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23.12% Dragonborn Saga / Chapter 172: Jon vs The Kardashians! (cuz why not?)

Chương 172: Jon vs The Kardashians! (cuz why not?)

"This is against the rules... No one said anything about a bloody T-Rex."

*ROOAOAOAOAAAR!*

I just saw a very unpleasant thing, apart from the tens of the Kagoutis that appeared after I recklessly electrocuted the water, a very big Kagouti with red scales and glowing eyes came from one tunnel and roared at me.

The large kagouti was almost five meters big which is two times larger than the average kagouti, one can compare it to a T-Rex because of the size if its mean looking head and its sharp fangs and big tusks.

"Alexa! What is that?"

---------------------------

Race: Bull Kagouti

Estimated States:-

Level: 50

HP: 880

SP: 632

MP: 40

Weakness: Lightning

---------------------------

"Fuck you! I am out of here!"

The best option right now is to run.

I turned around and just like that… I started running with my all.

What about the chest in the wall you ask? Well… I think my life is more important right now.

Even though I was surrounded, it was easy to break free with my speed.

The idea of facing all that number myself is not that appealing at the moment.

I picked a tunnel that seemed to be empty and started running… of course, my new kagouti friends wouldn't want to part from me too soon and started giving a chase.

*KWAAAR*

*ROAR*

*FAAAA*

The damn things made all kinds of noise when they ran, the scariest thing was the Bull Kagouti that broke all the lines and started chasing me ahead of its pack vigorously.

"Go away!"

*ROAOAOAAR*

"No, I am not food you dumb idiot!*

*ROAAAAR*

"I said not food dammit... Fine! Take this!"

The Bull Kagouti was drooling and roaring while it was running and annoyed Oblivion out of me, the only way to retaliate to it is by laying traps. And what better trap than the 'Lightning Rune'?

I started carpeting the way behind me with a lot of 'Lightning Rune' marks appeared with a glow behind me. Once the Bull Kagouti stepped on one of them, Lightning exploded from the rune with a strong sound… but it was still okay and not even scratched.

"Damn! What is wrong with that thing?"

I only had to run and spam runes everywhere from this point on. Luckily, the other Kagoutis weren't as resilient as the big one so they got affected by the magic.

It wasn't much longer until I started running out of escape routes and really was considering using the scroll that teleports me out of the dungeon but I would be very ashamed if something like that happened.

It was then when the System gave me a thin glimpse of hope…

<Analysis detected a weakness!>

"Fuck yeah! Show me show me show me!"

<All Kagouti creatures possess a bad eyesight especially in dark spaces, they mostly rely on their keen hearing sense and their ability of vocal communication!>

"... bad eyesight? A keen sense of hearing… I see…"

With that in mind, I think I can already deal with whatever that is!

***

Jon was running out options but it was time to get serious.

"Alexa, play me some music!"Jon gave the order as he started casting 'Magestereo' orbs all over the place and it was all linked to the System.

<Confirmed!>

♪Bitch Lasagna - Pewdiepie♪

"Hell yeah! Let's jump into this!"

The Magestereo orbs started playing the song as hard as it could and Jon observed the changes happening in the surroundings… sure enough, the Kagoutis started running into the walls.

Jon laughed and cast 'Muffle' on himself then started going the other way but he suddenly saw two glowing red eyes glaring at him…

"Eh, Alexa! That last thing you discovered, is it applied on the Bull Kagouti too?"

<Negative!>

"Fuck you!"

*ROOAAAAR!*

"NOT YOU… shit!"

The Bull Kagouti seemed to have no problems with it eyesight, Jon realized the fact but the Bull Kagouti started attacking.

*Swoosh* *Chomp*

The Bull Kagouti attacked Jon with a swing of its large tusks and then tried to bite Jon who evaded skillfully.

Jon managed to jump away and released his Aura and cast 'Energize' and 'Hasten' on himself, his speed reached its peak and the true clash between the Bull Kagouti and Jon began.

Jon chose to widen the battle area to fight with ease but the tunnel he was in was filled with Kagoutis that were chasing the Stereo Orbs. Jon thought of something funny and manipulated the orbs towards the Bull Kagouti.

The orbs wouldn't work against such a creature but when it was about to charge at Jon, what faced its charge was its kin. The other Kagoutis mindlessly charged at the Bull Kagouti and blocked its charge completely resulting a massive traffic jam in the tunnel.

"Sorry, mate! Next time, don't bring your kids to a fight."

Jon was in a good mood and kicked a Kagouti that was lying on the ground towards the Bull Kagouti that was standing up.

With no mercy towards its kin, the Bull Kagouti received the flying kagouti with its head and bashed it away.

"Bastard! That was Sally, your niece!"

*ROOAAAAR!"

"You evil bastard! Don't disown your family members that fast… Here, take those three. Kim, Khloe and Kourtney!"

Jon kicked three more Kagoutis towards the Bull Kagouti.

*ROAAR!*

The Bull Kagouti was annoyed and roared then headbutted Khloe and Kourtney away then hit Kim with its tail back at Jon.

"Damn, you are learning! But..."

Jon was surprised when Kim was kicked back at him but he performed a 'Matrix Dodge' and Kim flew over him.

"... Can you do this? Huh? I don't think so!"

During the 'Matrix Dodge', the Bull Kagouti took the chance when Jon wasn't watching and charged at him.

Jon realized it but it wasn't too late, he didn't even run to the side but charged head on and slid on the ground bypassing the Bull Kagouti by going from between its large legs.

Jon who was sliding and the scene was moving in slow motion saw something above him that made him cringe hard to the point that he missed the time to jump away. Still, he managed to roll away and stood up trying to possess what he saw.

"Damn! You are not a man you bastard? I thought you were the Alpha male of this pack!"

*ROAR!*

"Alexa! What is going on here?"

<Kagouti usually live alone or in small groups. They gather in larger groups only for mating seasons. At these times the females can be observed as the dominant sex. They might even sometimes attack the males.>

Jon couldn't help but cringe.

"This world needs to be burnt to hell before any feminist arrives… Sigh! Fine, from now on, I'll call you Caitlyn."

Caitlyn didn't seem to be happy about the name and charged at Jon once again.

***

"*Huff Huff* … How long has it been?" Jon said as he was huffing and facing Caitlyn who didn't look well either.

<1:12:33>

"Damn! This is thing is insane!"

Jon was battling the Bull Kagouti for the past hour and twelve minutes and both started to get tired and bored.

The system stated that the Kagouti were weak to Lightning Magic so Jon did his best to fight that thing with lightning but it still was a bit hard to penetrate all the thick scales of that creature.

Jon checked the states of Caitlyn and it seemed that the damn thing was really having a hard time keeping up but the problem was its stamina regeneration that was really exceptional. Luckily, with time and a lot of effort, its stamina started to regenerate slower and slower.

Jon checked his states too…

----------------------

Name: Jon

Race: Human (Nord)

Estimated States:-

Level: 35

HP: 125/390

SP: 112/310

MP: 268/954

----------------------

'That's it, huh? I still have some Magicka to spare! 'Flash Bang!''

Jon set the next curse of action and cast a spell right in front of the Bull Kagouti, once it landed, a bright blinding light exploded with a strong and annoying sound wave.

Jon has already covered his eyes and ears to avoid the spells annoying effect. Caitlyn, however, took all the damage and groaned with a roar.

"Hehe! Sorry about that but this is the end."

Jon used the chance to cast the final spell, it would take a bit of time but the spell was already powerful enough.

"Now, go to hell… Oh shi…"

Jon, who was about to achieve victory with his trump card spell, was astonished when he saw the Bull Kagouti pull itself out of the flash bang's effect and charge madly at him. It was a desperate attack as the Bull Kagouti seemed to have been really blinded by the 'Flash Bang'.

Jon tried to cast his spell a bit faster but there was no way, he tried hard to do so but the Bull Kagouti was here first. Its sharp tusks were already piercing through the air targeting Jon's head.

"Fuck!"

The spell was interrupted and Jon had to block the Bull Kagouti with his body. He had no chance but to dismiss the spell and hold onto the two big tusks that were aiming at him.

*ROAAR!*

The Bull Kagouti realized it has hit something and is it vision became clearer, it saw Jon who was pushing against it with his body while holding its tusk.

Jon's state was worsening as his interrupted spell's Magicka got backfired at him and he spat a mouthful of blood just like that…

The Bull Kagouti took the chance to push with all its might but Jon was not that easy to be pushed even by a giant creature like itself. Jon's legs were stuck into the ground while it was trying to resist the Bull Kagouti that was giving all its weight in the push.

*ROOAAR!*

"No, you won't, Caitlyn."

With its mouth free, Caitlyn started roaring at Jon who was right in front of its face. It had no forelimbs to attack Jon with which made Jon very thankful but he was being pushed back towards a dead end at an alarming rate.

*ROAR!*

"You mouth stinks dammit… huh?"

Jon had a sudden enlightenment and looked right at Caitlyn.

"Roar one more time, please."

*ROOAAA…*

"FUS RO DAH!"

*Puchi*

A massive flesh explosion happened in front of Jon and blood dyed the surrounding area.

"Damn!" Jon couldn't believe what happened in front of him. The massive Kagouti got the 'Unrelenting Force' shout through its throat and a large part behind the neck area exploded and got separated the head from the body.

Jon was just standing there and holding the mean looking big head from the tusks and really felt uncomfortable. He threw it away and sat on his butt.

"This was… hard!"

Jon didn't want to do anything anymore and just wanted to rest. From the very beginning, he didn't try to use the Thu'um looking at how destructive and cheaty it is. But in the end, he had to use it in a life or death situation.

"Phew! I guess I should go back and…"

*ROAR!*

*KWAR!*

"... or not!"

Jon looked around him and saw two more Kagoutis.

"... I suppose you must be Kylie and Kendall!"

*ROAAR!*

"Just give me a break! Dammit!"

Jon jumped up and started looked around him for a place to run away. Unfortunately, it was a dead end and the only way out is through.

Some more presences started appearing on Jon's scan and he caught a sudden headache, it seemed that there is no way but to leave the dungeon empty-handed.

While he was looking around, he saw a wide enough pipe hole in the cave's wall.

"Sigh! I guess there is only one option, let's jump into it!"


SUY NGHĨ CỦA NGƯỜI SÁNG TẠO
El_Don El_Don

A lot of Pewdiepie references were in this chapter!

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