Chương 216: 1
The twelfth bowl of dog food: durian-flavored Ares attack
Gou Liang's body was in so much pain that he wanted to end his life with a knife, but he didn't let the System block his pain.
Because –
Damn, even if this son of a bitch's soul is frozen, I will torture his body even if I can't torture his heart! No, after torturing his body, I will sleep with my husband a hundred times, a hundred times. Even if he dies, I will f * cking kill him again!
If Gou Liang, who had turned into a roaring body in the sea of consciousness, could find the place where the original owner's body was hidden – where the soul was frozen, he would definitely rush over and beat him alive!
"Master, master, calm down, calm down!"
The System retreated a hundred steps and looked at Gou Liang, who was angrily walking around and scratching his head. It was so scared that it hugged itself tightly.
The guy who made Gou Liang so angry that his hair was about to stand up was none other than his host in this world.
The original owner's name was Wei Xuanming, Chang Ning, and he was twenty-four years old.
Now, he was using the alias Chang Xuanning – looking at this pieced together name, it was obvious that he was not only bad at naming names, but also an idiot – joining the army. Relying on the wisdom of the ancient people from his motherland for five thousand years and his own cleverness, as well as his sinister, cunning, vicious, merciless, and inhumane style of fighting to the death, in his fifth year in the army, he fought his way up to the position of a fifth rank lieutenant from an unknown soldier without any background.
No matter how much of his personal feelings were in this evaluation, there was one point that was beyond doubt.
The original owner ate dog shit luck and stepped on the chaotic evil wind in the Soul Recycling Station of the Space Administration, and crossed over from a C-level world called Earth to this place.
In the twenty-first century, Wei Xuanming stood at the peak of life and looked down on all living things. He pretended to be a dog in front of people and a dog in behind people. He only liked to play with girls.
His hard drive was filled with hundreds of T of thin-skinned male idols, which fully exposed the burning desire in this fellow's heart. Not only did he specifically pick out gays for his pajamas, he also liked to use female characters to flirt with gays when playing games. Moreover, he specifically picked out burly men with eight-pack abs and long legs. Oh, this person claimed that he was the top. His ideal type was a burly man with broad shoulders, a thin waist, and a perky butt.
Gou Liang also didn't care about the fact that he was a 170cm tall gigolo who had such a deep misunderstanding of him. He also didn't care about the fact that he was a virgin in both of his lifetimes — such a tragic life that could shock the heavens and make ghosts weep. But damn it, this idiot actually had his eyes on his husband's butt in this lifetime!
This was truly unbearable!
That's right. After Idiot Wei transmigrated to this era where there was no Wifi, Little Pink, or Mr. Perfect, he quickly picked up his broken glass heart and glued it back together. He crazily set his sights on the ancient humans who were simple on the outside but simple on the inside.
He believed that in his previous life, he was destined to be alone because he suffered a loss from the professional scum who had a refined appearance. Therefore, in this life, he was determined to become a muscular male martial arts master.
Adhering to the belief that heroes should be grasped from a child, Wei XuanMing threw a tantrum and acted coquettishly and cutely. Unexpectedly, Prime Minister Wei, who had been a scholar for generations, put down his pride and invited a dozen martial arts masters to teach him. Later, he even shook hands with his old rival and made peace with him, making his young grandson the last disciple of that old man Xiahou.
The original owner studied hard and finally had some small achievements. When he was ten years old, he was unwilling to be left out and wrote an eternal masterpiece at a poetry gathering. This made Prime Minister Wei, who had hurt himself and had no successor, overjoyed.
From then on, Grandpa Wei had high hopes for his young grandson. He grasped both literary and martial arts skills.
After being tortured for eight years, the original owner struggled in Prime Minister Wei's sea of tears for two days before admitting defeat and entering the examination hall. This pretentious fellow also had the spirit of "other than first, there is no other result in my dictionary". As expected, he brought back a top scholar for Prime Minister Wei.
This delighted the entire Wei Family.
Originally, Wei XuanMing and his grandfather had made a pact. As long as he became the top scholar, his marriage and future would be decided by himself. Unexpectedly, he, who was so handsome that he could break the universe, couldn't control his hormones. At the Qionglin Banquet, he accidentally captivated the little princess of Shuyang Marquessate Mansion. The latter directly begged His Majesty the Emperor and asked him to be the matchmaker.
Wei XuanMing, who had wholeheartedly dreamed of having strong muscles for two lifetimes, withstood the attack of his grandfather's tears this time. In order to escape this arranged marriage, before the Emperor's order became reality, he directly left a letter and wandered the world.
In fact, the original owner had already made plans for his future. He wandered around the dazzling capital and found that it was full of vulgar women. He wholeheartedly wanted to borrow his master General Xiahou's connections to join the army and serve the country. Cough, cough, while he was at it, he also wanted to kidnap a loyal and strong man back home.
Therefore, when he left, he took the fake birthplace that he had prepared to serve in the military in case anything went wrong.
He joined the Shuyang Army stationed in the Northwest Great Desert City — — this was not a good choice.
Although the marriage between the two manors wasn't made public, he didn't need to think to know that his refusal to marry and escape from home would cause irresponsible remarks from those bored scholars in the capital. No matter how many versions of the cause and effect they fabricated, he had already formed a grudge with the Shuyang Marquessate Mansion. Once his identity was discovered, what awaited him was definitely not a good outcome.
It had to be known that the little princess that he had 'tactfully rejected' was the precious daughter of the Shuyang Marquessate Mansion. Everyone knew that the rarer something was, the more valuable it was. Moreover, her seven older brothers not only protected her, but also liked to use violence to solve problems.
However, he had no choice but to enter the wolf's den even if he wanted to.
In the Tianyang Imperial Army, other than the Shuyang Army, only Xiahou had enough military experience. He was a good man, so even if he wanted to escape from home, he still wanted to make a name for himself and return home in glory. If he wanted to use his fists and feet to obtain more opportunities for promotion, it had to be Shuyang or Xiahou.
Compared to the Xiahou Army, who could see through his wishful thinking, the original owner of the body didn't need to think too much about choosing the Shuyang Army.
After that … …
On the first day he entered the army, he fell in love at first sight.
It was an afternoon when the sun was setting. The sand in the desert was kicked up by the horse's hooves. In that magnificent yellow background, a general in full armor rode a horse towards him.
He was like a hero that had traveled through time to come from afar, stepping on seven colored clouds to marry — — to marry him. That beautiful face made all things in the world lose their color. Wei Xuanming's line of sight became narrower and quieter. All that was left was the person that had barged into his life like a hot knife through butter.
From then on, one glance was enough to ruin his entire life — — what the hell!
Pretending to be an artistic youth for eight hundred lifetimes, this Yan Gou was simply lustful!
Gou Liang watched him chase after his wife for the next six years. He hated that he couldn't kill his way into the soul body mirror and tear apart Wei Xuanming's stupid face. Daring to covet his husband was simply too tired of dying.
However, Wei Yan Gou was a person that dared to court death.
In order to be the first to enjoy the moonlight, he didn't hide at all in the first year and did his best to climb up. On the battlefield, he was always at the front, actively providing strategies for his superiors behind the scenes. It could be said that he was in the limelight. After a few battles, the original owner didn't disappoint and bravely obtained the title of Ten Thousand Slayer. Stepping on the footsteps of a general that built his success on ten thousand bones, he quickly went from a small soldier without a rank to a secondary eighth rank official that controlled thousands of soldiers. He openly stood in front of the heir of the Shuyang Marquessate Mansion — — Han Zhan.
It was at a celebratory banquet.
The Shuyang Army had won a great victory over the Western Mang and even cut down one of the other side's great generals. It was truly satisfying. The plan to subdue the enemy was provided by the original owner. He could be said to have contributed greatly, so he was allowed into the commander's tent.
Only, no one would have thought that when General Han asked him what he wanted as a reward, this fellow would raise his broken wine bowl and recite a poem in front of everyone.
The original line was like this:
There is a beauty that I can't forget when I see her.
Not seeing her for a day, I miss her like crazy.
Wei Yan Gou swallowed down his courage and fearlessly clapped his hands in front of Han Zhan, praising him with a bright smile, "I didn't know Xuanning had this kind of literary talent before!" When he spoke, his eyes locked onto him and he said in an infatuated manner, "General, this subordinate doesn't ask for anything other than a chance to take care of you. I, Chang Xuanning, swear that I will be loyal to you for the rest of my life. I will follow you in life and death. "
Before the soldiers in the tent could react, Han Zhan stopped laughing.
He quickly recovered from his shock and his expression gradually became cold. He gave Wei Xuanming a chance to take back his words, "Division Chief Chang, what do you mean by this?"
Wei Xuanming didn't seem to notice the warning in his tone. He raised his head and drank the wine in his bowl. He wiped his mouth and stared at him with a burning gaze before throwing the bowl down in a domineering manner.
Everyone looked over in shock and saw Wei Xuanming pointing three fingers at the sky as he loudly said, "The heavens above, the earth below, and all my comrades are my, Chang Xuanning's, witnesses! If there is a single lie in what I say today, then let me be struck by lightning and die a horrible death. Listen! Han Zhan, I like you! This father likes you, this father wants to take you as my wife! "
Every word was powerful and the commander's tent fell silent.
These soldiers who had seen blood on the battlefield were easily scared silly by these words.
After a long time, his immediate superior, General Lin Di, gave a dry laugh to smooth things over, "Ha, ha, ha, Little Chang is drunk. Ha, ha, this brat likes to talk nonsense when he's drunk. Ha, it can't be taken seriously."
Wei Xuanming didn't appreciate it. He straightened his neck and shouted at Han Zhan, "I'm not drunk. Han Zhan, be good to me! I will definitely love you and dote on you. I will give you my heart. I really like you. I think of you even in my dreams … "
"Division Chief Chang is drunk. Send him back to rest."
Han Zhan said lightly. He finally couldn't listen to it anymore.
However, the fact that his favorability had dropped from 70 to 22 was enough to show that his heart wasn't calm.
He originally thought that no matter what Wei Xuanming thought of him, with his intelligence, he would know his place and not cause trouble in the future.
He didn't expect Wei Xuanming to not play by the rules at all. Not only did he not act as if nothing had happened, but he was also afraid that too few people knew about his feelings, so he openly launched a fierce attack on him.
Reciting love poems was common, but he didn't listen. Instead, he wrote poems on the ground in front of the tent for him to see. In addition, Wei Xuanming had sent him red desert foxes, wild geese, and lit torches. It could be said that Wei Xuanming used all kinds of methods to please him. However, how did Wei Xuanming know that he liked this kind of thing that was used to coax girls?
Lin Di advised him, "Little Chang, the general doesn't have a lover. Even if he likes this kind of thing, his eyesight isn't bad. You should give up. "
His words were tactful, but the soldiers outside who were laughing at him didn't hold back.
"That Chang Xuanning doesn't even look at himself. He actually dares to have designs on the general. Don't you know that a horse doesn't know the face of a fly and doesn't know the smell of feces?
"Division Chief Chang, if you really want to be with the general, why don't you go back to your mother's womb and be reborn?"
"With your appearance … Tsk tsk, brother, although I am close to you, I can't go against my conscience and push the general into a fire pit."
Wei Xuanming used his own experience to prove that when the number one young master of the capital, who was more handsome than Pan An, had a beard and a bean-sized mole, even if he had a pair of adorable dimples on his cheeks when he smiled, it was of no use.
In this era where looks were important, it was just that simple and crude.
Although Gou Liang didn't want to admit it, the original owner's appearance was just as the system had said. They were eighty percent similar, especially the misty and lazy peach blossom eyes and the moderately thin smiling lips. It was just that the dimples on his cheeks became two eye-catching dimples. When he smiled, they appeared. It added a touch of naivety to the indifferent expression that seemed to be able to see through the fickleness of the world.
But even if he was facing his own face, Gou Liang could still be ruthless when faced with this kind of person who was seeking death.
What he couldn't tolerate the most was not Wei Xuanming shamelessly using the opportunity to show his existence in front of Han Zhan, but him playing cotton in front of his husband.
In the 21st century, this guy could be considered a talented, rich, and handsome man. When he was in school, he prepared a set of skills to flirt with men, one of which was playing the guitar.
He spent a large amount of money to hire a carpenter to make a guitar. His feelings poured out through the decadent sound. He sang, "Falling in love with you is my fault", "I admit that it's all the moon's fault", "You're so beautiful, beautiful beautiful beautiful ~", his voice was full of emotion and tender feelings.
However, with such a beautiful voice, it was as if he …
Gou Liang was angry: Fuck, did you pay the copyright fee?!
That night, the guitar was secretly sunk in the lake by an unknown warrior of the Huyang Army who couldn't sleep. When the carpenters at the border saw him, they all swore to protect their chastity and shouted, "Spare this slave, my lord."
This kind of life lasted for two years. Wei Xuanming's military achievements became higher and higher, and his rank also rose steadily. He was promoted from an eighth-rank director to a seventh-rank captain. Han Zhan, who always kept a clear distinction between public and private affairs, had treated him coldly until this day.
Idiot Wei stole General Han's underwear, and it was no surprise that he was exposed.
Han Zhan wanted to make him retreat, so he didn't show any mercy. Wei Xuanming, who claimed to be the best martial artist in the world, was forced to use all his skills, and the battle was very exciting. Then, as the saying goes, "As the saying goes, as the saying goes, as the saying goes, the devil is ten." In the end, Wei Xuanming, who was pretending to be cool and pretentious, was beaten until half of his body was paralyzed. He lay on the ground, unable to get up.
General Han pulled the corner of his sleeve and looked down at him. "I hope Director Chang can take this as a warning and be careful with your words and actions."
Wei Xuanming, who was trembling in pain, only asked him, "Did you have fun?"
Han Zhan didn't answer, but it was obvious that this lesson made him feel quite happy.
Wei Xuanming said, "As long as you're happy. If it's not enough, you can come at me again one day. You can beat me however you want. Hehe, beating is a sign of affection and scolding is a sign of love. Han Zhan, the more you beat me, the more I like it. "
Han Zhan froze in place. After a moment, he waved his robe and left.
Wei Xuanming was still shouting behind him, "You're welcome to come again next time! Whether it's daytime or the middle of the night, my body will always be open for you! "
Han Zhan said, "… Director Chang is not sick or in pain. You don't have to bother to find a doctor for him."
This sentence made Wei Xuanming feel pain for two whole months.
Gou Liang, on the other hand, felt that the pain wasn't enough. He really wanted to jump into his soul and step on this guy.
After a long time, whether it was the people of the Shuyang Army or the annoyed Han Zhan, they had all become accustomed to Wei Xuanming's perseverance and madness, and were unmoved.
No matter how optimistic Wei Xiao Qiang was, it was inevitable that he would be frustrated. However, he was determined to go all the way and was bound to fight to the death with Han Zhan.
That was until three months ago.
Han Zhan received a birthday gift from a 26-year-old girl from the capital — — a beauty.
The Emperor bestowed it, the Marquise of Shuyang arranged it, and the rich and powerful sent it. There were a total of 20 people, of all shapes and sizes.
Wei Xuanming went to take a look and commented, saying that there was no need to be afraid of ordinary women. However, he didn't expect that his actions would make General Han, who originally didn't even bother to look, order the beauty to be sent into the tent.
That night, Wei Xuanming held a wine pot and sang to the moon. His voice, supported by his internal energy, resounded throughout the entire military camp.
"I want to ask you if you dare to go crazy for love like me."
"Dinner for three people, no matter how much I eat, I can't finish it."
"My heart is so cold, waiting for you to hurt me."
Those who wanted to stop him were defeated by his martial strength. The deputy general went to ask General Han for help. The latter ground an ink stick and wrote, and sent him away with a light sentence, "After singing tonight, he won't be able to make a sound for three months. Let him be."
However, on the second night, Director-General Wei's concert was still going on. On the fourth night, he finally lost his voice, but he still didn't give up and began to play cotton.
When the divine weapon was brought out, the soldiers were scared out of their wits.
However, they didn't expect that without Wei Xuanming's accompaniment, although the tune was strange, it was still pleasing to the ear. Thus, no one cared about him.
However, he stubbornly played until his ten fingers were dripping with blood, and he didn't stop.
When Han Zhan heard the deputy general's report, his hand holding the brush slightly paused. He sighed and said, "Arrange for the soldiers to get married as soon as possible. Don't waste the beauty."
"Yes."
The deputy general felt as if he had been pardoned.
Wei Xuanming was happy for a long time because he thought that this was the beginning of Han Zhan's softening attitude. He was finally one step closer to success.
Gou Liang sneered. 22 points of favorability hadn't increased in five years. This was the real idiot!
However, the idiot Wei didn't have this opportunity.
Five years ago, Western Mang, whose general had died, made a comeback this year. The one leading the troops was the general's son, and he came aggressively to take revenge for his father. The war was fierce, and Zan-Bu's methods were even more sinister than his father's. It was impossible to guard against sneak attacks.
A few days ago, Wei Xuanming blocked a sneak attack from our army for Han Zhan. It was smeared with poison and hit right in the heart.
"Han Zhan … have I, have I ever told you that in this life, I met you. Only then did I know that the heavens … have treated me well. It's, it's worth it …"
His bloodthirsty smile finally moved Han Zhan.
However, Gou Liang glanced at the favorability and only gave him a cold snort.
Name: Han Zhan, Courtesy Name: Nine Heavens
Gender: Male
Age: 26
Height: 193cm
Appearance Coefficient: ★ ★ ★ ★ ★
Intelligence Coefficient: ★ ★ ★ ★ ★
Physical Coefficient: ★ ★ ★ ★ ★
Health Coefficient: ★ ★ ★ ★ ★
Potential: S Rank
Current Favorability: 60
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