Chương 16: It's So Frustrating!
A new world of anguish opened up for Martin. He tried to come to terms with his thoughts and emotions somehow, but he absolutely couldn't. Going to work had become torture for him, but the thought of quitting made him hurt even more. It wasn't just that bastard Steve who was in the Fergus Stables. Abe Allen was like a real father to Martin and he became close to the younger mechanics as if they were brothers. Even Jack was giving him reassuring smiles and patting him on the shoulder. To leave these great people and this great place only because one night Martin let Steve… No, no and no again! Such stupid one-off incidents have no right to ruin Martin's life! No way, he's not quitting his job!
But the biggest problem was how to fix the relationship with Ami? Even if now, like a stallion, he would fulfilled the girl, wouldn't there be a fear somewhere in her subconscious that something would be wrong with him again? What if Martin didn't satisfy her on the second try and gave her another disappointment?
May all hell consume Paxton and that damned night!
A night that his body could not forget and just remembering ...
Damn it!!!
"I'm worried about you, Martin," Jack said, sitting down with his tray across from the young mechanic. "You can't let it eat you. You have to get it out."
Jack was really good and Martin felt the kindness flowing from him. Martin's eyes were moist, which he tried very carefully to hide.
"Shit," he swore softly, his voice a little shaky. He was angry with himself for having such confused emotions because of this meaningless event.
After his defeat at Ami, he wandered around the city until late at night, and when he returned to his apartment, he could not sleep. He rolled from side to side, cursing Steve, then sighing at memory of his touch. Consequently, he got up in the morning completely exhausted and very irritable. He had no appetite due to stress, so he didn't eat breakfast. He didn't even drink coffee, so his body felt no better than his soul. He was furious with himself.
Hell, he thought, he's a guy after all, and he's acting like some kind of young lady sighing with longing after one night together! But that wasn't what he meant, after all, Martin ... Exactly, what did he really need? What did he want? Why, though he wanted so much to be with Ami, had Steve always appeared in his fantasy?
"I understand this is not a good place to talk," Jack continued, as if he understood the situation. "Let's have a beer today. You know the bar that I always go to with the guys?"
Martin nodded.
"That's good. I'll be there at eight today for you. I do not accept any refusal. You will be there, right?"
Martin sighed heavily.
"I will," he promised.
"Great! Now tell me why do these vegetables always have to be so terribly overcooked? After all, we are not babies who need a special kind of preparation ..."
It was like magic. Jack had to be a magician who could make sorrows disappear like the Statue of Liberty in a magician's shows. His smile was warm and kind, and Martin wondered why he hadn't liked this guy before? At first glance, Jack Lambert was cheerful, self-confident and sympathetic, and only benefited from getting to know him better. No wonder he was considered a wizard who could conjure a way out of any oppression and stayed in the stable for so long.
They finished lunch in a good mood and Martin managed to empty his tray. Together they went back to the booth to work freely while talking.
"I know you're Abe's man, but if you want, you can come over to me," Jack offered with a friendly smile before they entered the stables. "Maybe I'm not a born winner, but maybe it will be easier for you ..."
The offer was very nice, but when Martin thought he might see Steve less often, he felt a rush of panic. Sure, it was hard to stay calm in his presence, but just walk away?
"Eeee… thank you. I really appreciate it, but it won't be necessary. I only have a month left, so ..."
"What? How is it only the month?"
"I only have this job for a break ..." The painful truth stabbed his heart. One month and he will have to leave this place. But maybe it will be better for him? Life alone would deprive him of seeing that bastard Paxton.
"No kidding. And why only for a break?"
"Abe got me this job so that I could train a little, gain experience and have something to write in my CV. The stable is not looking for mechanics."
"But it's pure stupidity to train a man only to fire him out."
"Not for me. Such an internship will allow me to find a really good job in every workshop ..."
Martin did not dare to go on, because Jack's gaze spoke for itself.
"I have to go anyway, or I'll have to explain myself extensively to Abe." Martin decided to back off.
"Sure," said the strangely thoughtful driver. "Just remember, we see each other at eight today."
"Yeah, yeah, I remember," Martin replied, and hurried through the door ... almost hitting Steve.
Martin's heart leapt nervously as he saw the serious face and piercing eyes of the man who confused his life. He was so surprised he couldn't get a word out.
Surprised and angry. This man and his stupid, selfish and uncontrollable behavior spoiled his relationship with Ami.
He made his mind and body strange.
The silence between them was typical. One never seemed to have anything to say to the other. It is true that Martin sometimes wanted to shout this and that, but he lacked the courage. Because what could he say to him in such a situation so as not to sound quite pathetic and stupid?
Ignore him, he thought to himself, pretend you can't see him, otherwise ...
He walked past him without a word, feeling a painful void swirling inside his head. If every meeting with Steve is going to work for him in this way, it's really good that he has only a month left in this job.
Martin's day was painfully dragging on, mainly because Steve was spending a lot of time with his car. Every time Martin saw him with the tip of his eye, it felt absolutely weird. He had already come to terms with what Steve had done to him and even told himself that the driver was treating him this way because he was too drunk to remember what he had done to him, but that didn't change the fact that Steve's handsome face, his the fiery eyes and cool manner made Martin's throat dry.
Finally, the working hours for the mechanics are over. Martin planned to leave work with everyone else, and he even managed to do so, only halfway down the locker room he remembered that he had forgotten his sweatshirt. It was still warm now, but for the evening they forecasted rain. Today he was supposed to go for a beer with Jack, and who knows how long they will be sitting in the bar. So he ran back, asking collogues not to wait for him, and headed for the changing room.
He spotted Steve leaning against the wall in the hallway. The man had his head down, but he picked it up when he heard the footsteps and looked straight at Martin, piercing him with a disturbing look. Steve was strange, gloomy, even dark. Martin slowed his pace, afraid to approach the man when the third eyes were not looking at them. For a moment he even wanted to turn back, but that would mean he was chickened out, and he couldn't. He had to face him, if only that way.
The closer he got to Steve, the more he could sense his subtle scent - a combination of masculinity, race track and class all by itself.
Suddenly, the sonorous stability of the silence was torn apart by motion and sound.
"Come with me."
Steve firmly grasped Martin's wrist and pulled.
"Hey, let me go! What the hell are you thinking?"
The driver wasn't listening. When Martin tried to resist, he only pulled harder, not recognizing the objection. He led him through the corridor and the cloakroom. They only stopped in the corridor between the pit and the drivers' section. Steve pinned Martin to the wall, restricting his freedom of movement. Before Martin could react, his lips were already crushed by Steve's kiss.
Martin definitely did not expect such a turn of events.
What a fool, thought red with anger. Like at the hotel he tried to break free from Steve's arms, and at the hotel he was completely powerless.
Only it was even worse now. Not only did the man pin him to the wall, but Martin's treacherous body knew the sweetness of this caress and began to demand it.
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