Despite feeling a bit awkward, Batman still walked up and waved his hand saying, "Hey."
The Primary Universe Batman withdrew his gaze and continued fiddling with the roller coaster's control system. Deadpool, however, walked up and shook hands with Batman, then said, "I've long admired your name, Batman. How have you been lately? Still entangled with that criminal called Joker?"
"Oh, him." Batman deliberately curled his lip and said, "He's a piece of cake for me. In fact, I always feel Gordon is making too much fuss. It seems like every time that green-haired maniac shows up, I'm expected to handle it, but in reality, he's not worth mentioning. Sending a couple of cops should be enough, Batman has more important things to do."
"Like what?" Deadpool asked with a hint of curiosity.
"Well, it's... uh, making some battle plans with the Justice League, you know. I have two very powerful teammates. Actually, more than two. Besides Superman and Wonder Woman, Green Lantern and The Flash are also my good buddies. I'm the core of the entire Alliance, the most important person; they all wait for my ideas..."
"Really?" Deadpool seemed very pleased and said, "I also have a good friend, his name is Spider Man. Sounds a bit odd, right? It's hard to imagine someone getting bitten by a spider and then turning into Spiderman, but he doesn't have eight legs or all those scary eyes. He's a really lively and dependable cutie. Oh, lord, I once discussed with him about joining his team, but he rejected me. I was really heartbroken..."
"What? You mean your best friend formed a team but didn't include you?!" Batman expressed his surprise and said, "Superman and Wonder Woman would never do that. They consult me on everything. Like I said, I'm the core of the team. Being the core means the whole team is built around me..."
Deadpool looked somewhat dejected and said, "Alright, I think I should talk with Spider Man more. Not every Spider Man has to stay with his counterparts, and it's not strange to have an exception now and then. I think the two of us could totally form a team, despite what the others might think."
Batman flashed a smug smile and suddenly darted to Deadpool's side, putting an arm around him and saying, "How about this, I'll make a long-distance video call to my friends, and I can introduce them to you. They are all very outstanding superheroes. If you pass their assessment, you might get a chance to join the team."
"Really?" Deadpool said with a smug smile behind Batman's back, "Could I really join the Justice League?"
"If you pass the assessment, yes."
"You mean, you decide who can join this organization?" Deadpool employed reverse psychology and said, "If it's like you say and the team is built around you, then you must have the right to make special promotions, right?"
"Uh, yes, of course, I do, but you still have to meet them first, because a team leader must take the opinions of the team members into account. If they disagree, I'd also be troubled."
"But you could ignore their opinions."
"That wouldn't be right."
"But you could."
"Yes, I could."
"So what are we waiting for?" Deadpool reached directly to press the button on the communicator on Batman's arm. Batman instantly raised his hand to shake off Deadpool's grip and turned around to cover his arm, saying, "Hehehe, don't touch that, it's my gear."
"Alright, alright, you're too stingy," Deadpool said, waving his hand.
Batman activated the communicator, and a holographic screen popped up, showing Superman's face, which was bathed in colorful lights, and loud music could be heard through the microphone.
"Wait, wait." Batman narrowed his eyes and said, "Superman, what are you doing?"
Superman appeared a bit surprised, immediately reached out a hand to the side, and the lights disappeared. Then he smiled and said, "No, nothing, Batman. Our light is broken, I'm trying to fix it. Look, it can change to eight different colors in one second..."
Batman looked skeptical. He was about to nod when a red figure dashed across the screen and then stopped behind Superman with popcorn crumbs on his lips. He put his arms around Superman and said, "Hey, Superman, what's up? Is it your turn to dance...?"
Batman narrowed his eyes again.
"Um, he came over to bring me light bulbs." Superman spread his hands, smiling and saying, "After all, he helped me out. There's some popcorn left in the fridge; I gave it all to him. You know I'm a very generous person."
Batman tilted his head slightly and looked at him from the corner of his eye before saying, "Okay, I don't want to discuss this with you right now. I..."
Buzz—!!!
"Oh, heavens! The sound system exploded again?!" Wonder Woman's voice came from behind Superman. She yelled, "Hal! Go fix the speakers; they're giving me a headache!"
"Superman, Superman, where are you? The dice game is ready. Are you coming? Oh, I forgot, it's your turn to dance. Go ahead." Another familiar voice.
People kept calling for Superman in the background. He reluctantly turned back to respond but as he did, his arm moved slightly, and the camera captured a full view of the room.
Batman took a sharp intake of breath in disbelief.
That was... that was...
"Is that a party?" Deadpool leaned in behind Batman, looking at the room and said, "Is the Justice League having a party?"
"No!" Batman nearly screamed. "No! No, no, no!!! They can't! They can't be throwing a party! How could the Justice League possibly throw a party without me???!!"
The others in the room also saw the holographic projection on Clark's arm, but perhaps due to network issues, Batman's image was a bit choppy, and they still thought the call had been disconnected.
Wonder Woman walked over, draping an arm over Superman's shoulder, and said, "How many times have I told you, don't invite him anymore? He won't come. He'd rather play his cat-and-mouse games with the crazies in his city, using such righteous excuses to refuse us and then lecture us on top of it. It's such a buzzkill."
Batman's expression froze, and he said in disbelief, "What did Diana say? She said I'm a buzzkill??!!"
Hal came over too, patting Superman on the back, and said, "Although I also don't know why he wants to stay in Gotham 24/7 regulating traffic, but since he likes doing that, we should let him be. Forcing him against his will is hardly a good look."
The others came forward to comfort Superman, even The Flash sighed, "You kept inviting him until the very last time, but he was never going to come. He has no life of his own, prefers to be a tool for maintaining order. You have to accept that, Superman."
"You're the only one who hasn't accepted it yet," Martian Manhunter said shaking his head. "It's not your fault. Look, his single call turned a perfectly good party atmosphere sour again. Just hang up."
"No one wants you to get hurt," Wonder Woman said in a lower voice. "He's living the life he likes, and we live ours. What's wrong with that? Hang up, let's continue... Who wants to be the King?!"
"Me! Of course I'll roll the dice first! You guys are so doomed!"
"Please, your luck is so bad I can't even watch. I'll go, who wants to be on my team?!"
"Me, me, me! I trust your luck!"
With a crackle, the communication was cut off.
Batman's eyes blurred with tears.
His lips trembled uncontrollably, and tears were about to fall, in an instant turning him into a weeping bat head.
"How... How could they do this..." Batman said with a trembling voice: "They threw a party without me, how could they do this... I'm the heart of the Justice League... I'm the coolest at the parties..."
Looking up, he saw the envy in the Primary Universe Batman's eyes.
Primary Universe Batman sighed softly, turning to fiddle with a machine again, but the local Batman seemed to be struck by something, raising his voice to say, "What's with that look?! Is that pity?! I don't need your pity!!!!!"
"Could it be... could it be... Could it be that your universe's Justice League invites you to every single party? Even if you refuse a thousand times, they still call you?!"
"Sorry, yes," Primary Universe Batman said with a helpless tone. "I've declined way more than a thousand times, but a certain Kryptonian rescue dog would even fly to my bedroom and throw my bed into the party venue."
"What?!" Batman's eyes filled with tears again.
"So I'm actually envious of your companions," Universe Batman said, turning to tinker with the machine. "They know the right moment, are very independent, and can amuse themselves like normal people. They don't bother you and even play dice games on their own, instead of dragging you out of bed early in the morning to decide who gets to be the king."
Batman was stunned, gazing longingly at Primary Universe Batman, "Really? Did they do that to you? Even deciding who plays in the party games falls to you?"
Primary Universe Batman paused in his work, sighed gently, and said hesitantly, "Did Superman ever ask you for fashion advice for his dates?"
Batman froze on the spot, turning into a gray and white statue. Deadpool crumbled him with just a light touch.
Fortunately, he was a Minifigure and quickly pieced himself back together. By that time, Primary Universe Batman had already stood up to leave. He grabbed the other's long cape and asked through clenched teeth, fiercely, "Are you saying that your universe's Superman even has you help decide what to wear for dates?!"
Primary Universe Batman pursed his lips, convinced he must have imagined the sob in the other's tone.
He also caught his cape and pulled back, but since the other wouldn't let go, Primary Universe Batman reluctantly said, "Do you really think that's something to be happy about? He is an adult, not a baby. He doesn't need me to stuff a pacifier in his mouth, but he always tries to make me do it."
In Batman's mind, however, appeared an image of baby Superman, and after a long while, he wiped his drool and zipped over to Primary Universe Batman's side, wrapping an arm around his shoulder and said, "Hey, buddy, we are the same person, so..."
Primary Universe Batman elegantly raised a hand to stop him mid-sentence, then said, "First of all, just because we look alike, have the same name, the same codename, and wear the same outfit, does not mean we are the same person."
"Um... but we do look alike, right?"
"That's only what you think."
"But at least in the eyes of others, we are the same person from different universes..." Batman roared. "Don't you dare contradict me!!! Now tell me, what is your secret to being so close to Superman? If not, forget about going through with your plan!!"