Chương 1931: 161
Chapter 161
Notes:
I said this yesterday but I closed off Guest Comments. So, apologies for that, but there was a total creepazoid sending some really unwelcome comments as a guest and I really hope they never bother one of my fics again. Ruby34, you know who you are. Fuck off and never harass my comment section again.
Chapter Text
"I can't fucking believe Pennster managed to pull off a fucking Shining Finger ," Mercury grumbled as he dashed forward and kicked a guy in the face- one of the members of Team CNTN (Carnation) but he couldn't be assed to remember who it was when literally every member of the team was decked out in flower decals and bright red outfits. Honestly, if they weren't such losers, he would have thought they were part of Ruby's fanclub or something. "How the fuck are we supposed to follow that up without pulling some spectacular bullshit with Cinder and Neo's stupid fuckery?"
"I don't think we can , especially when the whole thing was more stupid than it was awesome," Emerald pointed out, dashing around Mercury and using her Kama to trip up a different member of Team CNTN and fling them away. Honestly, it was kinda unfair just how uneven the matchup was here- CNTN was not a team with high combat scores, nor did they have high odds of winning the tournament, nor did they have particularly interesting weapons, nor did they have anything particularly special that would let them pull out a win.
They might end up being half decent Huntsmen, but uh… they weren't good enough to face off against Team CMNE. Not in the slightest. They'd sure show Team CNTN who had the superior shade of red. Or… something. Despite the fact that no one in Team CMNE even had red as their primary color of choice.
"Yeah, but I thought it was fucking hilarious when she just punched the dude in the chest," Mercury protested, both he and Emerald fighting in perfect sync as he shot low and she shot high and they fought back to back and Emerald made the two they were fighting hallucinate and feel as though the both of them were standing in slightly different places than they actually were- only by a few inches, but it'd really, throw off their attacks. "Also, like, c'mon! It was Shining Finger! She and Rubes have been working on that shit ever since they binged all of G-Guntan the other week! Give 'em props for that, plus Penny had to modify her own shit to pull it off at all!"
"No one's saying that they didn't put in effort, I'm just saying that they probably should have paid more attention to actually combating enemy teams instead of just replicating moves from a giant mecha anime! Like, couldn't Ruby have learned or figured out something that was actually more effective than replicating the Burning Finger?" Emerald shot back, then turned her attention to where Cinder and Neo were fighting completely flawlessly with each other, almost turning it into a dance as they fought their half of Team CNTN without any problems whatsoever. She would have been jealous, but she knew that when she was with either of her girlfriends, all three of them were nigh unstoppable- the combination of hallucinations, solid illusions, and Cinder's raw power combining into something akin to stepping out into the dark and getting hit by a truck. Except the truck was also on fire. "I mean, okay, I know we drilled out moves from anime too but like, we did that when there wasn't a tournament going on!"
"Meh. It's Rubester and Pennby, they're like the two most unstoppable people we know. Let 'em have fun while they're still kids, Ems!" Mercury snickered as he artfully did a backflip to avoid a Dust laser, firing a pair of shots in response and starting to dance because he felt like it, going so far as to do dance emotes from his favorite FPS game once he'd actually knocked down one of the members of Team CNTN. "Ha! Suck it! Woo!"
"Someone's gonna shoot you in the balls for that one of these days," Emerald grumbled, aiming one of her guns directly at Mercury's crotch and glaring at him for daring to interrupt the sanctity of a fight with his stupid dance moves. "And it's probably going to be me. Gods I hope it's me."
"Do it, pussy," Mercury shot back with a smirk, backflipping out of the way of Emerald's immediate shot and giving her a wink. "Gotta try harder than that , dyke!"
"Blow me, f-"
Emerald paused, then looked around for a moment. "... Wait shit how sensitive are the microphones on this stage?"
"I dunno, but I'm pretty sure those boos are for me right now," Mercury pointed out, clearing his throat as they realized they were, in fact, still in the middle of a fight and also that Emerald's opponent had just been standing there for a hot moment just watching them argue. "Which is stupid, because you literally call yourself a dyke all the time!"
"I do not!" Emerald scoffed, crossing her arms, firing a shot dead center at her opponent's forehead and knocking her out of the match entirely. "I only call myself a dyke when I… uh… refer to myself… in the context… of being Cinder and Neo's girlfriend."
"Uh huh. And how often do you just mutter 'oh god I'm such a dyke for them', you dumbass?" Mercury deadpanned.
"... Fuck. Shit. About as much as you call yourself a fag whenever Yatsu sends you a topless selfie," Emerald groaned, sinking to her knees in the realization that she probably said the word dyke way too much.
"Excuse you, I don't call myself a fag, I call myself a pure, one hundred percent, flamingly homosexual, faggot!" Mercury shot back, shouting out that last word with a great big middle finger to the crowds, who sort of didn't know how to react anymore.
"Will you two flaming homos shut up and help us finish the match already!?" Cinder shouted from across the stage, motioning vaguely at the two remaining members of Team CNTN, who looked much worse for wear- oh, wait no, one of them had just taken a shot to the ass from Neo while they were distracted. "Seriously, this is our first match of the day! Emerald I know you like bantering with Mercury but come on can you do your civic duty as my and Neo's girlfriend and help us jump this guy already!?"
"Actually I'm a girl," the last remaining member of Team CNTN pointed out, clearing her throat as she spoke up for the first time during the entire match. Cinder thought her name was Crimzon Carnation, which was… a surprisingly gender neutral name, all things considered. No wonder Cinder had mistaken her for a guy during the entire fight leading up to now. Especially when she was wearing thick, bulky snow jacket that covered everything from her nose to her knees. "I know I'm pretty androgynous but I figured I should point that out before you jump my ass."
"... Oh, sorry."
"It's okay, I know it's hard for people to tell," Crimzon shrugged, then cleared her throat. "So uh… it's not too late to surrender or something, right?"
"... I mean, I think you're allowed to surrender?" Cinder blinked slowly, then looked vaguely up at the announcer's booth. "She's allowed to do that, right? I kinda feel bad for ganging up on her."
Professor Port sighed, pinching his brow. "Yes, Miss Fall, teams are allowed to forfeit the moment they feel it necessary. If that is what Miss Carnation wants?"
"... Yeah, I don't wanna get jumped by four people that made my entire team look like idiots," Crimzon nodded, then dropped her weapon and held both hands up. "I surrender!"
And with that, Team CMNE's match ended with a… remarkably anticlimactic finale.
"... Well. Cool. I'm gonna go change and get out of this stupid coat," Crimzon grumbled, picking up her variable shotgun sword and sheathing it on her back as she started walking over to pick up her half conscious teammates. "Stupid winter weather… hate Vale so much, Vacuo is so much nicer… it's not fucking cold half the time… hate this stupid place I'd rather get sand in my ass crack than have to deal with slipping on ice every other day… least it's not Atlas."
"Yeah… sorry about that," Cinder cleared her throat awkwardly and watched the second year student start walking away. "Bad luck and all, coming up against us."
"Mhmm… least it wasn't those nightmares in Team RWBYP, at least I get some pride in walking off the stage on my own…"
"... So are we gonna keep arguing about reclaiming slurs or…?" Mercury asked, raising his hand slowly as he turned to face the rest of his team. His answer was received in the form of Neo walking up behind him and kneeing him right in the balls. "FUCKING-"
"I think we should just go back to the locker rooms and take our break," Emerald pointed out, watching Mercury roll around on the ground and groan pathetically as he tried to relieve the sudden pain in his poor testicles. "I mean, not that we really did much? Team CNTN was… not a good matchup for us."
"Yeah, but we shouldn't be rude about it," Cinder huffed, crossing her arms as she strode over and gently bumped her shoulder against Emerald's. "They did their best."
"Yeah, and they still got so distracted that I could shoot one of 'em cuz they were just standing there."
"... They'll get better with time, probably."
"Hopefully."
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