ALESSIA
Well that went well. Jaxson got pissed at me and stormed out. I heard the front door slam. I was surprised that he left. Usually I am the one telling him that its time to leave, he is always dragging his feet looking for something to do to stay longer.
I can honestly say that I have not really given us a chance to get close. I have always kept him at arm's length. Could I get over being his second choice? We have never really had a normal conversation. Most things I know about him are from others.
When he took me to my doctor's appointments and we passed by his pack members, they would always greet him with a smile. Some would laugh and joke with him while others were more reserved but never in a fearful way. I have seen many people walk up to him because they needed his help or his opinion. The kids loved him. Many times, I would see him outside playing football with the boys or help the girls out when the boys were picking on them. I can tell that he is going to be a great father.
Micah on the other hand is also attractive and we really enjoy talking to each other. I have come to know him. After we started talking again after the incident in the park, we talk about everything and anything. There is so much I know about him and vice versa. If it had not been for his keeping things from me about Becca, we would probably be together right now. He may not have worked along side of Becca and teamed up to keep Jaxson and me apart but with him remaining silent, he caused me a world of hurt.
Not to mention, Becca is there on his territory with his child. She wants another chance with him, and I believe he is holding out answering her because he is waiting to see what I choose to do. I know he wants a relationship with me. He said he does not care about me having Jaxson's babies. He would never stand in the way of them having a relationship with each other. He brought it up once and I told him, I didn't want to talk about it so he hasn't said anything.
I am so confused. The one thing I need to do is allow a friendship between Jaxson and me, to see how things. I need to give him the same opportunities that I am giving Micah. A friendship, nothing more. At least for right now.
Suddenly the door burst open, Jaxson walked in and came straight towards me. He sat down besides me. Before I could ask him what he was doing, his lips came crashing against mine. I froze in shock. I did not expect that. He kissed me hard and aggressive. His tongue was in my mouth, exploring all of it. He circled his tongue around mine. It felt so good. I kissed him back, my arms went around his neck holding him closer to me. I am doing exactly what I said I was not going to do.
We were both desperate for air. He pulled away but started kissing my jawline down to my neck. I'm moaning like hell. When he got to the spot, he's supposed to mark me, he sucked it, I guarantee he left a huge hickey.
Then he pulled away. I was out of breath and not focused on anything, I already missed his lips on my body. He got up and walked to the door. I'm stunned. Why is he leaving?
I stopped him. I apologize for my behavior and I asked him to stay and talk to me. Regardless if we end up together or not, we are going to be parents of 2 children. We need to be able to get along for the sake of them. I do not want my kids growing up watching their parents fight and have tension every time we are together.
We sat there in my bed talking for hours. He asked me a question, I answered and then I asked him one. We talked about our parents how what is was like growing up, things we liked and disliked. I told him after the babies are born, I wanted us to visit my parents in New York. My parents may not know or ever understand the whole werewolf thing, but they are still their grandparents. I do not want them being left out.
"Will you tell me about Alena's father?" he asked. I tenses up slightly because I have not talked about him in a long time.
"I met him in school. We started off as friends but one day, he asked me out on a date. Quickly after that, things got serious. We were always together. My favorite part was how well Jessica and Jonathan got along so well. I never felt like I was leaving one out for the other. I loved him a lot and I miss him. I hate how Alena will never get to know him because he was a great man and he would have been so happy to be a father." I said.
"How did he die?"
"It was a car accident. We went out to celebrate our anniversary. We ran into his parents and siblings. It was obvious they knew nothing about me because they were shocked to see him with me. Before he left for school, he was in a relationship with someone else. They broke up because they both attended different schools but agreed after graduating, they would get back together and get married. One of those things, you get to explore the world before coming home to settle down. He did not stick to the plan and started a relationship with me. They were not happy about it. You see, his parents and the parents of his ex, were extremely high up in their social and financial world, merging both families, would have made them extremely powerful. They insisted that he end things with me. He refused but I still got upset and we left. During the ride home, is when the accident happened." I said.
"Well all I can say is, if my parents were alive, they would have loved you. They never would have asked me to leave you and they probably would have kicked my ass for what I did to you. Honestly, I would have never done that because I feared my mother way too much to piss her off. She was not a fan of Becca and would have sensed that you were my mate right away. Things would have been completely different." He said.
"Let's change the subject, I'm tired of talking about it. It only brings up bad memories and we are not here for that right now." I said. I just wanted to forget that part of history for a little while.
"What do you want to name our children?" he asked. I stared at him wide eyed. It was embarrassing because with everything going on, I have not thought about it.
"Do you have any names in mind" I asked. We sat there talking about names. Some of the ones he came up with were horrible. I would feel so sorry for my kids. I am going to have to pick a list of names and let him choose his favorite from that list. I am sorry, I cannot let him traumatize our kids.
Not even realizing it, I dozed off. I was exhausted.
Waking up the next morning, I felt pressure across my stomach. I reached down and felt an arm going around me. I looked over and saw Jaxson sound asleep next to me. His shirt was off. Is he trying to kill me? Does he realize what kind of hormones a pregnant woman has? Making sure I do not wake him up, I carefully looked at all the tattoos he had across his arms and chest. They were everywhere.
Getting caught up in the moment, I did not realize that he woke up. "Are you enjoying exploring my body?" he asked with a smirk. My eyes got big, my mouth dropped, and I felt my face get red. All I could do is drop my head. I could not say anything. He jumped up out of bed, dropped his pants, leaving only his boxers on and jumped back in bed. I could not figure out what he was doing?
"Explore all you want." He said with a big ass smile on his face. He spread his arms out so he is laying there looking like a star fish. I didn't know what to do? Yes, I have had sex with this man many ways on many different surfaces but right now, I was nervous.
He must have noticed I was uncomfortable so he randomly pointed at a tattoo and told me what it meant to him and when he got it. I started to relax as I was listening to him, I began picking the tattoo I wanted him to explain. Then he suddenly stopped.
"Wait, how many tattoos do you have? He asked.
"I have 4. There is big tattoo on my back behind my left shoulder blade of a dream catcher with roses, in small letters is Jonathan's and Alena's name in it. There is the one that is going down my side of vines with roses. My left wrist says believe and my right wrist says stay strong." I said. He looked at me with this evil smile. It kind of scared me, I did not know what he was thinking.
"I want to see." He said.
"No, I'm not taking off my shirt."
"Please. Come on, we have had sex before, but I was preoccupied." He said. You can tell he was thinking about just that. I slapped his arm and told him to stop.
"Fine but no touching." I sat up and took my shirt off. Looking at him over my shoulder. I do not exactly trust him right now. Given our history, the last time I was caught without a shirt on, it did not end so well.
When I felt he had enough time to look at them, I laid back on the bed. My babies must have woken up because they started kicking me. You could see the movements from outside my stomach. Jaxson was watching them. He lifted his hand, he hesitated to put it on my stomach. Seeing if I would object, I nodded my head. He laid his hand right on top of where they were kicking. He had a huge smile on his face. We sat there for a while before I could not take it anymore. They were hungry and upset that I was making them wait.