mockery of the genuine connection she felt for Calum, a connection that transcended the boundaries of reality. She tried to suppress her feelings, to push them down, but they were like relentless needles, pricking her skin, leaving her emotionally raw.
The uncertainty gnawed at her. Her memories of Calum remained fragmented, elusive, and she desperately hoped they wouldn't return. She needed to forget, to move on, to erase Calum from her life, to eliminate the chaos he had introduced into her world. But the hope felt fragile, a thin thread against the overwhelming tide of her emotions. She was trapped in a cycle of longing, clinging to the remnants of a love that might never be.
***
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