Sitting alone inside the carriage, Bellarine was returning home.
For the whole day, she had been wasting time in her office, contemplating and reprimanding herself for the decision she made last night.
She has literally thrown herself at Richard to cross the final line with him. She didn't know what came over her but before he could stop herself, she was sharing the pool and making him all uncomfortable by pressing Richard in a corner.
'Uuuu...just thinking about it makes me ashamed...' Thinking about last night, she covered her face.
Bellarine was conscious of her feelings toward her son and she was not embarrassed to admit them. She sees Richard both as a man and as a love interest.
However, she can't force her thought process on Richard. She likes him. She is mad at him. She is obsessed with him. However, that doesn't allow her to force herself on him.
'What happened to me last night?'